Introduction: From ancient times to the present, the topic of filial piety has been very discussed. From various filial piety methods to how to satisfy parents, everyone is also carefully comparing whether they have done it when they pay attention. Especially the news that various factors that appear on social platforms are not supported by children, causing the elderly to fall into trouble, which makes people pay extremely high attention to filial piety. No matter how stressful life is, they will not forget to treat their parents well.
False filial piety in "captive care" is prevalent, and children are unaware that the elderly have troubles and cannot say that
However, when we truly enter the age of supporting our parents and our parents also enter the age of old age, have you ever thought that your filial piety will really make your parents feel comfortable? It’s better to just treat it from a personal perspective, and feel that everyone does this, and parents will definitely enjoy such arrangements for their old age.
Since his wife passed away a few years ago, Uncle Chen has been staying in the village, and his son's family has moved to the city to stabilize, which has also solved the problems of mortgage and car loans. In order to prevent the father from being so lonely, the son decided to take Uncle Chen to the city and live with the whole family.
At first, Uncle Chen, who was taken to the city by his son, was very happy. After all, he lived in the village for a long time, and after coming to the city, everything was fresh. But as time goes by, Uncle Chen gradually discovered that no matter how long he lived, he was always out of place.
For example, most people in the city use Mandarin to communicate. He only speaks hometown dialect and often cannot understand what the other party is saying. Over time, no one in the community can speak to him.
And other words, the daughter-in-law always seems to be thinking about her origin. Although she has never said anything that makes him sad, the grandson's accidental saying "Grandpa didn't take a shower" made him feel particularly uncomfortable in this family.
Because I am used to the slightly harder bed in the village, it is difficult to adapt to the soft mattress my daughter-in-law bought for her for a lot of money. But even if she had a pain in her back, Uncle Chen didn't dare to say anything more. After all, it cost money, and I wouldn't be embarrassed to change it.
This emotion broke out until the day he visited the grave on his wife's death day. When he returned to the village, he met his familiar old neighbors. After returning to the familiar house, he also told his son that he still wanted to live here, which was more free and comfortable.
This request made Uncle Chen’s son confused. Life in the city is so comfortable and his family is around, so why don’t he go back?
In fact, Uncle Chen’s son cannot be said to be unfilial, but his filial piety is the captive method of raising old age that is now called “false filial piety”.
We all know that under the development and changes in society, education, and other aspects, young people today will not return to their hometowns to live directly after completing their studies. They are more willing to struggle in big cities or choose a place with relatively good economic conditions and work benefits to settle down and live.
In this way, it is difficult to get them back to their hometown to support their elderly parents, or find a job in their hometown to live a down-to-earth life. In order to achieve a balance between taking care of parents and working hard, young people will bring their parents in their hometown to live together.
However, in the eyes of children, can the place where there are more guarantees and resources really make the elderly happy? In real life, perhaps some elderly people can accept this lifestyle change, but some elderly people have to face the completely unfamiliar new world again, and even the most basic language communication, they have to adapt more to learn.
And the son of Chen in the story did not consider the old man's ideas, which led to the "captive care method of elderly care". It seemed that he was filial, but the old man did not really enjoy it.
So, what aspects should we start from so that the elderly can truly feel filial?
First of all, pay attention to their insecurity.When you enter the old age, you will inevitably suffer from physical and economic expenditures. At this time, capable children should care more about their parents' health, such as taking them for a physical examination, and asking about their well-being. It is also appropriate to give some living expenses during holidays.
The second is to take care of their loneliness. In the eyes of young people, it seems a bit lonely when they stay in their hometown, but they still have to ask their opinions first, whether they are more willing to stay in their hometown or live with them together. If it is the former, we might as well bring our children to visit more in our spare time, or use the phone frequently.
Another thing is to know in time whether they can adapt. After all, I am coming to a new place and I am not familiar with many things. Children should teach more and accompany them at this time, and don’t have conflicts at any time, which will make the elderly feel sad.
Summary: No matter what age you are at, pension is a topic worth discussing. I hope that children can think more about problems from the perspective of the elderly and truly understand their feelings and ideas.
