No matter whether your parents or yourself as parents, your existence does not limit you will definitely limit your children.
. This limitation is not all a problem or bad. It is actually a resource and direction.
From a starting point, there are some restrictions on this starting point. Some roads you cannot walk, you can only walk your good road, where you can start slowly.
In this article, we will discuss that our family has many limitations and impacts. How can we find these things better?
The most important resource is right next to you
This is your intimate relationship, your partner.
Your partner is a deeper expression. Your partner is the best candidate for you on the soul level.
They are here to help you and support you in solving the constraints and limitations of your family background.
Basically, your criticism of your partner is actually your inheritance of your family background.
We always unconsciously repeat the way parents get along
For example, if your parents are your father, have a bad temper, like to blame others, and then a strong person, the husband you find may be such a man.
Many times we will find that we will unconsciously repeat the way our parents get along.
Why?
A very important part attracts a partner who is very much like our parents because we actually have a part that is very much like him or is under pressure. There are two ways to express
. First, we have this part, but we suppress it.
Find your own missing from your partner
For example, your partner is casual, and you are a very self-disciplined person.
You really don't have that part. You are casual and sloppy. You are very self-disciplined and strict. And he is exactly the opposite of you.
Does it mean you don’t have that place, but you actually have it. It's just that you don't allow it to appear.
You put pressure on it, your father may be a very procrastinating and irresponsible person.
Then your mother may often look down on him, criticize him, and then you almost agree with your mother, and then your heart will criticize your father together, and then you will feel that I can't be like my father.
Is it really right for you to work so hard
I must be very progressive, very responsible, very good?
Then you don't allow yourself to rest, lazy, any part you think is very indulgent, very harsh on yourself, and then you find a partner, it's just that coincidental, it's this part that presents.
Then you will find that elsewhere may be good, but this part is the part you can't stand it.
This is your password that is your clue, which is the part you bring about self-criticism and unacceptable, you project on your partner, which is a way of expression.
What is another level? Another level is that your father is strong, or your mother is strong.
said at home, and then you became such a person. You are exactly the same as them.
What does intimacy bring to us
First of all, you hate such a person, and then you don't allow yourself to be a part of his opposite values. The second situation is that you are exactly like him and then you find a partner to become another part.
You see, if you are strong, you will find a very obedient person, and then you will abandon him, just like your mother is strong and capable.
You can find a lot of these clues from your intimacy, so these clues are actually accumulated in your life and family.
What you need to do is accept each other, but in fact, on a deeper level, you can accept yourself and your parents at the same time.
