Dear daughter, I had insomnia last night.
lying in bed, tossing and turning all night, and not being allowed to fall asleep.
Before going to bed, you send me a link. The message
made me watch the TV and I was drowsy and suddenly woke up.
Because what you sent me was Beijing Normal University Teacher Wang Zhenyao, who spoke at a special seminar.
He said that more than 94% of the elderly in China retire and are still raising their grandchildren.
The elderly in rural areas insist on farming, while the elderly in cities are keen on cooking and doing housework.
Mother and daughter have a sex, and I instantly understood what you think.
Then, you sent me a voice, and your tone was full of guilt: "Mom, I really can't hold on anymore, can you help me?"
At that moment, I suddenly felt a sense of indescribable heartache.
Mom knows that you have always been a strong and independent child.
From childhood to adulthood, I almost never worried about it.
Even if you have difficulties outside and suffer grievances, every time you call back, you will be "reporting good news but not bad news."
When you send me this link, you must have mustered up a lot of courage.
My mother felt bad when she saw it.
After a night of repeated thinking, I decided to write this letter to you and tell you all my thoughts.
Source: Panoramic Vision
Daughter, I remembered that before you got married, my mother and daughter were sitting on the sofa chatting.
is playing a CCTV documentary "Grandma" on TV. The grandma under the lens of
is an "old migrant family".
You have to get up at less than 6 o'clock in the morning to go to the vegetable market to buy groceries.
Clean, cook, walk the baby... like a gyro, spinning all day.
My daughter and son-in-law come home from get off work, and they lie on the bed and play with their phones, waiting for the meal to start.
Grandma, who has worked hard for a day, doesn’t even have time to take a breath.
In order not to disturb their rest, you have to pay attention to your children while preparing supper.
Even so, sometimes she is not understood by her daughter when it comes to the child’s education. Among them, there are many young parents who just care about their childbirth and care about their raising.
There is always only one sentence for children, "Study hard".
does not care about the growth of children, nor does it understand their preferences.
They think that they have given the child to the elderly, so they just need to be a hand-off boss.
Even some parents even allow the elderly to supplement their children's daily expenses, and they think it is natural.
The elderly contributed their efforts and endured the hard work while complaining.
This is a true portrayal of most elderly people raising children.
In fact, after retirement, who doesn’t want to sing and dance every day, plant flowers and walk birds?
But in order to make their children easier, they chose to leave their hometown.
No acquaintances, no interest, and no life of your own.
Source: Panoramic Vision
After you finished reading it, you swear to me and said to me:
"These children are too unfilial! Mom, don't worry, when you get old, I will definitely not let you take care of your children!"
I told you half-jokingly and half-seriously:
"Raising you is my duty, and you have to take responsibility for your children.Besides, I have been busy for most of my life, and when I get old, I have to seize the tail of time and be willful once. "
Nowadays, the words are still in my ears.
Your "break of your promise" makes my mother feel as uncomfortable as a knife.
This feeling of distress is not for me, but for you.
Mom is a experienced person.
I know very well that taking care of children is never an easy thing, especially for women People.
A few days ago, my mother saw a video online.
The video is a young mother, who looks about the same age as you.
In just a few minutes, she is busy at home.
Clean up the house and prepare supper later.
1 The whole person is unkempt and has no time to take care of herself.
And her young child sticks to her no matter what she is doing.
But she was too tired and only ate one meal after a day.
Plus she suffered from tendonitis , and her hands couldn't use any strength.
Finally, she was out of control of her emotions, squatting in the living room and bursting into tears.
HD. The child next to l1 had no idea what was going on.
Source: Panoramic Vision
Just got close to her over and over again, trying to hug her mother, even if the mother pushed herself away again and again.
After she got angry at the child, she soon regretted:
"I pushed her like this, and she kept holding me and comforting me. Afterwards, she beat myself several times but couldn't relieve herself. She is so young and doesn't know anything, and she still has to bear my bad temper. "
Under this video, many people said they were crying.
Someone blamed himself:
I also vented to my child because I was in a bad mood. He cried aggrievedly, and still hugged me and kept calling me my mother.
actually has something to do with him? He was not wrong at all. I vented to him just because I knew he couldn't live without me.
Someone comforted:
it doesn't matter. It's not easy to be a mother, and they are in a bad mood.
After that, it will be a little dirty. If you don’t want to cook, eat takeaway. Don’t make yourself too tired. Hug you.
Someone else collapsed:
At this time, I really hope someone can help.
I am married far away, my mother is not around, I don’t have a mother-in-law, and my husband can’t help. I am really about to be unable to stand it!
After putting down my phone, my mother couldn’t help it.
Because of this girl, I look so much like you!
Hitt! ml1 After graduating from college, you chose to marry far away because of love.
Originally you planned to spend your honeymoon and find a job.
The arrival of a funny smile disrupted your plan.
But you are very happy Happy.
You like children since childhood. You have always been the king of children in the family compound.
Unexpectedly, after Xiaoxiao was born, your "disaster" came.
Xiaoxiao was born with a weak body, unable to live without people, sleep I often wake up from my mind.
You can only coax him and hold him, and you will be hugged for a night.
Source: Panoramic Vision
You don't I have a mother-in-law and my son-in-law's work is in the rising period and I need to work overtime frequently.
Occasionally get off work early. He feels sorry that it is not easy for you to take care of your baby, and he will volunteer to feed Xiaoxiao to you.
But he is too tired, and sometimes he is holding a bottle in his hand, and the person is already snoring on the sofa.
You took this scene at that time and posted it on your Moments and said with emotion:
"It is not easy to have a baby, but it is even more difficult to take care of a baby. A villain can easily knock down two adults."
Despite this, you have never thought of giving the child to the nanny for care.
As soon as I come, I feel that the child still has to be watched by his own people before he can feel at ease.
Secondly, you are also trying to make up for your childhood self.
Your dad left early, and we, mother and daughter, have been dependent on each other for life.
When you were a child, I was sometimes too busy to be busy and could only entrust you to Aunt Lin next door.
Aunt Lin treats people kindly, but you are sensitive by nature. always feel that no matter how good other people's family is, they are not in their own home after all.
Perhaps because you once lived under someone's roof, you insisted on taking care of Xiaoxiao.
Later, when Xiaoxiao was over two years old, you found a good job.
has a high salary, but it is very strong, and you have to travel from business to business from time to time.
Home and work, children and career.
One hand of family affection and the other hand of responsibility, you can't let go of both sides.
After a long time, you will inevitably be unable to get rid of your clones.
And Xiaoxiao has reached the age of going to kindergarten, and the pick-up and drop-off of children and education have become the top priority.
After three years of hard work, you can finally not hold on.
Source: Panoramic Vision
Someone said: "In this world, all parents who do not want to aggrieved their children are wronging themselves."
You smiled and of course mom felt sorry for you.
Now, you choose to bow to reality and speak to me.
Mom knows your difficulties, your grievances, and your concerns.
So, mom can help you take care of your children.
You don’t have to feel sorry or feel guilty about me, because my mother will make two requests:
First, money support.
You can give your mother a child care fee every month.
My mother thinks she is still in good health. When you are at work, she can help you clean housework, wash clothes and clean.
Moreover, my mother is also a professor. Even if she retires, she is still more than enough to provide tutoring Xiaoxiao. You can give the money to
, and you will be very at ease with it. Mom will be well deserved.
, emotional support.
Mom helps you take care of your children, which does not mean that you and your son-in-law can let go.
Children only grow up once, don’t be absent in Xiaoxiao’s life and leave yourself regrets.
Mom hopes that no matter how busy you work, you will have to take time every week to put down your phone, and sit down and eat and talk.
Listen to your mother’s nagging and listen to Xiaoxiao’s thoughts.
plays games with Xiaoxiao and helps mom wash dishes.
Source: Panoramic Vision
There is a line in the movie " No Questions about the West and East " that says this:
"Don't be afraid, I am the one who provides you with the bottom line. I will fall down with you. No matter how deep you fall, I am not afraid of anything, just afraid of pushing me away when you fall."
Dear daughter, mom is willing to be your confidence to move forward and your retreat in life.
Don't be afraid, don't worry.
Because, I will always stand shoulder to shoulder with you.
love your mom.
Author: Qiao Mu.Source: Chinese Studies Yishi (ID: guoxueyike), share Chinese Studies classics and appreciate classical culture.
