I saw a netizen saying that he knew a year-end friend who was much younger than him. After they had been together for a long time, the netizen learned about the family situation of this younger friend. Out of the mentality of someone who had experienced it, he kindly Kindly remind the young friend.
asked her to focus on her work, because if she does not have special skills at work, the older she gets, the less competitive she will be. He also gave her several specific suggestions.
Who would have expected that as soon as the netizen finished speaking, her child said to her impatiently: I am living a very happy life now. The implication is to let netizens mind their own business and just be themselves. Then the relationship between them gradually faded a lot .
Someone once said: The most stupid behavior in the world is to constantly reason with others.
I think this netizen is just a kind reminder and a kind-hearted persuasion from someone who has been through it. There is no need for the other person to get angry, let alone say that to this netizen. But I also think that the sense of propriety and boundaries between people is very important. Taking care of yourself more and not crossing others is the best way to live for the rest of our lives.
Sometimes kindness is just a "misunderstanding of self-understanding"
In life, there are often some "kindnesses" around us. They kindly remind you what to do, and then forward some links that they think are kind reminders to others. , will also use the kindness of others to convey her "sincerity", and will not give up until others tell her in words that doing so really makes others feel bad.
Sometimes, seemingly well-intentioned reminders and preaching may not necessarily be recognized sincerely, but they may also bring unnecessary trouble to yourself. These people think they are just reminding others with good intentions and preaching to others with good intentions. It is just a misunderstanding and a mistake in self-understanding. However, always thinks that they are right. Although they have not caused much harm to others, if others If you really listen to her kindness, unexpected things will happen.
I remember that there was a sister who always introduced health care products to prevent menopause to those of us who have just retired. At first, we were all members of the same team because we were exercising together. I was embarrassed to be disrespectful to her, so I just listened. Just listen.
But some people believe that this is a magic medicine. They always think that if they take it, they will be cured immediately and it can cure all diseases. I spent a lot of money to buy it and took it for a long time. Not only did I not feel that my symptoms were relieved, but I also had more and more menopausal problems.
You can imagine that one thought he was giving a well-intentioned reminder and preaching, and the other thought it was a good idea, but it turned out to be the opposite. The two people not only quarreled in person, but also almost had a fight, and eventually they stopped communicating with each other.
In fact, many times, the goodwill between people is only limited to the point, rather than the kind of good-natured and well-intentioned endless preaching. Not only will it offend others, but it will also bring displeasure to yourself.
Kindness should be moderate and should not be forced. Everyone’s suffering needs to be overcome by oneself.
Kindness preaching should be moderate. It cannot be a detour you have taken. Others must go around it. Maybe, there are some detours in that everyone must go through. , rather than being avoided by others’ well-intentioned preaching.
There are often people around us who preach to people who have just entered the industry as if they have been there before, especially those who particularly like to "be a role model". They feel that the hardships and sins they have suffered on this road should be repaid as soon as possible. Tell the newcomers carefully so that they don’t have to go through it all over again.
However, the heart is good and kind. But there are some hardships, some tiredness, and some detours that newcomers must go through. It is also possible that even if you have gone through detours and suffered a lot, you may not be right.
I remember when I first learned Tai Chi in the square, in addition to the master's explanations, there were also kind-hearted seniors who were willing to give what they had learned. I will take the trouble to tell you over and over again that this pose is not practiced correctly, how it needs to be practiced, and how it should be performed.
But after a long time, you will find that not all the senior students explain to you are correct, and there are also many mistakes in personal understanding. However, because the other party is kind and well-intentioned, and you are embarrassed to say more, you have to stop practicing and wait until When there is no one around, practice a little bit according to the master's instructions. When you practice together, you are corrected by such a kind-hearted senior sister. You slowly feel in your heart that it is better to practice alone. Spend more time with the master and with real people. If you are good at studying, you will go astray. Otherwise, you will slowly go astray.
In fact, when learning to practice Tai Chi, everyone has to go through a lot of hardship and fatigue, sweat and time, before they can slowly get the taste of learning Tai Chi. Just follow this today and learn tomorrow. And if you follow that preaching, you will not be able to practice your own Tai Chi. Only those who have experienced can understand its taste.
For the rest of your life, be yourself and not cross others
Wang Zengqi once said: I think that the most beautiful days are when you get up in the morning to serve flowers, make tea when you are free, take a nap in the sun, walk in the drizzle, and read under the night light. Here In the clear time, has fireworks and poetry in one hand, letting the flowers bloom and fall outside the window, and the clouds come and go, naturally the aftertaste is endless and all kinds of comfort.
For the rest of your life, be yourself and don’t cross others. is about respecting yourself and protecting yourself. When you don’t have the ability to help others, you might as well put away your kindness and do your best in a down-to-earth manner.
Many troubles in life come from insufficient self-understanding. I always think that I can help others, but forget that being yourself is the most important thing.
Not helping others is not selfish and heartless, but when you are not capable enough, only by being yourself can you be prepared to help others. Sometimes, our kindness and kindness may not be what others need at that time. We must learn to respect others and help others when they need it and we have the ability. Otherwise, we will harm others in the name of goodwill, or even disrespect. other people.
In this life, it is rare for us to be good at ourselves. If we can truly help others, that is true kindness. Otherwise, we are doing bad things with good intentions.
In this life, unless you want to change yourself, it will be difficult for others to change you. It takes a lifetime of practice to be a good person. The best way a person can be is not to change others, but to change himself.
For the rest of your life, you must be yourself and don’t cross others, so that you can make your life better and better!
Author: Huagui Zenxin
Pay attention to my words and enter your soul. You have stories, I have tea, and we can chat for the rest of our lives together.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.
