1
The easiest time for two people to break up is when they are busy getting married, and the main reason why two people are most likely to break up is often because of the unreasonable demands of their future mother-in-law.
Xie Yang (pseudonym) and her fiancé Sun Wei broke up on the eve of their wedding.
2Xie Yang and Sun Wei were college classmates. They established a relationship when they were sophomores. After graduation, they did not separate, but their relationship became better and better.
After four years of long-distance love, the two finally got engaged with the blessing of their parents and started preparations for the wedding.
Xie Yang and Sun Wei's family circumstances are both middle-income families, and they can be considered to be well matched. Xie Yang's parents bought a car as her dowry, and Sun Wei's parents had already prepared the wedding room early in the morning.
Now the two of them are busy decorating the house. Although it is tedious, they are filled with indescribable joy. Regarding the decoration style of the house, Sun Wei did not have too many opinions. He left the decision-making power to Xie Yang.
However, Sun Wei's mother always has some opinions on decoration matters. She and Xie Yang have completely different ideas on decoration style. Xie Yang likes the simple style. She thinks that this style of house looks more atmospheric, simpler and brighter.
But Sun Wei’s mother felt that the wedding room should be decorated more festively, so as to symbolize that the life was getting more and more prosperous.
The different ideas of the two generations will inevitably lead to disputes when they meet. Xie Yang always feels that she, the prospective mother-in-law, is too busy, and the future home of her and Sun Wei should be designed according to their preferences, but the prospective mother-in-law But he always likes to have a hand.
Every time Xie Yang went to choose decoration materials , her prospective mother-in-law would go with her. The original agreement was just to help with consultation, but in the end it became her forced decision.
This made Xie Yang feel very aggrieved. The place where he wanted to live in the future could not be arranged according to his own ideas, and he really couldn't appreciate the style chosen by his mother-in-law. When he thought about having to face these strange things every day in the future, Xie Yang was very annoyed by the decoration style.
Sun Wei saw Xie Yang's displeasure, and he comforted him and said: "My mother's personality is like this. She likes to make the decision in everything. Don't worry about it. We will live together in the future. The decoration of this house is not satisfactory. , Let’s change it later.”
Xie Yang thought to himself, it would be so easy to renovate this already installed house. Not only would it be more time-consuming and labor-intensive, but it would also cost twice as much as now.
But Xie Yang looked at Sun Wei who greeted him with a smile and said nothing more. She didn't want to ruin the relationship between the two because of these trivial things, so she made a concession and the decoration of the wedding room was all in accordance with her mother-in-law's wishes. .
Unexpectedly, my mother-in-law became more aggressive. Once they went to the building materials market to select materials. Her mother-in-law still chose according to her own preferences. This time Xie Yang did not say anything, but she had to agree to whatever her mother-in-law chose. .
No one raised objections to her, and her mother-in-law felt very happy. On the way home, she kept talking to Xie Yang about her design of the house. When she was getting excited, her mother-in-law suddenly said: "After all, From now on, it will be the house I live in, and the house I personally designed is what I want."
The mother-in-law's unintentional words made Xie Yang frown. She and Sun Wei had already said before that they would never marry each other. She lived with her parents-in-law, and Sun Wei agreed at the time. But now, her mother-in-law said that she would live in this marital home in the future, which surprised Xie Yang.
Xie Yang looked solemn along the way. It wasn't until he sent his mother-in-law home that Xie Yang asked about Sun Wei. However, Sun Wei said that he did not know anything about it, and his mother had never told him about living together in the future.
Xie Yang looked at Sun Wei who looked sincere and believed what he said. She told Sun Wei that he must find time to ask this matter clearly. If his parents want to live with her in the future, they must find a way. to solve this problem.
Days passed, and Xie Yang felt a big stone in his heart, so he was always depressed all day long. She had been waiting for Sun Wei's reply, but for some reason, Sun Wei always avoided this matter. Don't talk.
The wedding of the two people is coming soon, and their wedding room is almost decorated. Looking at the festive look of the house, Xie Yang is not happy at all, because this house is not what she imagined she would like.
Suddenly one day, her mother-in-law came to the wedding room carrying large and small bags. Xie Yang thought at first that her mother-in-law was here to help clean up, so he quickly said to her: "Don't worry about cleaning up the house. Sun Wei and I will do it." Two people can finish it, just rest aside."
As soon as Xie Yang finished speaking, his mother-in-law walked towards the master bedroom with something in hand. Xie Yang looked at Sun Wei with a confused look, but Sun Wei's His eyes kept evading.
Xie Yang suddenly had a bad feeling. She followed her mother-in-law's footsteps and came to the door of the master bedroom. I saw my mother-in-law opening the package she brought and taking out sheets, quilts, and pillows.
Xie Yang didn't know what her mother-in-law was going to do. Although the house had been renovated, the furniture and appliances had not been bought yet, so there was no room for people to live in it. She really couldn't figure out what her mother-in-law was doing with these things at this time.
The mother-in-law didn't care about anything and spread the sheets directly on the floor. Xie Yang walked into the bedroom and asked her mother-in-law what she was doing. However, the mother-in-law said to Xie Yang disapprovingly: "Sun Wei's father and I will live in this house from now on. Living together, we can take care of each other."
Xie Yang looked at his mother-in-law in surprise, but she didn't say anything, but turned around and walked out of the bedroom and walked towards Sun Wei. Sun Wei knew he was in the wrong and lowered his head and did not dare to look at Xie Yang.
Looking at Sun Wei's appearance, Xie Yang knew that it was useless to talk more now. She said to Sun Wei: "In that case, then you can live with your mother, let's stop here." After saying that, Xie Yang left the wedding room resolutely.
3Usually before marriage, you can see a person and his family most clearly. This is also the reason why so many couples suddenly break up before marriage.
Through Xie Yang’s story, we should understand the following two truths:
1. The mother-in-law who often interfered in the lives of two people before marriage will only get worse after marriage.
Mother-in-laws always like to criticize the lives of their sons and daughter-in-law. They always think that they are experienced, but their sons and daughter-in-law know nothing.
But these mothers-in-law do not understand that the two generations of different generations have completely different living habits and views on things.
Of course, these mothers-in-law have a purpose in intervening in the lives of their sons and daughter-in-law in every possible way, which is to declare their sovereignty and suppress the arrogance of their daughters-in-law.
They do this to let their daughter-in-law know that she is the real owner of the family, and the daughter-in-law will still be an outsider after all, so the daughter-in-law must obey her mother-in-law and be filial and filial.
For people like Xie Yang's mother-in-law-to-be, her son and daughter-in-law have not yet gotten married, so she has started to interfere in their affairs. Of course, she has always interfered in the decoration of the house, so that she can live comfortably in the future.
Before Xie Yang even got married, her mother-in-law-to-be had already shown her strong and unreasonable side. It is conceivable that in the days after marriage, her mother-in-law would only become more aggressive.
2. Some problems must be solved before marriage, otherwise it will only become more and more troublesome after marriage.
The period before marriage is the time when it is easiest to see the true face of the other party. At this time, both parties will unconsciously expose a side of themselves that has never been shown before.
In life, many couples will quarrel before marriage, and even break up in serious cases. This is because people tend to get carried away most easily when they are close to the end of victory.
people are most likely to expose their shortcomings when they get carried away, and some tedious preparations before marriage will intensify the quarrel between the two.
Various problems will continue to arise at this time. In fact, this is also a good phenomenon. If you find the problem early, you can solve it early to avoid similar situations from happening again after marriage.
The sooner some problems are discovered, the further away they will be from the abyss. For those issues that do not involve principles, couples should communicate calmly and resolve them in a timely manner. For those issues that touch the bottom line, we should treat them rationally. Stay away in time.
We should not be afraid that conflicts will arise before marriage and affect each other's feelings, because this is the only time when we can see each other clearly, and it is also the only time when we can nip problems and conflicts in the cradle.
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