Introduction
Anyone who own parents or parents-in-law can help you take care of your children and take care of your family. No female friend with a higher education is willing to be a full-time housewife. After all, after reading so many books, I want to have a platform to display my talents.
But if your parents and parents-in-law really can’t help you take care of your children, and you’re worried about hiring a nanny. Many female friends will definitely return to their families to choose to be full-time housewives for their children.
But in the eyes of parents, they feel that their daughter has read so many books, and then they don’t work hard and work hard to make money. Instead, they choose to take care of their children at home, and they cannot understand their daughter's approach.
42-year-old sister Qin has chosen to do full-time too big since she got married to her husband. But Sister Qin's mother could not understand her approach. The two of them often had unpleasant quarrels.
Fortunately, Sister Qin’s husband is particularly considerate of Sister Qin, otherwise the family would really not be able to live. Let’s take a look at Sister Qin’s emotional experience. For the sake of everyone's understanding, I write it in the first person.
Narrator: 42-year-old sister Qin
My name is Qin Jialin, and I am 42 years old this year. Sometimes I even doubt whether I am my mother's biological child? Because I am in my mother, I really can't feel maternal love.
On the contrary, I think my aunt loves me very much. I think my mom often hit me, and I don’t know what I did.
40 years ago I was born in a rural family. I have two sisters and two brothers in my family. I am the smallest baby in the family. My two brothers and two sisters didn't read much, so they came out of society early on.
Because my two brothers and sisters are much older than me, I see that their lives are not satisfactory. Especially their married life is really bad.
I don’t want to be like them, so I caught the life-saving straw of reading. I hope that studying can change my destiny and take me out of the small village and away from our small county town.
So I was very hardworking when I was a student. Everyone else went to play, and I was studying by myself. And I needed money to study at that time. I am not afraid of the hardship of studying, I am afraid of not having money when I pay. Because every time I go home and ask for money, my mother will show me the truth. But there is no way. I don’t ask her if she wants the money, who should I ask?
When I was in my third year of high school, I was under too much pressure and didn’t get well in the first year, so I couldn’t go to my ideal university. My mother told me to drop out of school and stop studying, and to go out to work and come back to subsidize my family. But I disagreed and said I wanted to give myself a chance, so I wanted to go to tutor for another year. But my mother disagreed, and he disagreed with taking out the money.
Later, my aunt gave me money to tutor me. At that time, the financial conditions of my aunt's family were not very good. My aunt had no daughter and she gave birth to two cousins. At that time, my aunt sold a few big pigs to piece together and collected enough tuition for me.
My aunt is really the noble person in my life. To be honest, without my aunt's support, I would not have been able to go to college, and I would not have had the current life. So I have been particularly grateful to my aunt throughout my life. Every time I go back to my hometown, I will bring a lot of gifts to my aunt because I am willing to do so.
But my mother was unhappy. She felt that my aunt didn't give birth to me, but she gave birth to me and raised me. Why am I so kind to my aunt? My mom felt my arm pulling out.
How can my mother know how much impact my aunt has on me? My mother wouldn't think so much. Without my aunt, I wouldn't have the life I have today.
After graduating from university, I found a job in Guangdong. Because I major in international economics and trade, I am engaged in the foreign trade industry. To be honest, doing foreign trade is indeed quite profitable, but it is very hard.
In the fifth year of my work, I bought a house for my parents in the county town.And every year when I go home during the Chinese New Year and holidays, I will give my parents a lot of money. But I think my mom is particularly unsatisfied. I feel that she still disliked me for giving her too little money.
Because my aunt was not in good health in those years, I paid for all the expenses for my cousin's college. I paid for my two cousins to go to college.
Sometimes I especially believe in that sentence: Sometimes helping others is equivalent to helping yourself. If my aunt hadn't helped me at the beginning, I don't think I would have helped my two cousins today.
Now both of my cousins have stable jobs and have already started a family and started a business. My cousin also took my aunt and uncle to the city to live. To be honest, my two cousins are quite filial.
In my seventh year of work, my husband and I fell in love. My husband is a local from Guangdong. My husband majored in civil engineering in college. After graduation, he worked in the company for several years, and later he accumulated experience and connections. Then he went out to open a company by himself.
Mr.’s career is quite smooth, and he also earned money from opening a company himself. Later he expanded other businesses. We have two houses in Guangzhou. A house has paid off its loan, and there is still another house being paid. Our family has two cars, each with a total of about 500,000 yuan. My husband drives one, and I drive one by myself.
Because no one helped me take care of my children. My parents-in-law are in poor health, so I dare not ask them to help me take care of my children. My mom didn't have time to help me take care of my children.
so after giving birth, I didn't have a job. I became a full-time housewife at home. My husband will bear all the miscellaneous expenses for mortgage loans and car loans, as well as the living expenses at home.
To be honest, my husband has worked very hard, but he never complains about hardship or fatigue in front of me. Because both of us know that our careers have been successful, if our children do not teach well, it is not called success.
actually to put it bluntly, that is failure. So my husband particularly supports me as a full-time housewife at home, as long as I educate our children well. No matter how hard or tired he is, he will not tell me.
But to be honest, I was working as a full-time housewife at home. In addition to being responsible for doing housework, educating children well, and picking them up and dropping them off to and from school. I also cultivate children's various interests and hobbies. The most important thing is that I still insist on studying every day.
Because I am afraid that I will be out of track with society. I am afraid that one day if I want to return to the workplace, I suddenly feel that I have been not working for too long and cannot keep up with other people's pace. So I keep studying every day.
After I got married, especially after I had children, my life was under a lot of pressure, so I didn’t have that much money for my mother. Every time my mother hinted openly and secretly that I would give her more money. My mother is particularly dissatisfied with me being a full-time housewife.
She felt that I had finally read so many books. It's been a waste of time to read so many books. In the end, I took my children to do laundry and cook at home. It would be better to not study and waste so much money. Since we have to do laundry and cook at home after all, why did we work so hard at the beginning?
But my mother didn't understand. If I hadn't worked hard at that time, I wouldn't have this platform and I would have known my husband. It’s impossible for me to have two houses in Guangdong now. It is even more impossible to have a smart couple.
I am cooking at home with my children, but I don’t think I am embarrassed. I don't want to be like a village woman of the same age as a village woman. They also do laundry and cook at home and take care of their children.
However, there is a natural difference between us and cannot be compared. But my mother doesn't understand these things, and she can't blame her. Because my mother didn't read much at all, which was the second grade of elementary school.
A few days ago, when I was videotaping with my mother, my mother always mentioned the childhood friend in the village to me. She said that I didn't read any books when I was a child, but my husband was in business. Now I earn a lot of money and go home every year, I will give my parents tens of thousands or tens of thousands of dollars.In my mother's eyes, she felt that my childhood friend was particularly successful.
My mother thinks that I am a 211 graduate from university and actually takes care of my children at home to cook. My mother felt very embarrassed. And my mother is a money fan, so she wants me to make a lot of money and give her a lot of money. Because my mother will never complain about too much money.
I think it's okay for my mother to tell me once or twice occasionally. Every time I videotape with her, she will tell me about this, which I feel very annoying. Everyone has their own way of living. Why does she always like to impose her own ideas on others?
Sometimes I even want to fight back, and I said if you have that great ability. Why don’t you earn tens of millions? Why are you still staying in a small county town? Later I held back and said, "I shouldn't have said such things, otherwise my mother would definitely get sick if I get angry.
That's how my mother thinks, I should go out and make money. And it's very good to find ways to make money. Because in my mother's subconscious mind, if she thinks that money is the most important thing, it is even more important than her life.
Actually, I am quite satisfied with my current life situation. My husband loves me more and loves me more. Sometimes I feel that I'm very sorry for my husband.
Because he worked so hard to make money, after my mother told me, I would expose my anger on my husband. But my husband doesn't argue with me or make trouble with me. He tolerated my temper, and I think this is really rare.
Besides, we have two houses in Guangzhou, and my husband also has his own career. Although we are not considered multi-millionaires, our lives are still acceptable. I don’t have to worry about not having too much meal after eating, and I don’t have to worry about paying off my mortgage.
actually I think my role is quite big. Although I have not made money in the workplace, what I do is more meaningful than making money, that is, to cultivate my children well. I think under my training, my son and daughter are better than those of the same age. I think this is my value. I don't think my university was in vain.
And while being a full-time housewife, I did not stop learning. So if my child grows up in the future and I get free time, I may return to the workplace.
If I really can't go back to the workplace, I have accumulated experience in raising children. I can write, I love writing, I can write these experiences, I can do self-media, and I feel that I won't be hungry at that time. Because these things cannot defeat me.
But if I hadn't read the book, then I wouldn't be able to write, I wouldn't be able to meet such an excellent husband, and I wouldn't be able to have such a happy life today. Everything I have today is what reading brings to me.
I don’t care what my mother says about me, and I don’t care what the people around me think of me. Anyway, I feel that I am dedicated to my family now, and not only me, but also my husband. My husband loves my two children very much. He holds us in his palms, and I think this is enough.
As for my mother's thoughts about me all day long, if you want to listen, then listen. If I don't want to listen, then I will turn on my phone there to do my own business and let her keep nagging there.
Anyway, you have to correct your mindset and life is your own. As long as the family of four lives happily, everything else is not important.
Conclusion
In fact, Sister Qin is really an excellent woman. She does her best to work at work. In life, she also educates her children very well. Although she became a full-time housewife, she did not stop learning and kept studying, which many people could not do.
But Sister Qin's mother, she doesn't understand Sister Qin. She always uses money to measure Sister Qin’s life value. Fortunately, Sister Qin has a husband who loves her. Her husband supports Sister Qin’s approach. Sister Qin and her husband are living happily now, which is enough.
If you are a mother and your daughter becomes a full-time housewife after graduating from a key university, will you support her approach? Or is it like Sister Qin's mother, who is thinking about her daughter all the time, making her hate her? You are welcome to express your views in the comment section.
Introduction Author
I am a young man in Antarctica, focusing on emotional stories, and enjoy different emotional stories every day. If you like my story
, please give me a like first, and then click
on the upper right side to "follow" to let my text warm your heart!
