What should I do if my child is lonely at school without friends? This is the most common problem that parents encounter and is also a problem that parents are likely to ignore.
What would you do if your child told you that he had no friends in school? Perhaps most parents will say to their children: You take the initiative to go and play with your children. Only when you take the initiative to find children to play with them will the children be willing to play with you.
So in most cases, we all think that children have no friends in school, which is because children do not take the initiative to talk to classmates, do not take the initiative to play with classmates, and some parents even label their children as "introverted, not talkative" to make excuses for children to have no friends.
never thought about the real reason.
Why do children feel lonely and have no friends in school? In fact, it can be divided into several situations:
The first situation: the child has a bad personality and cannot get along with his classmates
Children are more favored at home and have to do everything according to their own wishes. But in school, so many students each have their own ideas, and it is impossible to follow the children's wishes.
If the child has a bad personality and always has conflicts with his classmates over trivial matters, then the child’s image in the class will be affected, and the classmates may be alienated from the child and do not like to play with the child. After all, no one wants to coax others all the time, and it’s wrong for yourself.
The second situation: the child and the classmates cannot find a common topic
This situation means that parents are more concerned about their children and do not let the children do many things, resulting in the child and the classmates having no common topics.
For example, don’t let your children watch cartoons, when students talk about an animation character, the child will not be able to interfere, and they will be criticized by their classmates, "Why don’t you know anything?"
For example, students all play a game, the child has never played it, when students discuss it enthusiastically, the child can only be an audience member, and they will be ridiculed by their classmates, "You have never played this game"
For example, students all show off where they went to play during the holidays, what good things they ate, what good toys they bought, etc., but the child has been kept at home and has no chance to go out. Then when students talk, the child is not only envious, but also wronged.
has no common topics, and children cannot integrate into the circle of classmates, so they will be isolated and have no friends.
The third situation: parents are stronger
Some parents always cannot see their children being wronged, and even if the students are unintentionally fighting, they can find the other parents' theory. Parents seem to be strong and not easy to mess with, so in order to "it is better to do less than more", other parents will remind their children to play less with the child to avoid unnecessary trouble.
students will consciously keep a distance from their children.
So, children are lonely and have no friends in school, and the responsibility of parents cannot be shirked.
After all, school is an environment that children must adapt to in their growth, and they must spend the most critical periods in their lives in school. Children should deal with classmates, learn to integrate into the collective, and make friends, so that their children's school life will be happy.
How can I make my child change this state in school?
This starts with us parents, and we parents need to make changes first.
For example, The child has a bad personality and cannot get along with his classmates. We can take the child to read more related books or read some short stories to let the child see the impact of bad temper on himself. If you want to gain friendship between classmates, you have to change your bad temper.
We can also use scenes in life to let children feel the impact of bad temper, help children realize the harm of their bad temper to their classmates, gradually guide and help children to change their temper, and be a friendly and easy-to-get-a-lifetime child.
For example, Children always cannot find common topics with their classmates, so we must create opportunities for children.Although learning is the first priority as students, we must also cultivate children's hobbies. Appropriate relaxation and rest can make children more efficient when studying.
So, we can meet the children's small requirements, let the children find topics they are interested in, and support them. I remember that when my child was a child, I especially liked to collect Ultraman cards. He said that many students in their class have card books and could put Ultraman cards in the card books. After listening to it, I bought him a card book and some Ultraman cards. The child was very happy and would share with me about his discussion of Ultraman with his classmates at school.
We can also take our children out for fun, have a big meal, play a game, etc., and these will become the stepping stone for children to make friends, so that children can have topics to chat with their classmates and better integrate into the classmates' circle.
For example, The strength of parents affects children to make friends. There was a parent in the child's class who often tagged other parents in the class group. Either there were a few ink stains on his child's clothes, or the child's pen disappeared, or another classmate accidentally hit him, and the two children quarreled for a few words. This parent has to ask others to apologize to him, as if no one can mess with his children.
As a result, most of the children in the class stopped talking to their children.
So when we parents deal with their children's problems, we must grasp the right measure. Sometimes the conflicts between children are not really conflicts, and children can handle them themselves. We can protect our children for a while, but we cannot protect them for a lifetime. Children must eventually learn to face and solve problems by themselves.
When a child encounters problems at school, we can ask the child, but don’t rush to make decisions for the child and stand up for the child. If it is a small matter, let the child solve it himself.
Friends are important partners in children's lives and are also indispensable mentors and friends. When the child says he is lonely and has no friends at school, we parents must pay attention.
