A netizen on Zhihu asked, "When you encounter a problem, you will be irritable, anxious and panic, and you will often complain that you cannot bear this and that, and you will be even more depressed when facing failure... I feel that you are very fragile, what should I do?
In contrast, we ourselves, are you in life the same way? We are always very concerned about the voices of the outside world, always inferior, always easy to self-loath, always worried about gains and losses, always afraid of changes, etc.
In fact, as long as we are alive, we will encounter various setbacks and traumas at any time, so we will encounter all kinds of setbacks and traumas at any time...
In fact, as long as we are alive, we will encounter various setbacks and traumas at any time. Possibility. Therefore, occasional sense of fragility is also a very common mentality. But if you are often troubled by these ideas, then your sense of fragility needs to be intervened and adjusted.
"Anti-fragility - Benefit from Uncertainty" is a book that teaches you to change the state of fragility. The author is American writer Taleb, who mainly studies "randomness", "uncertainty", "rare events" and other issues.
1. Do you know what "anti-fragility" constitution is?
If you ask everyone what is the antonym of "frailty"? I believe most people will say it is "stubborn". The author believes that the opposite of fragility is not tenacious but anti-frailty. Then what is " anti-frailty "? In the book, the author describes three states of life:
The first type, when encountering unsatisfactory things, it is like a glass ball, it will break when it falls to the ground, which belongs to the "frail" constitution;
The second type, when encountering setbacks, it is like a plastic cup, falling to the ground, it will deform. But it is generally intact. Such people have a "tenifiable" physique;
Third, failure occurs, like a rubber ball, which falls to the ground. It is not only not bad, but also bounces higher. Such people have a "anti-frail" physique.
tells another story. The little mouse and the dwarf are in the maze and find a warehouse that stores a lot of cheese. This discovery makes them happy for a long time. Until one day, the cheese disappeared. The two little mice quickly accepted the facts in desperation and quickly took action to find new cheeses. In the end, they also found a better one. The cheese. But the two dwarfs are unwilling to accept reality, and are depressed all day long, complaining about the world, and can only wait to starve to death day by day...
So, what is "anti-fragility"? In fact, "anti-fragility" is a new word created by the author Taleb. It represents a kind of ability to still gain growth and gain benefits in unpredictable and sudden changes.
2. Why do we become people with "anti-fragility" constitution?
Everyone knows that the epidemic The situation makes our employment situation very tense. We may have some relatives or friends around us who are experiencing layoffs or looking for a job.
When the economic environment is good and the career path is relatively smooth, everything is fine, but once a storm hits, you will find problems in life, such as mortgages, car loans, and children's education.
Because we habitually place our expectations for life in one place. When this fulcrum is unstable, the whole life and heart will face severe tests and challenges.
So the "35-year-old phenomenon" and so on. To put it bluntly, its essence is "fragile state". Because the biggest risk of this phenomenon is not unemployment, but psychological endurance.
Everyone has heard of this saying, "The only thing that remains unchanged in this world is change." If you look closely, any living object is anti-fragility to a certain extent.
Therefore, in order to meet various challenges and opportunities in life, we need to have the ability to "anti-fragility". This ability can be fragile in ourselves. Learn when you are weak, but the price you pay will be very high.
But if you are an anxious and sensitive person, then you will learn from these traits and gain this ability faster and earlier than others.
3. How to become a person with an "anti-frailty" constitution?
So, how can we become a person with a "anti-frailty" constitution? The author gave the method:
Method 1: Allow yourself to make mistakes.The author says that if we always do only the affirmative and the right things, we will become increasingly vulnerable. Everyone should have heard of Michael Jordan . He once said in an advertisement, "I have made more than 9,000 shots without hits. I have lost about 300 games. There were 26 times, people believed that I would shoot a decisive goal, but I didn't." Jordan dared to fail and he accepted his failure.
Because errors represent fluctuations, fluctuations will allow us to learn different things and cognitions. This will make us stronger and will also increase our "anti-fragility" again.
Method 2: Get out of the "comfort zone" and actively create fluctuations.
Dr. Madeline, the author of "Get Out of the Comfort Zone", once said that her mother encouraged her and her sister to do "fear" things since she was a child. The mother did not ignore her and her sister's feelings, but wanted them to discover their true selves and the world.
And the doctor also discovered through repeated attempts and breakthroughs that those things that once scared her were actually not as terrifying as she imagined.
Indeed, everything is easy to use in the comfort zone, but one of the biggest problems with this environment is the serious lack of variability and randomness. Therefore, getting out of our comfort zone and having the courage to try and make breakthroughs will help improve our "anti-fragility" capabilities.
Method 3: Establish redundancy as much as possible and actively reserve or invest. The author says redundancy is very anti-fragile.
For example, for example, many ancient buildings have been preserved well until now, because the former architects spared no effort to retain a lot of spare for the buildings. It is precisely because of these redundancy that these buildings can be retained for more than we imagined.
In contrast, some buildings today are too careful to calculate the so-called right amount by mathematical method, but they are actually fragile. Because of this relatively utilitarian approach, there is no room for establishment or reserve.
As the saying goes, "If you have time, you are the master", which actually means this. But the "leisure" here is not the leisure we understand or the leisure we do nothing. It really means a kind of calmness with surplus or abundance of energy. "Without space and without spare, you can't enjoy anything. It's hard for people to enjoy it all the time in a just right and very careful state.
So, in our busy life, develop hobbies, take a break from the busy life, leave room for ourselves and reserve, only in this way can we have enough energy to transform infinite possibilities, and use this to improve our "anti-fragility".
Written at the end:
There are many sudden and unpredictable things in this world, and we are in changes all the time. And when facing these unknowns, unpredictables, and uncertainties, "Anti-fragility" tells us that fragility or strength is not necessary at this time. We only need to become people with "anti-fragility" physique. Because only in this way can we reach out to make all the unexpected happen in the impermanence.
