You may be full of expectations before you plan to try psychological counseling, but some of these expectations may be unrealistic.
For example, don't expect to find the most suitable consultant in one go. You may need to meet more than one consultant and conduct several consultations before you can find that “right” consultant.
People often want to know how to improve their relationships, how to better manage their emotions or anxiety, or how to change some of their specific behaviors. In these cases, people will seek help from psychological counseling , either pursue personal growth, or want to relieve symptoms, or overall desire to improve the quality of life.
No matter how you made this decision at the time, you were about to try psychological counseling, now you are about to enter the first consultation, you may be full of expectations, but some of these expectations may be unrealistic. What are the unrealistic expectations of
?
01
Don't expect a quick battle and a quick decision
There are very few problems that can be solved with one consultation. The first few consultations, your counselor will evaluate with you whether psychological counseling will be helpful to you and which psychological counseling will be helpful to you. The consultant will ask you to tell you about your motivation for help, as well as your medical history, social experience, family history, etc., so as to better understand you.
Exposure to your symptoms and experiences will make some people feel uncomfortable and will also make some people feel relieved. In any case, it is almost impossible to make positive and lasting changes through just a few appointments, and it is almost impossible to reverse those long-standing thinking patterns and behaviors.
That is to say, some structured therapies are focused on the present, and we can expect them to have relatively time limits, such as cognitive behavioral therapy, interpersonal therapy or acceptance commitment therapy. Dynamic psychological counseling and psychoanalysis focus on exploring unconscious desires and unconscious processes, which requires us to invest longer in .
02
Most of the time, the psychological counseling process is not so easy
Psychological counseling is a task that requires you to carefully examine yourself. You don't have to complete this process alone, your consultant will work with you.
You will work together to better understand what causes your current problems, such as some specific ways of thinking, ways of avoiding worries, expression and processing of emotions, communication style, etc.
At the same time, you will also understand how your current pattern makes you feel good and how it makes you feel bad. You will also practice some different ways of thinking, behavior, explanation mechanisms and coping strategies.
In this process, your status may get worse before it improves. For example, talking about traumatic experiences can affect sleep; confronting the bad behaviors others treat you or the malicious actions you have ever done to others can make you sad and angry.
Raise your hand to speak in class and decide whether to divorce - facing these things you are afraid of is like riding a roller coaster, which will cause more anxiety in the short term.
When you feel worse, remember: the old patterns also make you suffer. This may be worth our time to see if these difficult moments will eventually be replaced by something better.
03
chat with a consultant and chat with friends
consultation relationship is different from other relationships. It is not mutually beneficial, it is not a "double-way". You may share some private details with your consultant, and the other party may not respond. This does not mean that the counselor is harsh or conceals, nor does it mean that the counselor does not trust or likes you.
On the contrary, your consultant maintains restraint on whether to share personal information with you, in order to focus on you and your goals. In some therapies, this will also help you understand your assumptions (projections) about your counselor, thereby understanding yourself in another way.
Sometimes, a consultant setting such a boundary can serve as a role model to demonstrate to you how to set boundaries with others.
04
Your consultant usually won't tell you how to do it
Because after you make a choice, your consultant will not directly bear the consequences of your choice, so the consultant will avoid giving obvious guidance. Ta will not tell you what to do, but will ask you some questions to help you clarify what you really want to do and the reasons behind it.
Of course, there are some exceptions. If your consultant is worried that you may cause harm to your own and others' safety, he may give more direct guidance than usual.
Ta will feedback what you said , so as to help you look at what you say from a new perspective so as to examine yourself more thoroughly. Your consultant may guide you to think about other choices you have never thought of, or to explore the positive, negative and intermediate results that a specific choice may bring.
If you decide to work with a consultant for a long time, your consultant may remind you to be aware of some previous decisions (and their consequences), or some repetitive pattern. This may show how you process the decisions that are in front of you and how you deal with these consequences.
05
Don't expect to find the most suitable consultant in one go
Although the consultation relationship has its own special features, it also has some similarities with other relationships, and it is also the process when two people gradually get together.
Obviously you are an expert in understanding yourself. You come to the consultation room with your unique temperament and personal style. You have your own understanding of your current problems and you also have your own opinions on the consultation goals. Your counselor is a mental health expert who welcomes you with his unique treatment methods, clinical experience and personality.
You may not be able to feel a match when you find the first consultant, you may need more than once to see if you match. You may need to meet more than one consultant and conduct several consultations before you can find that "right" consultant.
How to find the most matching consultant?
Which consultant do you match best? This varies from person to person, but you can consider the following questions. This is a good start for evaluating a consultant for yourself:
◍ Does the consultant convey professionalism? Is the dialogue between the consultant and you professionally arranged in the consultation room? Have you introduced some professional ethics to you? For example, temporary cancellation of appointments or other emergencies?
◍ Is the consultant’s question concerned?
◍ If you encounter some challenges at the beginning of the consultation, will you feel comfortable talking to the consultant?
◍ Do you like their style? Including the level of interaction with you, the use of humor, the ability to perceive and describe your emotional state?
This article is compiled, original link:
https://www.verywellmind.com/common-misconceptions-about-psychotherapy-4067089
Author: Deborah R. Glasofer
Compilation: Simple Psychology Yikang
Image source: Pinteresttml7
Editor: bird man, lucy
To the end:
Psychological knowledge is a pair of spiritual armor.This is true for a lot of wealth. Most of the time you think it is useless, and at the critical moment, it will turn into an invisible life-saving straw to take you out of difficulties.
Psychological counseling is a process of seeing oneself, seeing the world, and seeing sentient beings. I hope everyone can meet themselves in psychology!
I wish everyone can get ashore as soon as possible and reap the life they want in the end!
If you also want to study psychology, apply for a psychological counselor, on the one hand, it is for future development and on the other hand, it is to improve your self-ability. You can follow the official account [Karuitong] to reply to the "Psychological Counselor" for consultation and application.
No matter how bad your life is,
doesn’t prevent you from getting better and better
takes the initiative to take the first step
can only lead to the existing emotional dilemma!
