Couple and halfway through, and meet someone with destiny halfway through.
After experiencing a failed marriage, many people will cherish it more after starting a family again, but there are exceptions. Some couples will care about money, even if they make a lot of money, they will not be happy at all.
This is how Mr. Peng and Ms. Li were married for 20 years and were angry for 18 years. The mediator couldn't bear it anymore and sent a soul-searching question: "You hate each other so much, why do you still have to live together?"
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Ms. Li and Mr. Peng are second-married couples, and the husband and ex-wife have a son.
When I first got married, Mr. Peng took the money very seriously and did not take the living expenses at home after paying his salary. Ms. Li needs money and can only use the money she earns. It is difficult after pregnancy and she can't get it even if she wants to eat fruit.
Ms. Li, who has a strong personality, can't stand this kind of life. After her daughter was one month old, she found a way to do business and borrowed money from her parents as startup capital.
Her approach was naturally opposed by Mr. Peng, who felt that she was disregarded.
So, Ms. Li proposed the AA system, where her husband takes care of her ex-wife's son, and she takes care of her two daughters. She pays half of the living expenses at home, and no one cares about their income.
Ms. Li is a stingy person. Although she can not take care of the other person's son, she still cannot ignore . She paid more than half of her son's tuition fee when she got married. When her son got married, she took out 200,000 yuan to buy a house.
In response to this, Mr. Peng said that they are all family members. As a stepmother, shouldn’t you get some money?
Ms. Li asked back: " Then why don't you care about your daughter? When my daughter was in college, I just rented a storefront and the funds in my hands were really too much to turn over. I asked you to help pay the tuition first, but you don't take a penny?"
Mr. Peng was confident: "Didn't you ask for the AA system? Your daughter is under your control, why should I pay?"
These details reflect Mr. Peng's selfish nature. Even if he can distinguish between his wife's financial situation, he should not ignore his daughter's affairs. He treats special circumstances and special treatment. How can he ignore his daughter's tuition?
Ms. Li said a small thing, saying that she really couldn't stand it anymore.
Once she went home, it happened to be dinner time and didn't eat outside.
After entering the house, she saw her husband and son eating noodles, so she went into the kitchen to take a look and found that there were chopstick noodles and two vegetables in the pot. She made it into a bowl and ate it. Of course, this little noodles would not be full. She saw that there was a lot of noodles in her husband's bowl and wanted her to give herself some noodles.
As a result, her husband stood up and poured out the unfinished noodles directly from . This incident made Ms. Li very excited. She walked into the room and couldn't help crying. Ms. Li didn't understand, what is the significance of this marriage in ?
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Since your husband can’t give you love, why don’t you leave?
Anyone with a discerning eye can see that there is no love between Mr. Peng and Ms. Li, and if they are separated, it may be good for each other.
But their marriage lasted for 20 years, and she has been persisting in , which actually reflects her lack of love in her heart.
Ms. Li was also very injured in her first marriage. Her ex-husband is a mother-in-law and her mother-in-law has a strong desire to control her. She is not valued at all in her in-laws’ family.
She really wanted to take her ex-husband out to live independently, but her ex-husband refused to leave the house, and her mother-in-law also accused her of, feeling that she had destroyed family unity. In the end, she could only leave sadly.
knows Mr. Peng. She thinks that the other party has been hurt in love and knows how to cherish marriage. She doesn’t care that the other party has a son. She thinks that as long as she treats each other sincerely, she can get along well.
Ms. Li has a good relationship with her stepchild. Her husband has no time to pick him up and drop him off at work. She is always running back and forth to take care of her stepchild. People who don’t know about it think she is her biological mother. She really hopes to get the other party’s recognition, but unfortunately, her husband is not satisfied.
In Mr. Peng's opinion, his wife has a strong personality and is not gentle at all. He hopes that the other party can put family first, respect his feelings, and be a good wife and mother.
You can see that Mr. Peng is macho. He wants to become the controller of the family. It is best to be a hand-off manager, do nothing, and his wife should not spend his money.
How can I obtain the two-dimensional Dharma in the world, and live up to the Tathagata and never let you down.
If you want your wife to be gentle and family-oriented, you must give the other person a sense of security. If you want your wife to make more money, you must learn to respect and understand the other person.
When Mr. Peng needed money, he took the money too seriously and refused to give his wife the living expenses he deserved. Seeing that his wife earned too much money, he felt that his wife ignored her family. If the thinking of
is not changed, it will be difficult to make the family stable.
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TV series " Tiandao ", Ouyang Xue has this line: "I can make money myself and have the ability to take care of myself, why should I get married?"
Women are financially independent and have a higher pursuit of life.
This does not mean that she opposes love, but that she has high requirements for her lover . If the other party cannot be evenly matched, she would rather lose than give in than give in.
Ms. Li lacks confidence. A simple bowl of noodles can defeat her. She is too fragile.
Another person has experienced this. When he goes home, he sees that he doesn’t have his own food. He can turn around and leave. He buys whatever he wants. What’s so uncomfortable? Since has chosen the AA system, don’t have too high expectations for your husband.
Ms. Li said: " I want to divorce. Tell me, how much do I want to share?"
It can be seen that she is the party with a strong family's financial strength. If she divorces, her husband may share part of her money, and she is also prepared for this.
Is this the truth about Ms. Li?
obviously not!
Two people who value money very much, it is difficult for her to share the money with the other party. The reason why she said this is actually a condescending attitude, wanting her husband to lose face and then give up when she sees the difficulties.
This psychological confrontation has no effect on reconciliation of feelings. They are tearing apart while refusing to let go. This is also the reason why the two can persist in their marriage for so many years.
If you don’t love it anymore, letting go is also a choice.
A netizen's words are incisive: "Divorce, let the other party go, let yourself go."
Since the two live together, there is no emotional exchange, and the economy is also AA system, why not separate early and plan your second half of your life.
Economic AA system has a certain impact on marriage. After calculating the money, we also lose our feelings.
If neither of you want to tolerate each other, life will be full of conspiracy, from mortgage loans and children's tuition fees to small expenses for oil, salt, sauce and vinegar, you have to figure it out clearly, it is really tiring.
Men with high emotional intelligence will know how to take the initiative to contribute to their families and assume the responsibilities of being husband and father. Ms. Li is hard-working and willing to worry about her children. She just wants a little love, what's wrong with it?
Mr. Peng cannot give her love, which is not Ms. Li's problem. She can live independently and there is no need to cry for the other party's selfishness. Sometimes, stopping the loss in time is also a kind of wisdom.
What do you think about this? Can you accept the AA system of marriage?