Author: Qingtian (Columnist of Fushu)
"Miscellaneous Notes on the Book of Rites" says: If you are open but not relaxed, you will not be able to do so. If it is relaxed but not loose, it is not done by civil and military officials. One tension and one relaxation is the way of civil and military affairs.
means that the bow string should be tightened sometimes and relaxed sometimes. This is the strategy of the Wenwu King's rule of the country. This is still needed to govern the country, and the way of life cannot be contrary to each other.
The best way to live is: people are like springs, tight and tight. If they should be loose, they will be loose, and if they should be tight, they will be tight.
Really powerful people live a "supple and tight life".
Temperament is "supple" and the hardness and softness are combined
In the just-concluded hit drama "Their Names ", Ren Duomei is a full-time housewife, but she is well aware of the hardness and softness of family relationship management.
Ren Duomei is young and beautiful, her mother's family is poor, and her husband's family is rich. Her wealthy wife is not easy to be.
She strives to play the role of a housewife. Whether it is conflicts with her husband or friction with her mother-in-law, she never breaks up, but uses her intelligence to please her husband and mother-in-law as much as possible.
At home, she often hides her tolerance and grievances. Only through hard work can this small family run smoothly.
But the good times didn't last long, and her husband began to become less obedient.
While he was worried that Ren Duomei had too much contact with the outside world, he wanted to refuse his junior sister who had a crush on him.
Finally, one time, the intimate behavior between her husband and her junior sister was seen by Ren Duomei. She directly slapped her husband in the face and angrily scolded her junior sister in front of her, giving the two a warning.
The husband woke up like a dream, broke off contact with his junior sister, and began to reexamine his wife.
But Ren Duomei no longer wants to compromise and be merciless. With her previous workplace experience and the help of her friends, she opened a beauty salon, transforming from a housewife to a boss.
She showed her strong side. Seeing this, her husband and mother-in-law changed her previous attitude. She felt more respect and kindness in her words, and she finally straightened her back.
Ren Duomei is one of countless full-time housewives, but she does not just feel wronged like most women, because she knows when to greet her with a smile and when to fight back with a domineering attitude.
As Cai Kangyong said: " I am not pursuing emotions without emotions, but pursuing appropriate emotions. "
Sometimes, blindly giving in may not necessarily achieve a broad sky, and being strong may not necessarily bring peace.
Because you are humble for a long time, you are easily wronged; if you are strong, your good luck will be gone.
Really powerful people have achieved "free temper": face different aspects of life, when you should be weak, when you should be strong, when you should be strong, when you should be strong.
Dress up your appearance with gentleness and arm your heart with firmness.
Only when the temper is elastic and tight, the hardness and softness can life be enjoyable.
Thinking is "elastic" and turns in time
The first-generation business tycoon Cao Dewang has suffered all the hardships of poverty since he was a child. He has achieved success and fame today because of his "elastic" mind.
Cao Dewang dropped out of school at the age of 14. His years of hard work in society have made him well versed in the flexible way of making money.
Locals sell for money by planting white fungus , but the profit of was lowered by the buyers, and in the end the villagers could not make much money. At this time, Cao Dewang learned that the prices in other provinces were several times more expensive than those in the local area.
He had a sudden inspiration and discovered a business opportunity.
He took out all his savings to buy local fungus , and then took it to other provinces to sell it.
net profit of two or three thousand yuan per trip. In this way, Cao Dewang, who was just starting out, made his first pot of gold in his life.
Later, he went around in circles and returned to his hometown to produce glass. As the business grows bigger and bigger, he plans to go abroad and expand his business to the United States.
But the road to entrepreneurship is not always smooth. Around 2000, domestic companies were generally suppressed abroad, and many companies were even forced to give up their foreign markets because of the United States suing for dumping.
The harsh overseas market environment made everyone think that Cao Dewang is going to return to China in a mess, but he just doesn’t follow the common sense: Why can only be led by others?
In order to protect his own interests, he directly sued the US Department of Commerce.
Finally, with his persistence and efforts, he won the lawsuit.
Looking at Cao Dewang's experience, it seems that there is no way out in every dilemma. In the face of this situation, ordinary people may have already collapsed and given up, but he can always find another way and find a turning point.
The fundamental reason is that is Cao Dewang's flexible thinking. He knows how to turn at the right time and is well aware of the wisdom of building roads when encountering mountains and building bridges when encountering water.
With this kind of thinking, any stumbling block in life will become insignificant.
As the saying goes: A straight road can run a horse, and a winding path can lead to secludedness.
But in life, there are always people who refuse to relax their thinking and just keep moving forward and give up when they hit the wall. In the end, it may just be a waste of time and consume themselves.
You should know that nothing is not only a solution. The flexibility of thinking lies in the fact that there is a straight path to go straight and the intersection where turns are turned.
Timely turning thinking is the "good medicine" to solve the problem.
Learn to abandon your stubbornness and give full play to the flexibility of your thinking. Perhaps the dark willows are at the corner not far away.
Life is "elastic" and has tension and relaxation
Murakami Haruki once said: "If you want time to become your friend, you must use your will to a certain extent to control time. This is my usual proposition."
He can become a famous writer because of his "elastic" control of life.
By chance, Haruki Murakami embarked on the road of writing. When he became a full-time writer, he devoted all his energy and effort to writing.
He buried his head in the desk from morning to night, relied on smoking to refresh himself when he was tired, and finally his fingers were smoked yellow.
But after a period of time, Haruki Murakami was a little collapsed because he found that writing without improving efficiency and quality through sleep did not improve his efficiency and quality. Instead, he was gradually overdrawn: he was sloppy, physical fitness decreased, and gained weight in figure...
He realized that writing was forced by time and busy with his hands was not a long-term solution. Too nervous and high pressure would not help writing.
So, he tried to split his day: get up at 4 a.m. and have coffee and breakfast, then start writing, writing 10 pages of manuscript paper every day.
The remaining time in the morning is used to exercise and deal with chores, and then have lunch around 12 o'clock, take a nap, and then move freely, listen to music or read, and have supper at 6 o'clock, and use it to relax and rest in the evening.
In this way, Haruki Murakami slowly found the key to balancing writing and life, and the writing path became smoother and smoother.
Locke has a famous saying: " Anyone who intends to make the most of any part of his life must make part of it for gaming and entertainment. "
As a study found that if a person spends a lot of time on a thing, the workload and output that is effectively completed on this day will not be as much as expected, and will even go from diminishing returns to negative returns.
This is why the standard working time of a day is 8 hours, because the working pressure of excessive load will only greatly reduce the efficiency.
In life, you must understand:
This string of life is like a pool of stagnant water without any tension, and if it is too tight, it is easy to split.
Balance is a kind of wisdom and a lubricant for life.
Faced with the "exercise book" of life, smart people have long given up the "sea of questions tactics" and choose to work hard to overcome the necessary levels while leaving blank space for life.
In the bustling hustle and bustle, try to enjoy the relaxed and relaxed feeling, and the natural desire comes one after another. The true meaning of life is nothing more than this.
at the end:
The wood is hard and broken when it is broken; the reeds are soft and have amazing toughness.
The way of elasticity is the law of survival of all things, and everyone should cultivate their own flexibility.
Temperament has elasticity and strength, be the master of your own emotions;
Thinking has elasticity and strength, and the wisdom of turning around;
Life has elasticity and strength, and tastes a life of relaxation and relaxation.
May you and I have spring-like elasticity, even if life changes rapidly, my heart will still be clear and free and easy.
Author Profile: Qingtian, a columnist of Fushu, a person of Fushu, a girl who loves words, hopes that his words can give you strength to the distant places. This article: Fushu, the best friend around you, Fushu launched a new book "Life Good" in 2018
