年年年年年年年年年年年年41990/2000entries
Today is the first time that Jingdu Jun will accompany you for your lifelong growth 3282days
We often see the question like this: Is emotional intelligence important or IQ important?
Some people will say that emotional intelligence and IQ are equally important, but you must make a choice, and many people will choose the former.
Especially in a "human society" like China, if we are not people with super IQ, we seem to prefer people with high emotional intelligence.
and learns to get along with yourself and understands the social interaction ability of others, which is one of the important manifestations of emotional intelligence .
Sheldon in the American drama " Big Bang Theory " is a person with a high IQ and a low EQ. In his life, he thinks many of people's practices are strange.
And in the eyes of others, Sheldon, who has a super IQ, has many behaviors very strange.
People with low emotional intelligence like Sheldon often see that what they lack is the understanding and learning of emotional intelligence:
How to get along with people, how to get along with the world, and clearly understand self-emotions in these complex and complex relationships.
At the same time, understand the underlying logic behind emotions to help us better cope with the troubles caused by various improper emotions.
01
Emotional function
" Little Prince " says: "You can only see clearly with your heart. The essential things are invisible with the naked eye."
And in emotions, the essential things are actually the human body reaction and the human emotional functions.
people's emotions can directly cause physiological reactions, and emotions can mobilize physical fitness.
For example, our body's stress response when we are frightened, or our nervousness when facing urgent matters, or our joy when we are praised by others.
And these emotional reactions come from the control of the human brain, and the brain reacts in a series of reactions due to stimulation from the external environment.
The behaviors performed by the brain are divided into two types: One is emotional and psychological behavior, and the other is rational psychological behavior .
is what we often call sensory and rational , which is one used to think and get behavioral results, and the other is to react with feelings.
Sensibility and reason exist in our bodies at the same time. They are controlled by the brain, and both are like the two ends of a seesaw.
If the brain is properly controlled, the two are at a balance point, otherwise they will tend toward a certain direction.
If unrestrained, the emotions will be out of control.
Just as Horace said:
"Life is a comedy for rational people, and a tragedy for emotional people."
Good at dealing with emotions can help improve a person's sense of happiness in life, while improving his own work efficiency .
02
The essence of emotional intelligence
Many times, people cannot control their emotions because they do not have a clear understanding of their current situation and mood.
As we often say, "Onsighters are clear, and those in the authorities are confused."
If you want to see through the essence of emotional quotient, the most important thing is to know yourself :
Know your current emotions and feel your current psychology.
Self-awareness is a continuous focus on inner psychology, self-observation, and looking at yourself out of yourself .
As a bystander, you can often see more cognitions that you cannot see, helping you make emotional choices. 年年年年年年年年年年年年41990/2000entries Today is the first time that Jingdu Jun will accompany you for your lifelong growth 3282days We often see the question like this: Is emotional intelligence important or IQ important? Some people will say that emotional intelligence and IQ are equally important, but you must make a choice, and many people will choose the former. Especially in a "human society" like China, if we are not people with super IQ, we seem to prefer people with high emotional intelligence. and learns to get along with yourself and understands the social interaction ability of others, which is one of the important manifestations of emotional intelligence . Sheldon in the American drama " Big Bang Theory " is a person with a high IQ and a low EQ. In his life, he thinks many of people's practices are strange. And in the eyes of others, Sheldon, who has a super IQ, has many behaviors very strange. People with low emotional intelligence like Sheldon often see that what they lack is the understanding and learning of emotional intelligence: How to get along with people, how to get along with the world, and clearly understand self-emotions in these complex and complex relationships. At the same time, understand the underlying logic behind emotions to help us better cope with the troubles caused by various improper emotions. 01
Emotional function
" Little Prince " says: "You can only see clearly with your heart. The essential things are invisible with the naked eye."
And in emotions, the essential things are actually the human body reaction and the human emotional functions.
people's emotions can directly cause physiological reactions, and emotions can mobilize physical fitness.
For example, our body's stress response when we are frightened, or our nervousness when facing urgent matters, or our joy when we are praised by others.
And these emotional reactions come from the control of the human brain, and the brain reacts in a series of reactions due to stimulation from the external environment.
The behaviors performed by the brain are divided into two types: One is emotional and psychological behavior, and the other is rational psychological behavior .
is what we often call sensory and rational , which is one used to think and get behavioral results, and the other is to react with feelings.
Sensibility and reason exist in our bodies at the same time. They are controlled by the brain, and both are like the two ends of a seesaw.
If the brain is properly controlled, the two are at a balance point, otherwise they will tend toward a certain direction.
If unrestrained, the emotions will be out of control.
Just as Horace said:
"Life is a comedy for rational people, and a tragedy for emotional people."
Good at dealing with emotions can help improve a person's sense of happiness in life, while improving his own work efficiency .
02
The essence of emotional intelligence
Many times, people cannot control their emotions because they do not have a clear understanding of their current situation and mood.
As we often say, "Onsighters are clear, and those in the authorities are confused."
If you want to see through the essence of emotional quotient, the most important thing is to know yourself :
Know your current emotions and feel your current psychology.
Self-awareness is a continuous focus on inner psychology, self-observation, and looking at yourself out of yourself .
As a bystander, you can often see more cognitions that you cannot see, helping you make emotional choices.
After having this self-awareness, how should we manage our emotions?
In fact, the so-called management of emotions is not to restrain one's own emotions, but to get rid of the influence of bad emotions through some means and methods.
There are many types of emotions, such as sadness, anger, happiness, sorrow...
In general, these emotions can be divided into two categories, one is positive emotions , and the other is negative emotions .
And among negative emotions, anger is the most difficult to control. In the book, the author gives several ways to eliminate anger:
① Control and question the thoughts that trigger anger and obtain easing information.
② Get rid of the other person when you are angry, distract yourself, and be in an environment that cannot further arouse anger, waiting for the adrenal surging to gradually disappear and the physiological level returns to calm.
③ Stop anger or hostile thoughts when they are just sprouting and write them down.
are actually what we often use, calm down when we are angry, or divert our attention through other things.
Only by truly seeing through the essence of emotional quotient can you better control your own emotions.
Controlling one's own emotions is only part of emotional qualities. What is more important is to have the ability to get along with others, that is, empathy.
Embologic can help a person better feel other people's emotions while helping others regulate their emotions. This is the core of dealing with interpersonal relationships and the key to improving our emotional intelligence .
03
Window of Opportunity
Children are extremely keen learners, and family life is the earliest school for individual emotional learning. The role of parents is the teacher of emotions.
Parents have high emotional intelligence, which will benefit their children in a huge way.
Adults always give some false propositions to test their children's emotional intelligence. For example, children are always asked: "Do you like fathers more or mothers more?"
Similar questions are often used to exercise children. Parents use this method to tell their children how to speak and how to improve their emotional intelligence.
Children can be affected a lot from their parents' emotions, and parents who are good at dealing with emotions will also subtly influence their children's ability to deal with emotions.
Similarly, the emotions developed by a child in a family of violent emotions will also have the output of the original family.
If a person is mentally traumatized, he must restore his new life through emotional re-learning and overcoming trauma.
Recovery of post-traumatic stress disorder can be divided into three stages: gain a sense of security; remember the details of the trauma and mourn the losses caused; and then return to normal life .
It takes a lot of effort and courage to get out of the trauma of the past. Some people even spend their whole lives to heal the trauma left by childhood.
In the current society, due to various environments and factors, many people are deeply affected by depression.
Some people lose themselves in anxiety, sadness and anger, which ultimately leads to depression. The best way to reduce the risk of depression is to look at difficulties with a positive attitude and not allow negative emotions to spread.
In fact, this is equivalent to injecting psychological vaccines in advance. This kind of psychological construction is of great help to reduce much mental internal friction at present.
04
Emotional education
Focus on a person's emotional health status, which is one of the important topics of many schools and even enterprises at present.
Especially for emotionally unstable teenagers, education on their correct emotions becomes particularly important.
In the relevant courses of emotional education, it includes "social development", "life skills", "social and emotional learning", "human-machine intelligence", etc.
. Self-education is the pioneer of emotional education. First of all, one must enable a person to consciously control himself, or someone pulls him from the outside when he is trapped in an emotional quagmire.
Emotional education can be introduced by families, communities and schools, starting from where children can receive the most education.
Cultivating a person's emotional literacy is not an effort. In reality, many people lack emotional education due to some objective majeure factors.
Children who lack care can easily develop emotional disorders.
Emotional education can help children to take on various roles in life, become better friends, students, children, and become better husbands and wives, employees and bosses, parents and citizens in the future.
Doing a good job of emotional education is the direction and goal of the joint efforts of all groups in society.
05
Conclusion
Whether it is emotional intelligence or IQ, only through continuous learning can you manage your emotions and help yourself learn more with a more stable psychology.
Correctly understand yourself and improve your ability to use emotional intelligence. The essence of emotional intelligence is not to cater to others, but to learn to control yourself.
I hope you can become a mature person with stable emotions, thoughtful, insightful and emotional intelligence.
Author: Zhou Yao, member of the Jing Reading Friends Association. Practice in the dust and survive in the secular world.
In the relevant courses of emotional education, it includes "social development", "life skills", "social and emotional learning", "human-machine intelligence", etc.
. Self-education is the pioneer of emotional education. First of all, one must enable a person to consciously control himself, or someone pulls him from the outside when he is trapped in an emotional quagmire.
Emotional education can be introduced by families, communities and schools, starting from where children can receive the most education.
Cultivating a person's emotional literacy is not an effort. In reality, many people lack emotional education due to some objective majeure factors.
Children who lack care can easily develop emotional disorders.
Emotional education can help children to take on various roles in life, become better friends, students, children, and become better husbands and wives, employees and bosses, parents and citizens in the future.
Doing a good job of emotional education is the direction and goal of the joint efforts of all groups in society.
05
Conclusion
Whether it is emotional intelligence or IQ, only through continuous learning can you manage your emotions and help yourself learn more with a more stable psychology.
Correctly understand yourself and improve your ability to use emotional intelligence. The essence of emotional intelligence is not to cater to others, but to learn to control yourself.
I hope you can become a mature person with stable emotions, thoughtful, insightful and emotional intelligence.
Author: Zhou Yao, member of the Jing Reading Friends Association. Practice in the dust and survive in the secular world.
