Dear daughter:
Dad is very touched when he saw something on the Internet.
The young couple had a conflict. When the mother-in-law learned of it, she called out her son alone. The daughter-in-law followed, and when she heard the conversation between the two, she burst into tears.
It turned out that the mother-in-law took her son aside and called him aloud. Knowing that her daughter-in-law was so angry that she didn't eat any food, the mother-in-law even picked up the rolling pin and greeted her son.
While the son was beating, he cooked for the daughter-in-law without saying a word.
Seeing this, I was suddenly touched. Although you are still young, watching you grow up day by day, I understand that the day you get married and have children will always come.
Marriage is really not as simple as getting a certificate to hold a wedding for a person. It will determine a person's fate again.
How dad hope that the baby I hold in my hand will be able to marry a happy family in the future and have a happy life.
Why does dad say that he is married to a "ruyi family" instead of a "ruyi Langjun"?
Marriage is not a matter of two people, but a collision of two families. You enter another family, not only to get along with your future husband, but also with his family.
And, your husband, his character and morality, are not grown overnight, but shaped by his native family for decades. In other words, what you have to accept is not only a flimsy person, but also his native family.
There is a line in the TV series " Our Marriage ". Dad agrees:
Marriage is not the same as love.There are only two people in love, one world. But there are many people in marriage, the whole world.
Love is lost and you can start all over again, but marriage is difficult. So Dad would like to give you advice in advance: If you get married in the future, please find these 3 types of families.
One: Family with Three Views
You often ask me: "What is Three Views ?"
This topic is too broad, and it is difficult for Dad to explain it clearly to you. But I hope you can keep these "three views" in mind:
① "money view"
Our family is in an ordinary family, and I don't have to worry about someone coming for money in the future. Of course, if you have outstanding abilities in the future, dad will be very pleased.
I just saw things like Ms. Lai from Hangzhou and the pregnant woman who fell from a cliff in Thailand. I hope that when you choose a family in the future, you must look at the other person's outlook on money.
If boys are from average family, but they are positive and optimistic, work diligently and down to earth. Even if he is a poor boy, Dad agrees. Because of his optimistic attitude and down-to-earth spirit, he will be able to seize the counterattack when opportunities come.
If the other party has a wealthy family, but they care about it, the word "profit" will take the lead. Then I advise you not to go to such a family. Many girls think that they will be happy if they enter a "rich family", but they don't know that if marries into such a family, apart from being wronged, they will not be happy at all.
②"Marriage View"
I have seen many boys, they are cheerful,He is sincere, kind-hearted, and knows how to love and respect women. When you grow up, observe these boys and you will find that the parents behind him are all very loving without exception.
The family is just a mirror, and the children will be like the parents.
I have seen what true love is, I have seen my father love and respect my mother, I have seen husbands and wives living in peace, so that the children who grow up in the family will love and respect themselves in their marriage wife.
③"View on doing things"
The child's first teacher, and the best teacher, is the parent.
A person's character, conduct, attitude towards others, and way of handling things are all hidden in his native family. If you want to get to know a person more deeply, then go see his parents.
If parents are kind and can take responsibility, then the child is likely to be a kind-hearted and responsible person. If the parents are profiteering, cunning and treacherous, the children will likely be similar.
Believe that a good husband is never "tuned". He must have these excellent qualities in his bones to know how to be gentle with others.
Dad hopes that when you choose marriage in the future, you must take a look at the "three views" of the other's family.
Two: A family that does not patriarchal
When you were raised in the palm of your hand by your father, naturally you don’t know what “patriarchal” means.
Dad hopes that you will start a family in the future. Don't get over your head and ignore it for love. must look at the other's family, whether it is patriarchal.
I saw one thing before,Dad is really sad.
Because of despair of life, a 29-year-old mother in Hefei jumped down from the stairs with a son and a daughter. The mother-in-law's family rushed to the hospital, leaving their mother and daughter aside, only holding their son and sent to the hospital.
But unfortunately, the son was not saved.
You ask why my mother is so decisive, she doesn't want to live, she has to take her own child?
If you understand the experience of this mother during her lifetime, you may have more sympathy for her.
When she gave birth to her first daughter, she was rejected by her mother-in-law because of her congenital ear disease. 's in-laws didn't help, she had to quit her job for her daughter and become a full-time mother.
After giving birth to his son, the child became frail and sick again. It costs money to treat children, eat and wear at home. She had no job, no financial resources, and was scolded by her in-laws for nothing. She only knew how to spend her husband's money.
Her husband is not considerate, her husband's family is indifferent and unfeeling, and patriarchal, she has come to a desperate situation.
In a patriarchal family, it is difficult for you to control your own life initiative. It’s okay if you are giving birth to a boy, you don’t need to worry over and over again, and you don’t need to constantly experience the pain of having a child.
But if you give birth to a girl, not only will you be blinded, but also your children will make it difficult to live a carefree life.
This kind of unreasonable, patriarchal family, even if you love it again, I advise you not to go.
So, before you get married in the future, you must ask the boys' minds and understand the other's family's minds. If the other party cherishes boys and girls as much, then such a family can choose.
Three: Family that does not count
Dad saw a girl post on the Internet:
She and her boyfriend are in love,Once I overheard her boyfriend calling his mother, her mother said on the other end: "If you really identify her, let her get pregnant as soon as possible. This way we have the initiative and we can negotiate terms when we get married. "
When the girl heard this, she felt a chill in her back and broke up with her boyfriend.
boyfriend explained: "Even if my mother said that, I wouldn't do that." The girl smiled and refused: "Forget it, I can't beat your mother."
started to suffer even before entering the door. , Regard you as a commodity that can be clearly marked, and calculate how to "depreciate" you. In such a family, you are weak and can't compete with others. You can only be wronged when you marry.
I hope that the family you choose in the future can be simpler and simpler for the other party. There are not so many twists and turns, not so much careful thinking, not so much calculation and stumbling.
Child, when you grow up, Dad hopes you can remember these words I told you.
Qian Zhongshu said: "Marriage is a siege."
Good marriage, it is your castle against wind and rain. Not a good marriage, it is a siege that brings you wind and rain.
To choose a person as a life-long partner, you must visit his family and his parents. Three For families that are upright, do not favor boys and girls, and do not count, then feel free to marry.
But if the other party is not like this, please stop the loss in time. No matter how old you are, no matter how much you love, get out and stay away from them.
[The picture comes from the Internet, invaded and deleted]
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