text丨The West Chamber of affection
Time has not been long, I hope you will meet in my words!
Many women believe that after marriage it is a world of two people and their husbands, and there is no disturbance from others.
But in fact, after getting married, you not only have to face your lover, but also accept that your in-laws who are not related to you become your family.
Most mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflicts come from this, because the only bond between the two is men. Once a man fails to balance the relationship well in the middle, the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will continue to arise.
Although in reality, the majority of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not in harmony, there are still some women with very harmonious relationships with their mother-in-law. So, these three details are the key to whether the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are good.
1. See if the mother-in-law evaluates you in front of outsiders, will she protect you
Some mother-in-law always show a good side to get along at home, and seems to completely treat you as a part of the family, but outside, she complains about you with relatives and friends in various ways, and asks everyone around you to wear tinted glasses.
Mrs. Lin’s mother-in-law is a "two-faced person". She never quarrels with Mrs. Lin when she is at home and always praises her in all kinds of ways.
However, as long as you get together with your relatives and friends, the mother-in-law scolds Mrs. Lin to be worthless, as if she is just a woman who can't get on the table.
At first, Mrs. Lin had no idea, but later everyone around her began to point fingers at her. After Mrs. Lin asked, she realized that the initiator of all this was her mother-in-law.
So, since then, there has been no good expression between Mrs. Lin and her mother-in-law.
Whether the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not only depends on the relationship between you in private, but also on the mother-in-law's evaluation of you outside.
If a mother-in-law completely treats her daughter-in-law as her own person, then she will try her best to protect her daughter-in-law outside, rather than deliberately arrange it.
Therefore, if you want to know what the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is clear when you look at the mother-in-law's evaluation of the daughter-in-law outside.
2. See if the mother-in-law will help you when your husband and wife are in trouble
Live together. If you are full of too many calculations and thoughts, life will only get worse and worse.
Mrs. Chen has been living a very happy life since she got married. Although her salary and her husband are not too high, their family atmosphere is very good.
Last year Mrs. Chen gave birth to a child. The couple planned to buy a house in the city, but after emptied their savings, they could only pay the down payment.
At this time, the mother-in-law took out 200,000 yuan to subsidize Mrs. Chen and his wife without saying a word.
Mrs. Chen was surprised at that time. Her mother-in-law usually lives very frugal and will not interfere with the trivial matters at home. Unexpectedly, she did not hesitate to help this time.
Mrs. Chen believes that having such a mother-in-law is simply a woman’s luck. Because in real life, most parents-in-law even want to try their best to squeeze their sons and daughters-in-law.
So Mrs. Chen feels that she must treat her mother-in-law as her biological mother, otherwise she will be sorry for her sincere efforts.
In fact, most of the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in life come from the mother-in-law's stinginess and daughter-in-law's concern. As long as one of the two parties is willing to take the initiative to accept it, the relationship will be much more eased.
Therefore, in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, whether the two love each other or kill each other depends on whether the mother-in-law is willing to help in the financial aspects, or whether she is willing to provide help in life.
3. See if the mother-in-law will interfere with the conflict between you and your wife.
Mrs. Xie believes that the least thing a qualified mother-in-law should do is to participate in the conflict between her son and daughter-in-law. Because it was originally a very small thing, but as long as my mother-in-law got involved, the ending would be completely different.
Mrs. Xie likes her mother-in-law very much. The reason is very simple. The mother-in-law almost never deliberately favors her son. Every time Mrs. Xie quarrels with her husband, the mother-in-law will persuade her very rationally.
or even, most of the time, the mother-in-law will take the initiative to stand on Mrs. Xie’s side.
This small action made Mrs. Xie feel very warm because she was married far away and was always worried that she would have no place to talk about her if she was wronged.
And mother-in-law's approach just filled her anxiety, making Mrs. Xie have a deeper sense of belonging to this family.
If in a family, the mother-in-law will only be stubborn and everything will put the blame on the daughter-in-law, then this will indirectly lead to the dissonance of the relationship between the son and daughter-in-law.
So, whether the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good depends on the conflict and what the mother-in-law will do.
Conclusion:
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship is a very important relationship in a husband-and-wife relationship. Once there are many conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the husband-and-wife relationship will be greatly affected.
Many women don’t know how to judge their relationship with their mother-in-law after getting married. In fact, these three details can help you distinguish well by appealing.
Because, mother-in-law is sincerely good to you, in your husband and wife's life, she will only do her best to help and completely regard you as her own person.
She will not regard herself as an elder, and she must take the dominance of everything and frequently provoke the relationship between you and your wife.
If you meet a good mother-in-law, then cherish it and know how to give her a sincere response, so that she will treat you twice as well.
