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middle-aged couples, gradually seeing through many things and the truth about marriage.
Once upon a time, we thought that marriage was the whole support of life. As long as we chose the right person, we could have no worries in our lives and no more storms. But as we live, we find that people will change and feelings will change. The person who once had 100% trust and was completely entrusted to life may also disappoint us and bring us wind and frost.
At this time, you have to abandon your past innocence and simplicity and know how to leave a way out for yourself.
Middle-aged couples, don’t overestimate the person next to you. There are a few things you should pay special attention to. This is not about playing tricks on the other party, but about giving yourself more security and a sense of security in the future.
1: Don’t over-rely rely on your partner, you must have the ability to live independently
There are many people in life who are always over-reliant on their partner. It seems that without him, you will not be able to survive. If he loves you, it is your luck. What if he doesn’t love you one day? You may never be able to survive alone again.
Luo Zijun in the TV series " My First Half of Life ", that's the case.
Before the divorce, she was completely out of touch with society and was raised by her ex-husband alone. However, later her ex-husband fell in love with her and her marriage broke down. Only then did she suddenly realize that no one would always shelter her from the wind and rain, and the only thing she could rely on was herself in the end.
Since then, she tried to stand up and start looking for a job to support herself and her son. It was also from that time that she saw through the truth of her marriage and finally stopped relying on her and no longer relied on her.
In fact, before middle age comes, we should have this awareness. If you marry someone and enter a relationship, it does not mean that this person and this relationship have become your lifelong support.
Your life is still yours after all. Only by learning to be independent can you not be afraid of losing.
2: Have a strong heart, keep independent spiritually, and live out your own
Some women may say that they also know that financial independence is important, but for the sake of their family, they cannot go out to work. If they go out, who will raise their children? Who cares for the elderly? Who will do the housework at home?
Of course, men can do it, but men earn more than themselves. Wouldn’t it be more cost-effective if they quit their job and return to their family? After comprehensive weighing, going home by yourself is the best choice.
Since this is the case, let yourself have a strong heart, stay independent in spirit, and live your own life resolutely. Make it clear to the man that he quit his job for his family and that he should not think that he has paid less for the family and made less contributions, so that he looks down on himself just because he has lost his income.
This is unfair and unreasonable.
As long as you maintain this soberness and confidence, you can earn back your dignity in front of a man, let him see and be grateful for your efforts, instead of ignoring your value and thinking that you are useless.
3: Have your own life, have interests, hobbies and social circles, and work hard to live a wonderful life
Many people start to revolve around their families, men, and children after getting married, without themselves at all. At first you may be willing, but gradually, you will find that your spirit becomes very fragile.
Whenever a man speaks to you a louder voice, you will feel insecure whenever you hear any rumors outside. You can't help but wonder, what if a man betrays himself? What if the marriage cannot be preserved?
At this time, I seemed to have been out of society for too long and had no ability to live independently.
In fact, it is normal to have such an idea. When a person lives without himself, he will often worry about gains and losses.If you want to solve this situation, you must have your own life, your own interests, hobbies and social circles. This will not only regain confidence, but also give your spirit a sustenance.
Only when you make your life richer and your heart fuller can you not often feel hopeless and unable to find the joy of life.
at the end:
When people reach middle age, don’t pin all their hopes in life on marriage. People in marriage may betray you, but you won’t. So find the focus of life, know how to love yourself, and rely on yourself in everything, and you will live a more secure and confident life.
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