"Disciple Rules" says: "When people have shortcomings, don't expose them; when people have private interests, don't talk about them."
Everyone has self-respect, and no one wants their shortcomings, shortcomings and privacy to ruin others. Everyone knows. The only way to get along with others is to not pierce the last layer of window paper.
Knowing people without judging others, knowing things without making any noise, is the greatest kindness of a person, and it is also a manifestation of a person's high emotional intelligence.
01 Blind date with an infatuated man: My requirements for the woman’s appearance are very average.
The man with the hedgehog head in the picture is called Feng Lu (pseudonym). He is 34 years old and has a small career. He is currently mainly engaged in cement and river sand sales related businesses in Chongqing. , In addition, he also has two excavators pulling ore in Yunnan.
He grew up in Xinjiang and has been working and living in Chongqing for 10 years. Now he has bought a small two-bedroom house in Yubei District, Chongqing. The only thing missing from a life of having a car and a house is a mistress. , so he started his own blind date.
When it comes to his income, Feng Lu has always emphasized to the matchmaker that he must be low-key when introducing himself to female guests. Although his monthly income is more than 100,000 yuan, considering the losses, he said his monthly income is 10,000 yuan. That's almost enough.
Although Feng Lu repeatedly emphasized the principle of keeping a low profile with the matchmaker, he was not at all low-key when introducing his family situation. According to him, the person who is doing best in the family should be his sister, so when he introduced I spent more time introducing my sister than I did introducing myself. Feng Lu said that his sister has a wide range of business, ranging from medicines for hospitals and food for Jiangbei Airport to civil engineering and house decoration outside. She is involved in everything, and she can be regarded as a strong woman.
He leans against a big tree to enjoy the shade. Because he has such an outstanding sister, Feng Lu is so young that his river sand cement business is better than others. In addition, he can also drive a sports car to help his sister. He transports food and medicine, and sometimes helps at construction sites. He is a very down-to-earth young man.
Although Feng Lu is 34 years old this year, he has only had one relationship experience so far. As for the reason why he is still single, Feng Lu explained that he is a very emotional person. His ex was his junior high school classmate, and they have been together since He started falling in love when he was about 17 years old, but after more than five years of dating, his ex ended up with a rich man, and he never came out of it.
Talking about his criteria for choosing a spouse, Feng Lu said that because he is a warm-hearted man, he is quite disgusted with machismo. He hopes that the woman can have her own job and be financially independent, as long as the figure and appearance are acceptable.
Based on Feng Lu’s basic conditions, the matchmaker introduced him to 25-year-old Wang Yilan (pseudonym). Unlike Feng Lu, who grew up in Xinjiang, Wang Yilan is a native Chongqing girl who currently helps in her mother’s clothing store.
Before the blind date, Wang Yilan had a relationship experience. Because her ex-boyfriend was 2 years younger than her, he behaved naively, and they finally broke up. After learning from the past, Wang Yilan's first criterion for choosing a spouse is that the other person is older than herself.
02 They broke up after just a few words of chatting: Your figure is too flat
According to the basic conditions of the two, the matchmaker quickly arranged for the two to meet. Before the meeting, Feng Lu, who was attentive, also prepared a small surprise for the female guest in advance. They all sent milk tea, but Feng Lu directly sent a box of pure milk from a health perspective. As soon as they met, Feng Lu quickly took out a small carton of milk from the box, inserted the straw into it thoughtfully and handed it to the female guest.
Talking about their first impressions of each other, both the male and female guests said they were pretty good. Especially the male guest’s behavior of carrying a box of pure milk to the blind date made the female guests think he was honest and interesting.
Considering that it was already noon, Feng Lu, who calls himself a warm man, once again showed his gentlemanly demeanor and took the initiative to invite female guests to have lunch.
After sitting down, Feng Lu first handed over the initiative of ordering to the female guest. After the female guest ordered one tomato beef brisket , he added three more vegetarian dishes. Considering that Feng Lu’s friends were also eating together, the female guest The guests were worried that the portion of the 1 meat and 3 vegetarian dishes would be a bit small, while Feng Lu was worried that the price would be too high. Fortunately, the meal only cost 123 yuan, and he was finally relieved.
During the meal, it was the first time that the male and female guests had a formal conversation. However, Feng Lu, who had promised to keep a low profile, did not introduce himself first, but first told the female guest about his sister’s family’s business. Finally, he did not forget to emphasize My sister opened a mine in Yunnan, and I bought two cars and invested together.
Since the male guest’s family sounded pretty good, the female guest asked him about his house and car and other hardware conditions. As a result, Feng Lu said that his car was a transportation vehicle bought for tens of thousands of yuan three years ago. As for the car, and the house, considering that my sister would not compete with me since she was so rich, I wrote my mother’s name directly. Finally, in order to prove that he is a very low-key person, Feng Lu also emphasized that a car is enough for transportation. There is no need to buy an expensive one. The house is for people to live in, so there is no need to buy a big one.
When finally talking about savings, Feng Lu said that he had income every month anyway, so he didn’t worry too much about savings. It was basically at the level of moonshine, so naturally he didn’t save much money.
Although Feng Lu was 34 years old, the female guest did not see any plans for the future from his words and deeds, so she tentatively asked him what his plans were if he got married in the future. But he didn't know whether it was because the weather was too hot, making people irritable easily, or because the questions were too sharp, which made Feng Lu a little overwhelmed. He actually started to feel very angry and clamored to go home.
Seeing that the male guest suddenly couldn't sit still, the matchmaker hurried over to ask him what he thought. As a result, Feng Lu said mercilessly that the female guest was too thin, which he couldn't accept.
He obviously said before the blind date that he didn't care much about the woman's figure and appearance, but now after a few rounds, Feng Lu wanted to leave early because he disliked the female guest's figure. When the female guest heard that she was criticized by a man for being too flat in public, she was also very angry. She felt that the man was too disrespectful, so she directly stepped forward to question him.
A good blind date suddenly became so explosive that the matchmaker had no choice but to intervene. However, faced with the female guest’s questioning and the matchmaker’s persuasion, Feng Lu seemed to realize his mistake and quickly apologized to the female guest and explained He said that he wanted to leave because he didn't have a good rest last night and the weather was too hot, so he wanted to leave. Finally, before anyone could say anything else, Feng Lu left the matchmaker and female guests and left.
03 It is a basic skill not to evaluate people in public
Psychology expert Zhang Defen once said: "There is often a relationship between individuals that devour each other."
If you don't understand the principle of "one goes down and the other goes up", you don't increase it. With one's own defense power, one can only wait to be devoured by the other party. If necessary, raise the thorns all over your body so that those who want to harm you will not dare to come closer.
In this blind date, what the female guest did in the end was particularly great. As a man commenting in public that the woman’s figure is not plump enough, this is obviously an insult to the woman’s personality. If she endures it at this time, it may only make him more arrogant and will You are in a very passive position, and when you fight back hard, the other party will know that it is actually him who is at fault. Sometimes it is not the damage that makes you strong, but your tenacity in the face of the storm that makes you strong. Don't be weak when you should be tough.
Only he knew Feng Lu's family background and income, and only he knew the reason why he suddenly wanted to leave. Whether it is a blind date or making friends, the most basic thing for people to get along with is respect, and Feng Lu's last words and deeds obviously did not achieve this. Maybe he felt that he was just stating a fact, but he did not expect that his casual words would How much harm can be done to a girl.
"Desire Villa" said: "A soft tongue can break a person's muscles and bones, and words can sometimes hurt people more than violence."
If we comment on an action casually, it may be a sharp knife for the person involved. , heartbreaking.
Today’s topic discussion: What do you think of the performance of the male guests in today’s blind date?
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