Someone once described middle-aged married life as a pair of rotating "gears" that only work step by step every day. While losing the lubrication of love, it seems that only indifference and numbness towards each other are left.
In fact, in such middle-aged marriages, even many "parties" themselves don't know where the problem lies. What seemed like insignificant things turned out to be the trigger for a broken relationship.
3 reasons why middle-aged marriages are not going well, and there are no escapes
1. Women are too strong at home, and most of their lives are unhappy.
Zhang Jing, 46 years old, is currently separated from her husband.
"I am a bit strong. We just had a fight a few days ago. In fact, it is not all my problem. Several friends I know have similar personalities to me, and the relationship between husband and wife is not very good. In that respect ? Not to mention, he doesn’t want to touch me at all! "
Strong women often have one thing in common in marriage, which is a very strong desire to control. No matter big or small, she has her own " one-vote ", and she never listens to her husband's suggestions.
When educating children, he will also talk about his father's shortcomings, which will damage his husband's self-esteem. When a child grows up in such an environment, it is easy for him to become estranged from his father. In terms of marital life, husbands often lose interest in sexual intercourse because of their wives' lack of gentleness.
2. Sleeping in separate beds, induced marital crisis
Yingzi, 34 years old, works as a cashier in a supermarket. She has been married for 5 years and divorced for 1 year.
"The brother who slept on my upper bunk was a true reflection of my marriage at that time." Yingzi said with a wry smile: "When we were together, we talked about everything. He would pick me up when I got off work late. . When I take a break, I will also prepare a sumptuous dinner for him. But I don’t know when this habit disappeared little by little. He often works overtime and doesn’t come home until very late. We fell asleep in the living room, and our relationship was no longer what it used to be. "
As time goes by, the loss of freshness and passion makes the two people communicate less and less, and each is busy with his own things. The habit of sleeping in separate rooms makes the two of them less like a couple living under the same roof, and more and more like roommates who know each other but are not familiar with each other. This lasted for a year and a half. Yingzi couldn't bear this kind of married life and finally filed for divorce.
3. The disharmonious life of husband and wife is the root cause of divorce
"Our life as husband and wife is no different from working. There is no fun, only coping." Lao Li has been married for almost 20 years. In order to be the mainstay of the family, he Work hard every day and don’t dare to slack off. Although life is getting better and better, there are problems in the marriage.
In fact, both Lao Li and his wife understand where the problem lies, but Lao Li thinks that he is already this age and does not want to go to the hospital often for "that little thing". But after two unsuccessful attempts, Lao Li himself also lost his mind. confidence.
In such a married life, the relationship between Lao Li and his lover became increasingly dull, and conflicts increased. Although the two knew the source of the conflict, it also brought great pain to both parties. Lao Li has thought about divorce, but getting divorced because of this matter seems to be a bit of a fuss. But he can continue to live together and fall into pain every day...
More than 70% of divorced couples admit that it is related to the disharmony in their married life.
According to relevant statistics, among the 1.4 million divorce cases, the proportion of divorces due to disharmony between husband and wife is as high as 77.5%. Many people don't understand whether married life is really that important, especially as we get older, the idea of "that aspect" should not be so strong.
But the fact is exactly the opposite. The breakdown of many middle-aged marriages begins with the disharmony in the couple's life. Boredom, indifference, quarrels... these are all a series of chain reactions caused by disharmony in a couple's life.
A harmonious married life can help the brain release oxytocin , reduce anxiety and other negative emotions, and enhance the relationship between husband and wife.In addition to being beneficial to mental health, it can also help men promote the metabolism of prostatic fluid and protect the health of the prostate. For women, it will stimulate the secretion of estrogen in the body, regulate endocrine, and be beneficial to the health of the uterus.
Erectile dysfunction requires "cooperative treatment" between husband and wife
Although a harmonious married life is very important, some middle-aged and elderly men often suffer from erectile dysfunction, which makes them "overwhelmed". For the treatment of male erectile dysfunction, there are two aspects that are very important:
1 and drug treatment
For the treatment of male erectile dysfunction, "nafil" drugs are currently the main treatment. Avanafil , as the latest generation of PDE5 preparations, has the advantages of fast onset of action and minimal side effects. In addition, because the foreign patent has expired, avanafil has been developed domestically, and the price is only one-third of the imported drug. Therefore, after avanafil was launched in China, it has been favored by many middle-aged and elderly patients.
2, partner help
Insufficient blood supply to the corpus cavernosum is one of the main causes of male erectile dysfunction. The main function of avanafil is to promote the dilation of blood vessels in the corpus cavernosum to increase blood supply.
However, it should be noted that avanafil is not an "aphrodisiac" and will not cause automatic erection after taking the medicine. While avanafil can help patients with erectile dysfunction problems, it also requires help from a partner. Without external stimulation, taking medicine is useless.
In addition, partners also play an important role in the psychological construction of male patients. Many male ED patients suffer a huge blow to their self-confidence after trying it a few times. Erectile dysfunction due to psychological disorders is also one of the causes of ED in men. At this time, if the partner can comfort and encourage his significant other in time, it can help the man slowly regain his confidence and get out of the psychological barrier.
