Netizens ask for help:
Last night, the elders at home talked to me about my break-up with a long time. In my opinion, the other party has no motivation at all. People are recognized as honest people, but I can't see any hope for the future. My grandfather said that I can't stand the foundation for doing things, and they don't lack arms or legs. You have estimated yourself too high.
Our family is people who do not do harm to others. How can we raise our heads like this? People definitely don’t say what you are bad, they will only say that it was instructed by their family members, and even people in their seventies will be told together.
You have to consider the consequences when doing things. No matter how incompetent he is, he will not do anything bad. If he is not capable, should you take the lead in striving?
I can’t refute what people in the family said, but life is not what I want, I really don’t know what to do. Is this really like what my grandfather said that I won’t end well in the future?
xinhaiwan psychological counselor answered:
From the family perspective, breaking off the engagement will bring some dissatisfaction and harm to the two families. After all, they both think it is good, and I believe they have put in a lot of effort for it. Seeing that a "good thing" is messed up, a family that has always been kind may have a real demographic and be criticized, and it is indeed embarrassment and embarrassment. It can also be seen that the family is also worried that your "disgraceful" behavior will affect your future marriage and love, which is also out of care for you.
may also be a big pain for your fiancé. He may not have done anything wrong. He is looking like he can bear fruit, but now he has failed, and he inevitably has a lot of complex emotions, etc.
The above are the harm your remorse brings to others, and of course you are also one of the victims of remorse. But I want to say that marriage is a matter of two families, and even more so is a matter of two people, and the most important thing is your personal matter. After all, you and your fiancé want to live together for the rest of your life, and only you can experience the warmth and warmth of it.
Maybe your unhappiness and grievance can be exchanged for the happiness of others, but how long can this superficial happiness last? What's more, such happiness comes at the cost of your happiness and happiness. How long can you last for such efforts?
In the end, you are unhappy, your family will not be happy, and both families will not be happy either.
Respect your own feelings is a manifestation of self-love. Only by knowing how to love yourself can you truly love others. To aggrievance and force yourself to love is a hypocrisy towards yourself and others, and this false love will hurt both parties.
Repentance of marriage because of your self-love is a fulfillment of yourself, and in fact it is also a fulfillment of your fiancé. You all have the opportunity to find the MR/MS right that you love and love yourself.
Looking for your own happiness, the family will also feel happy for your happiness. If your fiancé really loves you, I believe he will be happy for your happiness in the future.
Self-love is difficult, but it is worth it! (Original by Xinhaiwan, please indicate the source when reprinting)
