文|Zhu Shenyong
A client said, "My husband has been with that woman outside for half a year. I have been in too much pain during these six months. I can't eat or sleep. I have lost more than ten pounds, but he has not apologized to me at all. He has no awareness at all." Not only did he hurt me, but he didn’t comfort me even after I cried all night last night. Instead, he blamed me for disturbing him, and said that he wouldn’t marry Xiao Lu, and Xiao Lu was the one who was sorry.”
In fact, this situation occurs in many marriages with extramarital affairs. Let’s dig deeper into the reasons for this phenomenon.
1. When a man chooses a "threesome", he actually chooses marriage.
When men engage in extramarital affairs, they are actually engaging in threesomes. They neither divorce nor break up. In this case, many people will be confused and fall into the trap of who they love and who they choose.
In fact, when a man has a threesome, he chooses his wife, which is marriage.
If he chooses Xiaolu, he will definitely take the initiative, be kind, firm, and continue to promote divorce until there is a divorce result, instead of engaging in a threesome.
chose marriage when having a threesome. Because of luck and greed, he also had an extramarital affair. This man knows what he wants, and he also knows that what Xiao Lu wants is true love and marriage. He pretends to be confused and deceives Xiao Lu, so when facing Xiao Lu, men tend to feel guilty.
At this point, you need to reveal the man’s true face during the wife’s three-way meeting. When you overcome your husband’s guilt during the husband-wife meeting, you must make it clear that Xiaolu is voluntarily independent in the extramarital affair. She has the ability and judgment to do what she chooses to do. Xiao Lu just chooses to accept and digest these injuries by herself. She has the ability to take responsibility for her own actions.
2. Can’t see the hurt of my wife.
Men who have extramarital affairs have a kind of luck and arrogance. They think:
If I don't admit it, my wife will not know about it. As long as the wife doesn't know, there is no harm done to the wife. Since there is no harm done, what do I have to feel guilty about?
This is the logic of men who engage in extramarital affairs. Many times they really don’t think that their wives will be harmed in extramarital affairs.
And men will think, I will give you all the money, will I divorce you, go home every day, and take care of the children, what harm will it do to you?
Some men will think that friends around me also have extramarital affairs, and their wives can accept it. Why can't you accept it? You are just too pretentious, you are just emotional.
Men cannot see the harm. They think that if they do not divorce or admit it, it means there is no harm, and naturally they will not feel guilty.
You need to break this point with the man, and you need to approach it from all aspects, so that your husband can see the harm and destruction that extramarital affairs have caused to you, and let your husband know what you are going through.
3. I feel that my wife is my own person and I will not consider the issue of guilt.
When a man engages in extramarital affairs, he wants to find a supplement to his marriage. If the marriage is 90 points, he wants to find a 10-point compensation. He always feels that his wife is his own, and there is no need to talk about guilt.
Just like when facing a risk, a man will feel that Xiaolu may jump up and hurt himself, but his wife is one of his own and will not hurt herself.
He felt that Xiaolu might run away. He was an outsider and wanted to please and appease him. His wife was one of his own and would tolerate him. He would not want a divorce, would protect himself, and would not consider his guilt towards his wife.
Even if he feels guilty, he will ignore it. Especially when many wives face extramarital affairs, they will indeed protect their men, their jobs, their faces, and their marriage. This will further reduce the man's sense of guilt and give him more courage to have a threesome to the end.
The above are the reasons why a man does not feel that he owes his wife when he has an extramarital affair. Faced with this situation, the wife must not hold back and dare to take action against the extramarital affair, so that the man can see your strength and means, and the harm to you and the family. Destroy, only in this way will men wake up step by step.
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