That night, Jiang Tianxiao chatted with me with a text message on his mobile phone for a long time.
That night, my colleague was working at night, and I was alone at the bedside of the dormitory to proofread the manuscript (at that time, I did text proofreading for a magazine in my hometown part-time). He took the initiative to send me a text message first. When I first read it, I felt a moment of trance:
"I miss you, I know I can't think about it, but I still have to think about it, I miss you."
I don't understand why he suddenly said this, and why I can't feel his sincerity? I took a deep breath and tried my best to suppress my excitement. After a while, I wrote: "Thank you."
"I'm very idle tonight. I want to talk to you, Netbird, how about going out for fun? "
" Where is it?"
" Nanxing has opened a hot spring. How about going there? The water there is clean."
I smiled: Take me to wash the hot spring? Who did he think of me! So I said, "I'm sorry, I can't go."
"You're scared, haha."
"No, I'm not available tonight, I want to proofread the article."
"So you are a teacher, I'm not respectful."
I felt a little sad: "I don't have the life to be a teacher. It's not to correct the article, but to proofread it."
"Tell me where you proofread it? I'll pack it for you, what do you want to eat?"
"I'm not hungry now."
"Are you proofreading it in the office?"
"No."
"Are you proofreading it in the office?"
"No."
"At home?" "
" is not. "
" Not in the office nor at home? I feel more and more terrible. "
I feel sad. It turns out that he has never trusted me: "In your mind, am I a terrible woman? The first time someone said I am scary." "
" Then where are you? Why are you so mysterious?"
"I'm in the dormitory." I took my time out.
He suddenly wrote an inexplicable sentence, which I couldn't understand no matter how I read it, so he told him the truth: "What are you writing?"
"You are not a 4 person from Chaozhou html. I think you should be a talented woman working in other provinces."
It turns out that he used Chaozhou local dialect to write text messages, no wonder I couldn't understand a word.
Why does he have to know who I am? Did my existence make him think so many times? I was almost disappointed, disappointed for him and myself: "I am from Guangdong."
Jiang Tianxiao wrote another sentence, and I could tell it was in vernacular dialect. I suddenly felt inexplicably tired, and the thought of his suspicion made me very sad, but I didn't say this, just sent a text message: "I am from Guangdong, of course I can understand the vernacular."
He did not answer.
After about an hour, I sent him a text message:
The reason why love is beautiful is because there is a star of parting in the depths of love;
The reason why text messages are charming is because there is also a true heart behind the text message;
The reason why you don’t want to respond to me is because you have never put your heart in mind;
The reason why I don’t want to see you is because I know you have no heart.
Jiang Tianxiao replied to the text message: "You have the heart, I don't have the heart?! Haha, if you have the heart, you answer the phone. Show me the proof."
His phone came, and I stared at the phone that couldn't shake, and did nothing.
I said, "If I have no intention, there will be no information; if I have no intention, the sky will sigh. But I won't answer the phone?"
"If you have the intention, answer the phone. Show me the proof."
Jiang Tianxiao's phone came, and I stared at the phone that couldn't shake, and did nothing.
I said, "If I have no intention, there will be no information; if I have no intention, the sky will sigh. But I don't answer the phone. I want to go to the county party committee to submit the documents tomorrow, but don't be happy, it's not your place."
I didn't tell him: I went to the Federation of Literary and Art Circles and handed over the proofreaded manuscript, not the document - I didn't dare to tell him, if he knew that I was proofreading the article, he would soon know who I was.
He remained silent again, what was he thinking?
When I went to work the next day, he saw him again, and he was pondering again, so he said to him:
"I saw you pondering again, you were really good when you ponder, but what are you thinking? I don't know.Maybe, you are calm on the surface and your heart is turbulent. It is best not to have someone by your side at this time, otherwise you may be "inflicted"? Right? "
At that time, I saw his face change a little, and his brows frowned even more. I was confused and understood that I was saying the wrong thing.
But I didn't understand the seriousness of the problem at that time. After all, I was too young and too ignorant of human nature: would I feel scared if a person finds a stranger who knows him so well? Maybe I won't be afraid, because I have a clear conscience in doing things, but he is different.
A few days later, he often sent me text messages, just to find out when I eat and when I go to work and get off work. I understand his purpose, and I have always avoided others.
Once he asked me who I was? I replied to a text message to him: "You are good at eloquence, I like words, I know you are too far away, protect my body and mind, just because of hurt, hurt my heart"--I have admitted that I am escaping , I really don't dare to see him.
"Then you don't plan to let me know who you are in your life? "
" should be like this. "
" It's really unfair to me like this. You are a cunning net bird. "
days, he said I was terrible last time, and now he added the word cunning. It is the first time I heard others say I am cunning.
I didn't expect things to turn out like this, playing games like a cat and a mouse. When I knew this, I could no longer stop.
days, who would know how pure my motive was at the beginning, but what kind of person I became now: I secretly text him every day, but I dare not let him know who I am? I want to let go and not send text messages, but I was manipulated by an unexplained feeling. This is a feeling of being chasing and messy.
I know that this is not good, and I am playing with fire, and I still let it indulge in it. If I let go, maybe what happened next, but I couldn't give up. Am I crazy? Knowing that he doesn't like me, I can be sure that he won't like me. He has always doubted me. This suspicion makes him really unable to raise feelings to love.
But he still calls me from time to time, and I don't answer - I know he is angry, the more he gets angry, the less I dare to answer the phone. If he knows who I am and ignores me or even hates me, will I still have the face to see him in the future? When I send him a message, he doesn't reply much.
This helpless state lasted for more than three weeks. Life continues like this, I can't find a way out, he can't find the exit, we are thrown to each other, and we return from each other.
Until one day he calls me, I don't answer, Then he sent him a text message saying, asking him to forgive me for not answering the phone and not having any objections to me.
He replied to the message and said, "You are playing tricks on me." My opinion on you is as big as the opinion of the Chinese people on the Japanese occupying Diaoyu Islands . "
I was silent.
Someone came to me, so I put the matter aside.
When I came back, I found a message from him: Do you know Lenin's prank clan?
"The whole cup clan? "I was confused and confused.
He didn't answer me, I was thinking about the meaning of this sentence all night.
Another afternoon, he called me about ten calls in a row, and when I sent me a text message to answer the phone, I didn't dare to answer it, just sent him a text message, he said to me again at night: "Do you know Lenin's prank clan? "
" whole group? "I'm still confused - Sometimes people are just weird. After their thinking is fixed, they are prone to make mistakes.
"It's not a cup, it's a Gu. ” He pointed out the key point.
I understand: “Do you think I am a Gu? "
" If you are Gu, I am the Demon Lord. You will dance around tonight, aren’t you afraid? "
" Demon Lord, I am not afraid of you, I am not afraid at all. The bright and clear moon is as deep as me, and the demon will never bear to deceive each other. "
" You are very confident. Time, mountain demon, a strong man dances in front of you, you will lose sleep tonight, because the Demon Lord will not let you live."
" The God of Time will bless me and let me spend tonight safely. I will definitely get up early tomorrow. "
" Will you go to morning shift tomorrow? "
" is right. "
" Are you working in a restaurant? "I was shocked: Oh my God, once he knew I was from a restaurant, he would soon know who I was, because there were not many employees with mobile phones at that time, and there were really not many: "No." "
" OK, go to bed quickly. It's better to turn off the phone, otherwise I will annoy you tonight. "
" I don't shut down. Because I'm not afraid of you. ”
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