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Yes, we feel that marriage limits our freedom. We hope that after getting married, we can be as free as we were before we were not married, but we have forgotten, What does it mean to get married and start a family?
Getting married and starting a family means that we have truly matured. As a mature adult, the first task after getting married is to improve our sense of responsibility. In other words: "Learn to take care of the family."
What is Gujia? Go out to play with friends, know the time, don't go home too late, and don't let your partner or your children worry, this is family care.
Therefore, from the perspective of "maturity", the constraints in marriage are not constraints on a person, but an improvement in a person's sense of responsibility, which is what every mature adult should have. Self-discipline.”
And when our partner calls us to urge us to go home, what we should think of is not "being bound" or "having no freedom", but "being cared about" or "being concerned about". To put it another way, , if the other half does not take us to heart, will she (he) still call us to urge us to go home?
Having talked about this, if you still feel that "the constraints in marriage are restricting our freedom," we might as well assume that if we can still be as free as we were before we got married, what would it be like? ?
If we are as free after marriage as we were before marriage, we can go out with friends and come home whenever we want, without anyone urging us, and we can have a lot of fun.
But, similarly, no matter whether the weather is good or bad, and no matter what the situation is, we will also lose the care and concern of the other half, and once this freedom becomes a habit, love will disappear. The feelings between each other will also become weaker and weaker.
If we are as free after marriage as we were before marriage, our partner will not urge us to go home. Even if today is our birthday, even if today is our wedding anniversary, we will not receive warm wishes from our partner, let alone receive another Half of the gifts are given because we have gained freedom, so we will lose the corresponding care. Will such a marriage last long?
Yes, we want to be loved and cared for by others, but we also want to have absolute freedom. This is a whimsical thing in itself, because in everything, there are trade-offs, and this is true for career, and so is love.
Therefore, the bondage in marriage is not a bondage, but some caring and caring behaviors that one person shows because he loves another person. It is a manifestation of caring.
Changyan Changyu:
The bondage in marriage is not bondage, but love. Loving a person is caring and caring for a person, and it is also a greeting and urging to a person. Therefore, when the other half urges us to go home, it is not restricting our freedom, but caring about our safety, and it is harmful to us. A kind of care.
The bondage in marriage is not a bondage, but if we think that a marriage where "no one cares and cares" is the marriage we want, then marriage is a bondage to us, and the kind of marriage we want is also It doesn't make any sense.
Marriage is not a restriction of freedom, but an improvement of responsibility. It is the beginning of our true maturity. There are bound to be choices in life, and the same is true for marriage. If you want to get love and happiness, you have to give up. considered "absolute freedom".
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I am Changtan Shengsheng, a member of the Family Education Bureau, focusing on family emotions and various aspects of life. Together, we use our experiences to convey positive energy (new posts are posted on time at 7:30 every morning)!
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original author: Changtansheng
starting platform: Toutiao
