The old man in front of the hospital bed called over and over again: "Wife, wake up! When we wake up, we will travel around the world together. Haven't you always wanted to do it?" My wife opened his eyes blankly, unconscious and unresponsive. The old gentleman sighed deeply. The

The old man in front of the hospital bed called over and over again: "Wife, wake up! When we wake up, we will travel around the world together. Haven't you always wanted to go?" My wife opened her eyes blankly, without consciousness or reaction. . The old gentleman sighed deeply.

The old couple have been married for forty years. When we first met, my wife originally planned to travel abroad, but she stayed because she loved him. In order to make up for the guilt in his heart, he promised: One day, I will accompany you around the world! However, as children were born one after another, financial pressure forced them to cut back on food and clothing, and traveling around the world became an unattainable dream. He always comforted his wife and said: When the children grow up a little bit, when the family becomes more affluent...the children finally grow up and each has his own family. They also have enough money to realize their dreams back then, but the man's career is at its peak, let alone traveling abroad, and the time they spend together is limited. Faced with his wife's silent complaints, he always said apologetically: When I retire, all my time will be yours, and you can do whatever you want! When it came time for him to retire, his wife couldn't wait any longer.

Parents' love is the purest. Thank you parents

A stroke caused a deep coma, and I was trapped in a world without dreams and desires day and night. The old man was left standing by the bed and kept repeating: Wife, you need to wake up quickly! I'll take you to Paris to see the Eiffel Tower, to the Netherlands to see the windmills, Rome ...

We all come here like this

Some people jokingly describe people's development, Before the age of thirty, it depends on academic qualifications, and by the age of forty It depends on seniority when you are young, and medical records after age 50. Most people in China spend the first half of their lives earning money through physical strength, and the second half of their lives use money to exchange for health. It sounds quite sad, but this is the bitter history of the heroes who created the domestic economic miracle, and it is also a portrayal of the parents of this generation entering their 60s.

My parents run a grocery store and breakfast. Of the three hundred and sixty-five days a year, only the first day of the Lunar New Year is considered as no business. Even so, that day is still busy saying goodbye and sorting out the things that have happened due to being too busy with the previous business. The "spring cleaning" that has not yet been completed, the Saturdays and Sundays that see green and red, are "good days" for school students to take a break and take a breather, but I have never felt this way, because for us, holidays are the opposite It was a big day, and the business was even busier. Although our parents occasionally cared for us and did not ask us to help, the atmosphere at home made people feel that it was a sin to stay up until eight o'clock. In their hearts, there seems to be no word for rest.

When I was a child, I occasionally complained to them in my naive way, why can’t we go anywhere like so-and-so? At this time, my parents would have good-sounding reasons to persuade or even hypnotize me. You need to make more money so that you can live a good life in the future! Don't always want to play, study more, and then you won't have to work so hard to make money like your parents! "My parents' understanding is now fully supported by my participation in activities or trips organized by the school to make up for the fact and accusation that they don't have time to take us out to play." But there is always a feeling of regret in my heart, a regret that I want to be close to my parents but can't. Seriousness is a common word of praise for others' good attitude. I intuitively think of my parents who are like supermen and robots who never need to take a break. However, I feel so uncomfortable with the word seriousness.

Only parents will continue to pay unconditionally

Until now, when I started working hard to make money, I slowly and deeply realized how arduous and embarrassing the task of balancing work and family is! The drama of the tug-of-war between work and family has never ceased since ancient times. My parents are still busy today, but their attitude toward their children has somewhat reversed to the same desire I had for my parents when I was a child. I hope to get more attention from them, care about my messages, and hope that I can go home often to chat with them.At this moment, I suddenly realized that I had to become "my parents' parent", which made me feel a little overwhelmed. I also began to understand that the meaning of adulthood is that you must start to be a caregiver; Get on the other side of taking care of others.

Listen to children’s expectations for their parents

A newlywed couple was busy decorating their new home and working hard for their new career. The son was carrying a large cardboard box, and it was difficult to see the blind spot behind the cardboard box. Inadvertently, the cardboard box touched the white porcelain bottle on the low cabinet. As he watched, the white porcelain bottle was about to flip forward in the limited air and fall to the ground... Here comes a jade stone. All broken. Soon after, the mother, who was over fifty years old, and her son, who was half a century old, noticed the tragic situation that was about to happen. The mother took a step forward and performed the stunt of fishing for the moon in the water, and turned the porcelain bottle over twice and a half times. Pick it up easily, but the young son is still one step away with a heartbeat of 130 and making a rescue gesture...

This is a very creative advertisement on TV, a healthy and happy mother, and a pair of happy entrepreneurial young couples who are working hard for their future. . What will this kind of parent-child interaction touch upon? Most parents like good children who are well-behaved, filial, healthy, happy, and don't need to worry about, and they subtly request or shape such children. However, parents often forget to listen to their children's expectations of their role as parents. Reflect on yourself, even if you are a parent, you will have expectations for your parents. Try taking out a piece of paper and writing down ten expectations for your parents. See what you, as a parent, have accomplished now?

There will be some individual differences, but there are also commonalities. Children usually look forward to having parents who are sensible, warm, encouraging, and supportive. They also hope that their parents will be healthy, happy, and do not need to worry. You will find that there are similarities in the expectations between parents and children. That is because true care, which is blood thicker than water, is an endless emotional connection. Sometimes we put too much emphasis on parents to know effective parenting, but neglect to tell parents how to take care of themselves so that their children can fulfill their own wishes more safely without worrying them.

The Chinese place special emphasis on the connection and importance of family. Psychology experts tell us that only by allowing parents and children to have close care and connection, and at the same time allowing each other to have spiritual independence and freedom, will a healthy family be possible. In addition to the traditional "obligations" of parents to take care of their children and help them get married and have children, it seems that they also have the task of "taking good care of themselves" which has never been mentioned.

Parents’ self-love and care

For elderly parents, when filing taxes or dividing property, it is as valuable as a basketball, and their children are all rushing to get it; when it comes to monthly support, it is like a volleyball, and they can’t wait for the next month to arrive as soon as possible; When you are sick and bedridden, you will abandon football like football. There will be many reasons to be busy in your originally not busy life. The above exclamations reveal the sadness and embarrassment of today's parents!

The traditional concept of raising children for old age has been repeatedly impacted by contemporary values. Many new generation parents who have studied in the United States, absorbed Western knowledge, and emphasized cultivating children to be independent, have gone through the stage of equal and good parent-child interaction, but when they reach the empty nest period, they are The sentiments of Chinese parents are still in his blood.

After the child left, I realized that the thoughts of parents' kindness and children's repayment that I had always ignored couldn't help but come up; especially when a person gets sick and the two parents have to take care of themselves, they can't help but want their children to go home, but I can't speak. So says an elderly father who uses Western parenting methods to teach his children to be independent.

The so-called self-love and care is like what we often call loving yourself. To put it simply, what is the so-called loving yourself? It means "do what you like; refuse to do what you don't like." But the premise is to know what you want to do and what you don’t want to do.

As parents, we have spent most of our lives fighting for the needs of our children; when children grow up and become less and less needy of their parents, parents often suddenly feel a sense of loss of not being needed. I often hear that your wings are stiff and you want to fly! The exclamation reflects the parents’ inner cry of not being needed or even respected! But think about it from another perspective, when a child is focused on developing his own future, why should he bear to hinder his development? Isn't his independence what you deliberately wanted him to be? But who will satisfy their needs? The most convenient candidate is of course yourself!

No matter how old your parents are, they are still your last shoulder to fight in society

The decline of physical strength and energy is a necessary process of human development. One day we will all be old, and then we may also need someone who can listen patiently to us when we talk about our old age. Tell us stories, help us support us, even feed us, make us happy, etc. But if we don’t say it out loud, it’s hard for others to know what we want. Instead of constantly testing whether the other party has guessed your feelings correctly, making it confusing and unhappy (because the chance of guessing right is really very small), it is better to express your expectations appropriately and consider what the child can handle, so that Children have a "filial" direction to follow.

A primary school teacher whom I have always respected shared his thoughts on how to ask for birthday gifts from his children, which was quite interesting. She changed her past repressive mode of asking her children to discover it automatically, and then secretly expecting surprises. She clearly expressed to her children what she needed most now. This new attempt made her feel taken care of, and at the same time satisfied her children. Want to express filial piety. In this way, she will never feel overwhelmed after receiving impractical but loving gifts.

As a parent, you need to make some plans for your simple role. Money can't buy you if you already know it, but you have no choice but to not expect it. If you know it in advance, it's better to plan in advance! Think about what you have been complaining about not having the chance to do, write it down, and try to put it into the urgent, not urgent; important, unimportant task processing quadrants to find out the priority order for completion. Get up now and execute the dream you most want to accomplish but haven’t yet accomplished. Otherwise, he will be the protagonist in "Love Too Late", complaining all the time that there is no chance of achieving it.

In addition, it is said that young couples stay together for a long time. When the children grow up and the role of parents fades away, the role of husband and wife gradually becomes more prominent. There are no children around, but there is a wife, so it is very important to cultivate common interests with the other half, such as swimming, Tai Chi , planting flowers and grass, even calligraphy, volunteering and other dynamic and static activities. Highly recommended. It’s not about what to do, but what you two want to do together.