文|仙仙
It is said that no cat is free from sex, but I don’t believe this, especially in love, it is not difficult to fall in love with one person for the rest of your life, so why should you fall in love with another person? Most of the people who say this kind of thing are making excuses for their own cheating and forcing their own faults on all men. One mouse excrement spoils the whole pot of soup.
However, in the face of her husband’s remarks after cheating, how should a wife respond? Bystanders almost all decide to divorce, and are unforgivable for cheating.
However, it is not that simple, especially those women who have had stable relationships for many years and have children together. Their desire for happiness and giving their children a complete family is far stronger than their inner pain, so for those women who have had an affair after an affair, It's not that they are stupid enough to believe what men say, but they have to believe it, even if they lie to themselves.
Not long ago, I received a letter from an eldest sister, telling what happened to her husband in the ten years since they were married. I can feel her reluctance to give up on the marriage, but more of it is her helplessness. She would rather lie to herself and think that her husband He cheated on his wife accidentally, because he made "a mistake that all men make", because he thought what he said was right, and because the woman opposite him pestered him to do all this. How does
actually work? You can feel it for yourself after reading it. I will organize the conversation as follows.
"My husband and I are college classmates. We have been married for more than ten years. We have two children, twins, and my husband is a university professor.
In August last year, I found out that he had cheated on a female student. After a quarrel at home, he deleted it. I got all the contact information of the female student and promised not to contact her again (his student had graduated at the time).
But half a year later, in February, my husband met the student again and they were still together. Later, I didn’t know why. What? That woman went to work to find him. He was very face-conscious and told me that he collapsed and was too embarrassed to go to work. He said that the woman was setting him up to set him up and ask him to divorce me. The female student was so promiscuous that she didn't understand many of the teachers.
I was furious and hated the student for forcing my family and husband into this situation. I called the woman and scolded her.
But the student said she was contacting him. Because my husband has been mentally controlling her and took indecent photos and videos of her, and he is a person with the letter Q. At that time, he lied to her about s and m, which was just a kind of qqu.
She also said that she only started to treat my husband as a teacher. In awe, it was my husband who kept talking to her every day and midnight, saying that he was in a bad mood and under great pressure. She just begged him to delete those things and give her a guarantee.
retorted that it was my husband who said he was divorced. After finding out last year, she has been undergoing psychological counseling because she seems to have lost her self. My husband has always said that I go too far and asked her to understand.
I don’t know why, but I always don’t believe it and blame all the mistakes on the girl. , kept scolding the girl, and she said that in this case, let others distinguish right from wrong. The female student reported him. For the sake of my family, I asked my husband, the leader of the college, to find her together, hoping to give her a sum of money to let her Stop making trouble.
But that girl doesn’t want money, she wants to be fair in everything she says, and she didn’t spend a penny from him when she was with my husband. I still don’t want to believe it. .
Now the students, teachers and leaders of their school know about this. He has been dismissed from his post and his spirit has collapsed. I still have two children and cannot get a divorce!
I feel like my husband and I have known each other for so many years, and he can’t be that kind of person. He is very good to me and the children. Maybe he has really been tricked? Don’t these chat records explain anything? I really hate that female student for turning my beautiful family into this, but if I go find her and she posts it online, will the child be involved? "
There is no doubt that the eldest sister has deep feelings for her family and her husband. Therefore, although she was upset when her husband cheated, she never thought about divorce. Even if she learned that her husband cheated for the second time, she just hated the female students who cheated with her husband. It seems that there is not much blame on the husband.
In fact, this is a very puzzling thing. After all, this man has cheated on her again and again and had ambiguous relationships with other girls, especially with a girl. The title of university professor obviously has a family, but does not understand the dignity of being a teacher. This shows that there is something wrong with the quality of life, and no matter how much knowledge is learned, it is in vain.
Furthermore, it is the eldest sister herself. It turns out that love can make people happy. Lost, more than ten years of marriage also makes it difficult to tell the difference between east, west and north. The eldest sister believes everything her husband says, but completely denies what the girl says. In my opinion, this is what Lu Xun said about pretending to sleep but not screaming. Wake up people, because even if the words from the girl's mouth are not all true, there must be a third of it. However, this is the husband's lie. Why would he deny it completely?
Maybe this result will make the marriage happy forever. But how long can this false happiness last?
There is a saying that "there is only zero or countless cheating times." The same is true for men. Men who are truly virtuous and have self-control will never commit such a beast. Ordinary mistakes, in other words, this kind of animal-like mistakes can only be made by animals, so they are not worthy of forgiveness and are not worthy of forgiveness.
I think it is easy to solve the pain of the eldest sister. What does it mean that I have two children and cannot leave. ? A woman’s view of her professor husband has a filter. Based on his behavior, he may have cheated on her a long time ago. At the same time, the cheating partner is not only the female student, so this kind of marriage has long been meaningless, and she will continue to suffer. This chaos not only causes pain to oneself, but also affects the growth of the child. After all, why should such a father be a father? Is he worthy?
Yishu once said: "Love yourself calmly and then love others." "
Only those who know how to love themselves are worthy of the love of others. Otherwise, asking for love is a luxury, and there is no happiness at all. Happiness with betrayal and lies is at stake, and it will disappear in an instant. Be brave, and separation may be the real thing. The beginning of happiness!
