The reader wrote to me and said:
My wife and I were high school classmates. At that time, my wife had a passionate teacher-student relationship with our Chinese teacher, but their relationship was ultimately not exchanged for the result of marriage due to many realistic reasons. My wife and I didn’t have much interaction in high school and college. But after we started working, there was a road between us at work, so my wife often made dinner with me. The result of our marriage should be that we fell in love over time.
Wife is a cheerful woman and more capable at work. The key is that her wife is particularly beautiful. Things I only knew after marriage: my wife doesn’t like men with a well-proportioned figure like me, but likes obese men with belly. My wife’s special hobby made me involuntarily remember her teacher-student relationship in high school: our Chinese teacher at that time was the kind of body my wife liked. At first, I thought my wife wanted me to gain weight because she was obsessed with our Chinese teacher. Later, my wife told me that she and our Chinese teacher no longer had any form of contact after our wife graduated from high school, and there was no such thing as obsessing at all. She just simply liked obsessed with men.
In this case, my wife often advised me to eat and drink. Even if I sometimes want to exercise, my wife will stop me. Under this circumstance, my weight has indeed increased quietly, and at the same time, I also felt that my wife is getting better and better with me. Or maybe once a person starts to gain weight, he will have a "lazy" attitude in life, which leads to the result: even if my wife does not stop me at the sports level, I am too lazy to move, and under my "spoiled", my appetite is getting bigger and bigger. The result: I have grown more than 40 kilograms of meat when I got married.
Because my wife treats me very well, I am also used to the current lifestyle of eating and drinking. But I have always had a doubt: Why did my wife ask me to be obese? I still can't understand my wife's special hobby.
Muzili Emotional analysis:
Everyone will experience some things during their growth, especially people's expectations for their partners are often related to their family and their first love experience. It’s like: some girls are spoiled by their parents during their growth, so when they choose a marriage partner, they want to find someone who can spoil themselves like their fathers; it’s like: some girls grow up in divorced families and have severely lacked their parents’ companions during their growth, which makes them tend to be inclined toward uncles when looking for a relationship partner, and they may think that uncles can not only give themselves love, but also give themselves fatherly love; it’s like: some people have a wonderful experience in a certain relationship. Although they can’t get the result of marriage, when choosing a marriage partner, they want to find someone similar to their ex, including the other person’s body shape.
In this era of thinness as beauty, most people have a perception of beauty: thin or well-proportioned figure, but some people like obese or strong people. For example, there was a period in the history of our country where women regard plumpness as beauty, that is Tang Dynasty . In fact, things like eye fate are really about the lover's eyes. For this reason, don't worry about how the lover's aesthetics are formed. As long as the two people live together after they can fulfill their aesthetics, they can live happily together. Of course, more people do not belong to the foreign trade association's cheating. After getting married, they do not have any special requirements for their lover's body shape, but rather value their lover's attitude towards themselves in their marriage life.
In fact, many people are of standard weight when they first get married, while women often make their figures become fat quietly because of having children and eating leftovers (not wanting to waste food); men have more social engagements and reduced their exercise habits, making their figures look fat in middle age. There is another factor that cannot be ignored: as people get older, their metabolism also decreases.Except for a few people from the appearance association, few people file for divorce from their lover because of their fat figure. I still want to remind everyone: between husband and wife, although visual effects are no longer the main element, they are also elements that cannot be ignored. If your lover has suggestions on your body shape, try to provide as much as possible.
From a health perspective, it is better for a person to have a good figure: at the diet, less oil and less salt; at the exercise level, you must have the habit of exercising. Of course, there is no need for everyone to live in the secular rules and regulations in their lives. As long as the couple feels that their relationship is more pleasant, it is the best attitude. When you find that your lover has some small habits during the marriage, as long as you do not violate the principles, please give your lover the little habits appropriately. There are all kinds of people in this world, and we need to accept some more abnormal hobbies. Only when couples can respond to each other in many things can their relationship develop in the direction of happiness.
Regarding the choice of a partner, each of us has our own rules and regulations, just like: some people are particularly unable to accept that their partner has a small belly; just like: some people have requirements for the length of their partner's hair. In fact, there is no need to use our cognition to tame them. Perhaps in your evaluation system, you are also a very excellent person, but in the eyes of some people, you are indeed not attractive. Regarding love, we often sigh like this: the people I like don’t like me; the people I like can’t like. Until one day, after you meet someone who is satisfied with each other and willing to fulfill each other, that is the love you should manage seriously. During this period, what you need to do is to fulfill each other and cherish each other.
A detail: At the beginning when your wife asked you to become fat, you were a little resistant, but in the process of you quietly becoming fat, you found that your wife was getting better and better to you, so you tasted the sweetness of becoming fat. At the same time, you became a little lazy in the process of becoming fat, but you got more love from your wife, so that you actually enjoy your current life. That being the case, don’t worry about why your wife likes you to be fat. In fact, during the years you and your wife have lived with you, your wife has given you loyalty to marriage. Since your current marital status makes you and your wife relatively satisfied, you just need to continue to be happy steadily. Some things are not easy to understand, so don’t continue to worry about.
Postscript:
In life, we will encounter this situation: one day, you start exercising because you feel that your state is wrong, or you think that your weight should be controlled. But after you lose weight, you will also hear different voices: you still look good when you are fat; now you are losing weight. Have you noticed that because the aesthetics of the people around you are different, they will give you different evaluations.
Regarding body management: Just follow your heart, or to fulfill your lover's aesthetics. As for how your relatives and friends around you view your body management, it doesn't matter at all. I have a friend who looks about 172 cm tall and weighs more than 200 kilograms. Many people around him advise him to lose weight, but he couldn't listen at all. He also knows that everyone is considering his health, but his position is: if a person cannot live with food in his life, it will be so boring.
(The picture is from the Internet, the picture is irrelevant)
