Why can't you find a girlfriend even though your conditions are so good? Some boys have good grades since childhood, have a gentle personality, are kind-hearted, and have good looks. They are good boys in the eyes of their parents. However, in relationships, they are not popular

Why can't you find a girlfriend even though your conditions are so good?

Some boys have good grades since childhood, have a gentle personality, are kind-hearted, and have good looks. They are good boys in the eyes of their parents. However, in relationships, they are not popular with girls. The fundamental reason why

has such a situation is that cannot distinguish the difference between "advantages" and "benefits".

You have many advantages, but have you ever thought: Perhaps, girls don’t want these advantages from you? These advantages of yours are of no benefit to her?

In the process of chasing girls, if boys can understand the principles of applying "advantages" and "benefits", then the effect will be twice the result with half the effort. I will give you a "principle diagram of application" at the end of the article.

Let me give you an example first to help you understand.

There was a family that was recruiting chefs. When a man came for the interview, he said that he had won many honors. After introducing himself, he cooked in person to show off his abilities.

However, after the owner tried a few dishes, he was eliminated because the dishes he cooked were too spicy and the owner liked lighter tastes.

In fact, during the interview process of the chef, he kept talking about his own advantages and ignored the needs of the homeowner. Although his skills were very good, they were of little use to the homeowner.

Therefore, it does not mean that you have enough advantages to be favored by others.

In the same way, when chasing girls, boys must understand: "advantages" are bonus points, but they can only make girls like you, and "benefits" are the reasons for girls to choose you.

Therefore, when getting along with girls, boys should let girls know: What "benefits" can you bring to her?

This is a real problem: the higher your value to her, the more she will favor you.

Let me tell you a story: the kitten and the little bear are pursuing the little rabbit at the same time.

The kitten is very good to the little rabbit and is willing to give the little rabbit the candy he likes.

The little bear guards the little rabbit's hole every day, helping it drive away the companions who bully it, because the little bear understands that the little rabbit has lost its parents since childhood and is always bullied by its peers, resulting in a lack of security in its heart.

So, the little rabbit chose the bear, because the bear could satisfy its sense of security.

Although the kitten is also very kind to the little rabbit, it does not know that the little rabbit does not like to eat sweets.

In fact, in relationships, no one dislikes people who are kind to them, but this kind of liking is not love.

In the process of chasing a girl, only when the girl discovers that this boy has real "value" to her, can she feel love.

Of course, this "value" is not "use value", but a kind of "help".

When you fall in love with a girl, you must first have an in-depth understanding of her, including: personality characteristics, growth experience, native family environment, etc.

"Understanding a girl" is to find her emotional needs, and then the boy can meet the girl's emotional needs in a planned way. This is a "tailor-made" pursuit method.

We all know that the essence of pursuing girls is to "show attraction", but "showing attraction" is not just about showing girls their own advantages, because she has not experienced "the help that your points bring to her" ".

What boys have to do is: Let "their own advantages" and "girls' emotional needs" find a "fitting point". You must know that the more "fitting points" between two people, the more girls will be attracted to you. .

For example, boys know that girls are always hesitant to do things and often get themselves into entanglements, while boys are decisive in doing things.

Then, boys should think about: How to use their "decisive" advantage to help girls get rid of the trouble of "tangled emotions"?

If boys only show girls "decisive style in handling things", then for girls, the experience of love is not strong enough.

Therefore, when chasing a girl, you should not just show your own attraction. You should find the "fitting point" between two people and then meet the girl's emotional needs in a targeted manner.

Boys should understand: The girls you like are not begged, but attracted by the "better you".

Therefore, boys should learn to make themselves better. First of all, what they need to do is: first learn to master the entire process of chasing girls.

If you want to learn the skills and methods of chasing girls systematically and comprehensively, you can join my column "Man with 99 Points" to help you catch the girl you like.

I am Lei Te, welcome to follow me @雷特说, interpret the skills of chasing girls from a high-dimensional perspective, and let your emotional intelligence crush your peers.