In the summer of 2016, I decided to seek psychological counseling. Because I realize that my sense of meaninglessness is getting stronger and stronger. Seeing the green leaves turning green and the cherry blossoms in full bloom, the mood will be very depressed. I feel that the beauty of the world has nothing to do with me. I can't suppress the growth of negative emotions, and my self-blame is also increasing.
Later, I read a book, " The Path Few People Walk " by Scott Parker. The many encouraging words in the book finally made me courage to ask for help.
At that time, the psychological counselor mainly used conversation to deal with my mental illness, but after a year and a half of psychological intervention, I still showed no signs of improvement. I gradually lost my confidence in treatment, so I gave up psychological counseling and turned to Started to help himself.
I started to read classic psychology works such as Freud's " Dream Analysis", Adler's "Beyond Inferiority Complex" and other classic psychology works. To solve my problem, I once believed that I was narcissistic, but it was useless.
I gradually realized that just reading and thinking seems to be unable to solve my problem.
I don’t know when, I gradually began to practice mindfulness meditation, keep a success diary, and write an emotional diary. The barriers I built started to loosen a bit, and my self-blame mindset gradually disappeared!
This does not mean that my problem has been solved, it is far from it, and I will still be terrified when others seem to be normal.
But I think I have touched the right way. Human feelings are very important. To overcome psychological problems, the effective way is to constantly feel and practice instead of just listening to some correct explanations. !
David Burns’s "The Smart Psychologist" puts a lot of emphasis on writing your feelings while watching, rather than saying "Oh yes, I understand!" after reading it, and from then on I practiced emotional diary for a while.
Looking back on my own experience, except for meditation, almost all are related to writing. I vaguely feel that writing does have a healing effect.
"Mind Writing" written by Bing Qianli, a well-known domestic psychological counselor, introduces how "writing" is healed. The so-called "spiritual writing" refers to ignoring the existing logic and moral standards, and only following the true inner writing method. "Mind Writing" explains in detail the miraculous effect of writing on the healing of mental illness. This book is an experience of Bing Qianli. Using writing as a tool, he has successfully cured many people, including himself.
It is introduced in the book that Bing Qianli loved little man books since he was a child, especially the pictures in it. He is as addicted as he is, and he has collected a total of 500 little man books. One day, his mother burned all his little books, and he said: At that moment, he would like to exchange his life for a rain. One can imagine how painful Bing Qianli's young heart was at that time.
And in the years that followed, Bing Qianli did not forget the stories in his villain book, one by one, one story after another, which filled Bing Qianli’s homework book. He kept writing and painting, but it melted. His mother's hatred healed his inner wounds. He is actually lucky. Most of us cannot heal ourselves.
小人书
Bing Qianli has healed many people based on the writing of the mind. He even commented on the patients he successfully managed: "What is it that healed her? It's mine. Profession, her sincerity, or our relationship? Undoubtedly, these are all, but there is another decisive factor-writing."
So, why does mind writing have such a big effect?
First, Bing Qianli emphasized that mind writing is not thinking, but an experience. It is different from thinking behaviors such as reasoning, explaining, and keeping a diary. Spiritual writing is uncontrollable, non-stop pen, and non-critical writing. Such writing often points directly to the heart.
Eckhart Tory pointed out more directly in " Current Power ",Our biggest problem is that we can’t stop thinking! Writing non-stop obviously gives us an opportunity to stop thinking and feel inside.
Rodin's "The Thinker" Paris, France
Second, thinking and confirmation are two different concepts, and writing it represents confirmation in the subconscious. If we are afraid of something, we will constantly self-suggest and exaggerate its image in our minds, but once written or drawn, it feels less terrible, because we have no room for imagination of fear.
There are many targeted writing methods in the book, I believe there will always be several pain points that will hit you.
1. The more specific you write, the easier it is to see your inner emotions
Zhu Ziqing's " 背影" is a classic in Chinese textbooks, including a description of a father climbing a moon platform to buy oranges for Zhu Ziqing. After watching it, people couldn't help crying. That paragraph was an objective description of details, and did not write "It is not easy for my father. He is so old and he is inconvenient to come to send me off. Why doesn't it make people cry to tears!" Such lyrical words, you can see the details. Contains emotions.
"Back View"
The same goes for Long Yingtai's "Watching", which is almost a line drawing of his father, but the feeling is immediately revealed.
So if you want to soothe your emotions, you must write specific details, and the more detailed the better, Bing Qianli believes that the reason why we can't write details is precisely because we are "away from the real thing for too long."
This is reminiscent of the method of mindfulness meditation. Perceiving things around you in sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch is the source of inner strength. This is similar to writing.
2. Grasp the passing thoughts
It is difficult to capture the feelings of a person, otherwise there will not be too much emotional accumulation and cause psychological problems. Emotions always come and go, no one will be nervous all the time,That's too much energy. However, after the emotional outburst, if you do writing again after a while, it will be greatly reduced, because it is very likely that the relaxed state is already difficult to grasp the feeling at that time.
This is the case when I keep my emotional diary. When I get home, I feel stable, and then record my feelings at that time. To be honest, when I record, I really don’t want to do this, so I can only write it forcibly. One paragraph, how can this be true? !
When your emotions come, prepare paper and pen, or cell phone, and immediately record your feelings and Lenovo . Go and write for a while. The practice time is long, and you will be able to learn from what you are writing. To find the source of the problem.
3. Write a letter to the deceased relative
I am opposed to this point, because I think this is a second injury to people! If you love your loved one, why can't you love it again? On the contrary, if we hate our loved ones, why can't we express our true thoughts?
As Bing Qianli said, it may be due to the sudden death of relatives that we have no time to say goodbye. Repression is a self-protection measure that people often take, which leads to our denial, dissociation of , , and division. We can write all the details of our departed relatives to do a farewell ceremony to comfort our shortcomings. However, Bing Qianli also gave the safe conditions for writing, otherwise the forced practice would really hurt people a second time.
This is just the tip of the iceberg of "Mind Writing", and it is also my pain point. We can completely use "Mind Writing" as a manual to find exercises at any time.
People often ask: I understand the truth, why do I still have a bad life? In fact, it’s nothing great to know a lot of truths. The hard part is to really experience, feel, practice, and truly write about yourself. That kind of life is not a hooligan.
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