Author: Wen Qiusheng
Original article, plagiarism will be prosecuted
01, introduction
Marriage is like a turning point for women. Although life is still rushing forward, it is completely different from the previous direction.
After marriage, women should adapt to their in-laws’ lives and also have plans for their own family. When you walk out of your parents' home, you must know how to get along with your parents' family in the right way.
After getting married, it means establishing a new family. After walking out of your parents’ home, you will feel boundary.
When you get along with your parents’ home, you need to maintain principles and pay attention to your sense of proportion.
Zhou Guoping said: "A sense of proportion is a sign of mature love. It knows that in interpersonal communication, obey the necessary distance between people."
If you get along with your mother's family without a sense of boundary, it will not only consume yourself excessively, but may also lead to conflicts between your mother's family and her family, which is not conducive to the management of marriage.
A woman with high emotional intelligence will maintain a sense of boundaries with her two families and will not help her parents' family.
02. Do not interfere too much in the decision of your mother’s family and interfere with
Women with high emotional intelligence, know how to give yourself everything and leave room for others.
After getting married, you will not express your opinions at will at will at will, and will not interfere or interfere too much in your family.
Although my parents grew up, after getting married, don’t participate in many decisions at will. Just follow the wishes of supporting your parents.
Smart women will give appropriate suggestions or remind them of the risks of a matter when facing the decisions made by their parents and brothers.
In my parents' home, maybe a woman was the person in charge of the helm, but when she leaves her parents' home, she must learn to let go.
Especially, after the brothers and sisters get married, they have new members at home, so they must learn to maintain a sense of proportion, but interfere more in the affairs of their parents’ and brothers’ families.
Everyone has a different lifestyle. Don’t point fingers at other people’s lives or talk nonsense, especially your closest family.
At my parents' home, you must be sensible when speaking and doing things. Don't make your family feel embarrassed, no longer united, and don't always consider the problem from your own perspective.
Whether it is parents or siblings, they have the right to choose their own lifestyle. Only by giving respect and understanding can the family get along better.
03. Don’t have no bottom line. You will always be willing to your younger sister and younger brother
After getting married, the woman and her brother and sister means that she has “divided up”. We should grow up and assume family responsibilities.
can provide appropriate help to your mother's family, but don't respond to your younger brother and sister without any bottom line, don't let them rely too much and stop growing.
room Sijin in " Anjia ", went to a big city to work hard, just because she wanted to escape from the home that suffocated her.
After she started working, she was constantly squeezed by her mother and asked her to send money home. If she didn't send it, she came to ask for it. It is said that it is to treat the doctor of Fang Sijin's grandfather who loves the most in the family, but in fact, all the money is spent on her younger brother.
helps my younger brother build a house and prepares a bride price. Fang Sijin didn't want to support them without any bottom line or principle, and refused to give her money to her mother and younger brother. After
, Fang Sijin changed the way she helped her younger brother and no longer gave him money. Instead, I gave my younger brother a chance to work as an electrician in the company. As long as you are willing to work and endure hardships, you can support yourself.
Many women, after getting married, because they have younger brothers at home, their parents always advised her to help their younger brothers more.
However, there is no bottom line to help my younger brother, which will only stop growing and develop a strong dependence mentality.
Everyone should be responsible for their own life, and no one is exceptional. The sister cannot replace her parents, nor can she carry the burden on her younger brother.
Don’t respond to your younger brother’s requests. Let your younger brother get rid of dependence so that he can grow faster. Only by becoming a man who stands tall can you truly shoulder the burden of a family.
04. You must also maintain the principle of "rescue the impoverished but not the poor" for your parents' home
. After getting married, you must maintain the principle of "rescue the impoverished but not the poor" for your parents' home. Don't drag down your family because of money.
The husband and wife are a whole. No matter what decision is made, they must be approved by the husband. The basis for maintaining a happy marriage is to have a discussion and magnanimity between two people.
If a woman always hides her husband from her husband, she will spend more and more money to supplement her parents' home. It seems to be a way to repay your parents and be filial, but in fact it causes serious crisis to your marriage.
If parents and brothers are not satisfied and ask for more money from women, it will increase the conflict between the in-laws and their parents' family.
American Marriage Columnist Henry Crowder said: "Those who cross the line will never feel that they cross the line, because it is the ones that hurt others."
If parents and brothers have more desires and needs for life and want to live a better life, they should rely on their own hands to get it.
After getting married, don’t just subsidize your parents’ family to prevent your family from being crushed.
can help your parents when they encounter major events, but don’t let their parents develop dependence. If you leave, you don’t know how to live on your own.
05, Send a message to
After getting married, women not only need to maintain their small family, but also need to manage their relationship with their parents’ family.
Bi Shumin said: "Keeping a distance close to each other is the most appropriate way of communication."
Women, however, interfere with their mother's family's decisions and choices, but they cannot alienate their family affection. You can go home frequently and bring some food and clothing to your parents.
If the younger brother and sister are still young, encourage them to study hard or work hard based on their own abilities. Grow up through tempering, do not rely on anyone, live out yourself.
Run your own small family well, keep a sense of boundaries and proportions with your parents' family, and get along in a way that is comfortable for each other, and a woman's life will be happier.
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About the author: Hearing the autumn voice, using his words to make a living. The autumn wind boils rain, a glass of sake, a story of three or two, and you are with you on the lonely road.
