01
The old saying goes, "Children and grandchildren have their own blessings." When children are older, it is better for parents to take care of them less. If you control too much, you will often become enemies. Especially after children get married, parents must not get involved in their marriage life, as long as their children are not doing murder and arson.
But some mother-in-law can't help but insist on interfering with their son and daughter-in-law, which ended up causing a disagreement in the family. In fact, everyone has their own way of living. Mother-in-law should relax her mind and not be disliked by this or that.
Nowadays, young people advocate personality and freedom. They want to live their own way. If their parents care about them, they will be very disgusted. If the mother-in-law cares about her daughter-in-law, she will be even more disgusted, so the mother-in-law should be more aware of her and don’t make things boring.
02
0 On the third day after the son got married, the mother-in-law moved to her son's house on the pretext that her son's house was close to the hospital. In fact, the mother-in-law sets rules for her daughter-in-law, for fear that her son will suffer losses in the marriage.
This happened at Xiao Linlin's house. After living with her mother-in-law for a month, she had a fight and finally parted ways. Let’s listen to their family’s stories.
Self-reporter: Xiao Linlin
Age: 28 years old
Occupation: Nurse
City: Wujiang
03
http://www.sub.com/ My experience is similar to him. When I was a child, I lived with my parents and my mother did the housework. Later, when we lived in the school, we ate at the school cafeteria and just washed our clothes by ourselves, or took them home for my mother to wash them on weekends.
After graduating from university, we started working, each living in the dormitory of the unit and eating in the cafeteria. The hygiene in the dormitory was cleaned by the dormitory aunt . We just need to wash our own clothes and there are no other housework.
When my husband and I were in love, both parents knew about our situation. Anyway, my husband and I were the same, so no one disliked the bad things. Several times when my mother-in-law mentioned to me about doing housework, I told her directly, "I don't know how to do housework." My mother-in-law asked me what to do after marriage, and I will talk about it later!
Later, my husband and I were going to get married. My mother-in-law meant that my husband and I lived with them, and their family would not buy a wedding house. My mother-in-law’s reason is that neither of us can do housework. If we live with them, she can help us with housework.
I am very grateful to my mother-in-law for her kindness, but I still don’t want to live with my in-laws. My mother also advised me not to live with my parents-in-law. It sounds like my mother-in-law helps us with housework, which seems pretty good, but after living together, there will definitely be conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
04
Honey yearns for freedom. He said that every time he lives at home, his mother-in-law always cares about this and that, and he feels very annoyed. If he lives with his in-laws every day, he will be annoyed by his mother-in-law, so he thinks the same as me, and we have to live alone.
In the end, my mother-in-law had no choice but to agree to let us pass it alone. Our family was afraid that she felt sorry for the money for buying a house, so she took the initiative to propose a joint venture to buy a house, and the renovation cost was half the money for the whole family.
I am the only daughter of the family. It doesn’t matter if I get married or not. Anyway, I will support my parents in the future. So our family didn't ask for the bride price and couldn't get a dowry. The two families bought a wedding house together, and the names of the two people were written on the property certificate.
Our wedding was held in a hotel. We hired a wedding company and it was held very grandly. My husband and I were very satisfied. After marriage, we lived in the new house, and our parents lived in their old house.
My husband and I discussed that we will do housework together. We don’t know anything about it anyway, so we will learn to do it together, and no one will laugh at anyone. The next day after we got married, we went to buy a cookbook and prepared to learn how to cook. The two of us also divided the work, such as who was washing clothes, who was washing dishes, who mopping the floor, etc.
05
Unexpectedly, on the third day after marriage, my mother-in-law suddenly moved to our house to live.She said she was feeling uncomfortable because our home was close to the hospital. If she lived here, it would be more convenient to go to the hospital. I asked my mother-in-law where she felt uncomfortable and if I wanted me to accompany her to the hospital?
My mother-in-law said I didn’t need to accompany her. As for what disease it was, she stammered and couldn’t tell the reason. I didn't continue asking, thinking that she might have something unspeakable, so I'm sorry to say it out!
But then I realized that she was not sick at all and came to set rules for me, for fear that her baby son would suffer. My mother-in-law was doing something uncomfortable, so she ordered me to do this and that.
Originally, my husband and I agreed that I would do some housework and some housework he would do. So when my mother-in-law instructed me to do housework, I let my husband do some housework, and my mother-in-law was very unhappy. She said she asked me to do it, how could I ask my husband to do it? If this is the case, she will ask her husband to do it.
I told her that my husband and I have a division of labor and we have already discussed it. My mother-in-law scolded me, saying that there was no one who lets men do housework? A man is getting poorer and poorer when he does housework. But her son has never done housework since he was a child. How can he have to do housework when he gets married? Doesn’t this reduce the quality of life?
06
I think it's really funny. My husband does housework after marriage, which is a way to reduce the quality of life, so he can't do housework. Then what's wrong with me doing housework? I don’t do housework before getting married, so how can I reduce my quality of life?
So I had a conflict with my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law accused me of not knowing how to respect the elderly. How can a daughter-in-law be like this? My mother-in-law set rules for me, asking me to get up at 6 o'clock every day, prepare breakfast, serve her and her husband after eating, clean up before going to work.
I have to buy vegetables on the way back from get off work, and I will cook when I get home. After the family had dinner, I had to clean the kitchen, then wash clothes and mop the floor, etc., and finish all the housework before I could enter the room to rest.
In order not to let my husband help me, my mother-in-law deliberately called her out, such as asking her to give her a massage, watch TV with her, teach her to use her mobile phone, etc. In order to calm down, I didn’t want to argue with my mother-in-law. I thought that she would leave in a few days anyway, so I’ll endure it!
resulted in two weeks, and I was so tired that I felt very tired. My mother-in-law still thought that I was not doing well, but that was not doing well. It seems like I am just an idiot, I can’t do anything well, and nothing I do can satisfy my mother-in-law.
07
The husband was originally very active in doing the housework he was assigned, but because of the arrival of his mother-in-law, he was blocked from doing housework. Gradually, my husband got used to it, and my mother-in-law kept brainwashing him, so he gradually lost the awareness of doing housework.
The situation at home becomes that I work for one day and I have to work hard to do housework when I get home. But my husband was very leisurely. He either accompanied his mother-in-law or played mobile games, dirty clothes and socks, and threw them everywhere.
My mother-in-law was clearly supervising me, but she said she was teaching me, as if I had to be grateful to her. She said that my mother didn't teach me housework and married me out, which was my mother's dereliction of duty. If it were in ancient times, my daughter-in-law would not even want it.
I was very angry and felt that I could not bear it anymore, so I told my husband privately, hoping that he would talk to my mother-in-law, or ask when will I go back. But my husband did nothing at all. He said that his mother-in-law is his own and she can live as long as she wants at her son's house.
After I finally waited for a month, one day my mother-in-law thought the food I made was not delicious, so I ordered takeaway. My mother-in-law immediately furiously scolded me for spending money randomly. I finally couldn't bear it anymore, so I vented all my dissatisfaction over the past month and had a big fight with my mother-in-law. I was so angry that I even filed for divorce.
After hearing that I was going to get a divorce, my mother-in-law and husband were scared. My mother-in-law went back to her home, and my husband also shared the housework with me as we agreed. If they hadn't made concessions, I would have divorced my husband.
Conclusion:
Xiao Linlin's mother-in-law is really troublesome. She insists on going to her son's house to set rules for her daughter-in-law, and almost lost her son's marriage. Originally, the son and daughter-in-law were very good, but the young couple discussed sharing the housework together, and the mother-in-law insisted on going and causing trouble.
Both husband and wife have to go to work, and the couple should share the housework. They cannot just teach women to do it alone. In ancient times, women took on all the housework because they didn’t need to go out to work, and all the work earned money was borne by men.
A woman has to earn money from work and also has to undertake all the housework. Even if she wants to, her body cannot bear it. No one is a stubborn man, a woman is not a perpetual motion machine, and a woman needs to rest.
Xiao Linlin's mother-in-law said that housework is done by women and men cannot do it, but it is actually selfish. She couldn't bear to let her son do it, so she let other people's daughter, who is her daughter-in-law, do it. She only feels sorry for her son and not for her daughter-in-law. How could her daughter-in-law like her like this?
Author: A creator in the emotional field, focusing on various issues in the emotional field, welcome to follow. Life is warmth because of love and love. Let us grow in love and spend every day in true love.
