01
Buffett said: "The most important investment in life is to find the right person who married you."
We have no way to deny what kind of marriage partner we choose, this is the most important step in life. If this step is wrong, then every step next is wrong. As the saying goes, a woman will ruin her life if she marrys a wrong person, and a man will ruin her life if she marrys a wrong person. Not an exaggeration at all.
Maybe, young people nowadays understand and are beginning to take the marriage carefully.
However, what is their "caution"? For example: When it comes to marriage, I must not settle for it. Low-quality marriages are not as good as high-quality singles, , so it is impossible to get married if you can't find a "suitable" person.
In fact, I also understand everyone's yearning and longing for a suitable marriage. The kind of marriage life, which is the same as the same interests and hobbies, you bring water to the garden, your thoughts and views are highly consistent, and even your every move is the same, is really romantic and beautiful. But the reality is that the normal state of marriage life is the food, oil and salt, and the mess.
And in this world, there are no two people who are absolutely suitable and perfectly fit. Even if someone is very lucky to meet such a person, it doesn’t mean that everyone can meet him.
For most ordinary people, We can only accept imperfect lives and marriages.
Although people with a little spiritual height and realm can live a happy life, it is because they know how to discover and capture those little happiness from the real life of existence. It is also because we can maintain inner peace and not have too high expectations, and then find a balance point in infinite needs and limited harvests.
So there is a heartbreaking truth. In this world, there are no two exactly the same leaves, and there are no two exactly the same people.
Each of us is a unique individual. You have your thoughts, I have my three views; you have your temper, I have my personality. Absolutely suitable is an ideal, and seeking common ground while reserving differences is a reality.
As He Jiong said:
"If you suddenly meet someone and are perfectly adapted to you, he is particularly accommodating and considerate of you, you must be careful. There is no such person in this world, don't believe in fairy tales so much."
02
02
Know a man who specializes in mediation. In her own words, whenever she is a matchmaker, is most afraid of hearing the other party mention the "suitable" requirement.
So slowly she felt that is dishonest for anyone who often talks about "suitable" or always finds a marriage partner based on "suitable" as the standard. For such a person, she also felt from the bottom of her heart that it is not suitable for marriage for the time being, so as not to get the head to harm others and yourself. Why do you say that?
For example, if you find her someone with the conditions, you will choose the appearance in the end; if you find her a good-looking person, you will choose the family in the end; if you find her a good-looking person, you will choose the education in the end. Anyway, no matter how you look for it, she can always pick a "inappropriate" place in the end.
implicitly, and they don’t know what they really want. In other words, behind the "suitability", there are too many hidden requirements.
These too many implicit requirements also largely reflect their overly perfectionist heart. Ideals are good, but the reality is, can you find someone who meets your standards or presets in all aspects?
Therefore, we always look for a marriage partner based on "suitable" and we can't find it at all. Even if you enter into marriage, you will soon be disappointed and will not last long.
If you want to get married, you must first clarify your wishes and needs, and you must never be biased by other people's opinions and remarks.We want to plan something for our partner, because this is the source of enthusiasm and action, , but only the same as the picture.
Either you want to find someone who likes it, or you want to find someone who is talented, or you want to find someone who is romantic, or you want to find someone who is good at home, or you want to find someone who is able to give you a stable life. Anything can be done in the picture, and it is not an exaggeration to want anything, but you can only have the same picture.
requires both handsomeness, talent, and romance. Have you ever thought that even if the other party can meet the requirements, will we deserve it?
The meaning you want to express is very simple. You must first determine what you need, and you cannot be ambiguous or ambiguity. If you choose what you want, you must be able to keep your heart and not ask for anything else. Or since you have achieved what you want, you must be able to accept his other shortcomings.
Only in this way can you find a truly suitable person, and it will also help you manage and maintain your marriage in the future.
03
Don't believe it, the older you are, the harder you get married. For marriage, it still requires impulse, or it always requires a little impulse. But as people get older, they will live more rationally. As they have seen more things, it will be even more difficult to get moved.
And as you get older, you will think more and more things. What does it mean? There are also more things to ask for, so getting married has become more difficult.
Seeing that everyone is getting married late, you blindly follow the trend. I never thought about what people might be pursuing in being single, and what about you? He dragged himself up in a confused way.
is, you always don’t know what you want, and you can’t clarify your wishes. Then day after day, year after year, who can save you? So there is a kind of ups and downs on the road to marriage, which is caused by oneself.
has two sentences that express the realistic side of marriage.
First: No matter who we marry, we will regret it; second, no matter who we marry, we will regret it. It is wrong to choose marriage, and a long-term marriage is to make mistakes. objectively understands it not that marriage is not worth it, but that in this world, there is no absolutely happy marriage at all, and there is no perfect fit partner at all.
First correct your attitude and correctly recognize marriage, and then it is possible to be still cute and happy in an imperfect life.
-END-
