Author/Chiyu
I deeply realize one thing: those principles that have been emphasized over and over again are always impossible to do the same.
Some things are simple to say, and everyone understands it.
is like those around me who have never been in love before. They can tell some big truths. They can be said to be very knowledgeable, just like an emotional expert, but in the end when they are in love, they still have no pitfalls that they should have fallen.
The thing I remember most is the insight of a good friend of mine.
She didn't talk about her first love in her life until she was 27 years old. One night, she sent me a message: I used to despise those who couldn't get out of love and asked the other party not to leave. I felt that they were useless and had no courage at all.
The next sentence is: I finally understand them completely now.
I caught something wrong from her words and asked quickly: What are you doing?
She replied: It’s nothing, I just missed him very much, and couldn’t help it, so I sent him a message.
I said: Didn’t you delete him?
She said: It was deleted, so I remembered his number when I sent a text message.
Just two days before she said this to me, she said in front of me with great confidence: "I really won't look for him again this time. I feel that he doesn't love me at all, nor do I care about me. I have always paid a lot. Look at the few days when we have broken off the connection, if I don't look for him, he won't look for me either. I'm not bad, why should I hang myself on this tree?"
I followed her words and said that you should have been like this for a long time.
Next, she talked about many bad things for boys in front of me, saying that she should not continue to be with him, and he was not worthy of himself at all.
I had guessed that her emotions might be repeated, but I still couldn't bear to break her fantasy. Some things have to be experienced by myself before I really understand them.
As expected, in the middle of the night two days later, she looked for me again and said that she still missed him. She couldn't help but send him a message and said a lot. After writing, she felt very uncomfortable and wanted to find someone to talk to, so she thought that I might not have slept yet, so she came to me.
, and she received no reply from the text message she sent to the boy.
In fact, this is not something like this anymore. The reason why she deleted the boy’s WeChat and decided to separate was because the boy always refused to reply to her messages.
Boys have many reasons, they are busy and forget, sometimes they say that they don’t look at their phones, etc. Anyway, waiting for their reply is often a cycle of reincarnation. Sometimes she has to wait for a long time, sometimes she has to wait for one or even two days.
The boy completely ignored her feelings. He only replied to her message when he wanted to talk to her. Other times when she sent messages, it was always a sank to the sea.
While she warned herself not to be so humble, she was still constantly replying to his messages, waiting for his reply as much as the stars and the moon.
This is equivalent to a kind of forgiveness.
So, from waiting for the reply to the message, there was a huge gap in their status. It was obvious that the boy took the initiative to chase her at first, but in the end she was the one who couldn't live without and was at a disadvantage.
She is also always guessing: What exactly is he thinking? In the days when he didn't reply to the news, did he feel uncomfortable? Didn't he really miss me?
According to her usual rationality in life, she should have had an answer long ago, but when she really faces love but cannot, she will still deceive herself and use her own ideas to assume the behavior of boys.
For example, she thought that a boy would not contact her, but in fact she was holding on, just as she was holding on to him, just as she was holding on to him - on the one hand, she clearly wanted to find him and talk to him, but on the other hand, she was also afraid that her excessive initiative would make everything worse, so she could only speculate alone.
And I told her that she was thinking too much.
Men should not contact you. There is often only one truth in everything: He did not think of you.
or in other words, your existence is not enough to arouse the other person's longing, or any emotion - as long as he really misses you a little, he will definitely look for you, or you have some status in his heart, and he will not be cold to you. Even though you are waiting for his news, he still pretends not to see it.
In fact, when a person starts to ignore your news, not only does he feel as simple as you, but also the most critical point: His subconscious mind has already looked down on you a little, so his respect for you begins to weaken. The direct reason for this result is generally that you show love too obvious, or you have done things to lower your principles in front of him, so under this premise, the other party will continue to test where your bottom line is and will step by step disrespect your needs.
until you make a corresponding counterattack afterwards.
Therefore, in any relationship, you must learn to see the essence through phenomena. You can temporarily not want to wake up and live in the dreams you weave, but you cannot keep going like this. Only those who can stop loss of in time can often reap the ultimate happiness.
just survived, and it really takes some perseverance to do it. In life, I see too many people giving up halfway. They will go back to find someone because of longing and unwilling to wait for various reasons. Even if they are covered in bruises and are treated coldly, they are still like moths flying into a flame. The word love is often uncontrollable.
But it doesn’t matter. When you really make all your efforts, time and reality will give you new achievements. Through the mountains and rivers, the answers you once could not find may no longer be important later. It’s just a calm smile and a passing cloud.
Who didn’t come here like this?
After all, everyone is similar.
-END-
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