Host Jin Xing once said: "The witness of marriage is not the ring, but the bed." I don't know when, people who once loved each other sweetly gradually became alienated and became so strange. From the initial inseparability, to now lying on both sides of the bed, back to back, eac

Host Jin Xing once said: "The witness of marriage is not the ring, but the bed."

I don't know when it started, but people who once loved each other sweetly gradually became alienated and became so strange. From the initial inseparability, to now lying on both sides of the bed, back to back, each sleeping on his own, there is no emotional ups and downs, and no physical discomfort. Even though they were still lying on the same bed, they stayed far away from each other's body.

As a saying goes, The distance on the bed is the distance between the hearts.

The male protagonist in today’s story was dissatisfied because his wife always kept a distance from her, so he kicked his wife off the bed.

01 A couple quarreled at the end of the bed and could not reconcile without being together.

Event review: The woman in the video who complained that her husband did not respect her was named Zhang Min (pseudonym). She and her husband Yang Xiong (pseudonym) were a remarried couple. The newly married couple The relationship between husband and wife had been very good for several years, but starting from the third year, the conflicts between the two became more and more serious because of the disharmony in their married life. This time, the husband kicked her out after she refused. Kicked out of bed.

Talking about the relationship between the two people, Yang Xiong said angrily that in the first year or two of their marriage, they had a good relationship, but it was only because his wife was obsessed with playing games that she began to reject him frequently. Yang Xiong said that his work schedule is usually to go to bed early and get up early, but his wife has to play games until after 11 o'clock in the evening. In addition, she has to apply various weight loss plasters on her body in the morning. As a result, their relationship There was no chance for communication at all. Every time he touched his wife, he would be ruthlessly rejected.

It is precisely because of his wife's indifferent attitude that Yang Xiong has more and more complaints in his heart. In his opinion, normal communication between husband and wife is the foundation for maintaining the relationship between husband and wife, but his wife always treats it as a burden, making it difficult for him to accept.

In addition, what makes Yang Xiong even more uncomfortable is that every time his wife rejects him, she will say some unpleasant words to hurt him. As a man, he feels that his self-esteem has been hurt. Yang Xiong said that he and his wife have both been married. The only difference is that his wife is married for the second time and he is married for the third time. Because he is 9 years older than his wife, and he has experienced two failed marriages in a row, he has no relationship with him. His wife Zhang Min is naturally a treasure, but his wife does not understand his feelings at all, and instead uses it to slander himself.

It turns out that Yang Xiong’s home is a 4-story private house. After divorcing his ex-wife, his first two wives lived downstairs, while he and his current wife lived on the third floor, so his wife always teased him: "No. One wife lives on the first floor, the second wife lives on the second floor, now we live on the third floor, and your fourth wife goes to the fourth floor."

Regarding the words that slandered her husband, Zhang Min explained She said that these were all words she usually said when joking with her husband, and there was no malicious intent. And the reason why she started to reject her husband was because he didn't respect her at all. Sometimes she and her husband had conflicts. They agreed to calm down first, but at night, her husband came directly and asked to be with her. If she didn't agree, Her husband likes to force herself. Her husband's unprincipled behavior makes her feel disgusted, so she rejects him.

The couple had a bedside quarrel. Yang Xiong wanted to calm his wife down in this way, but what he didn't expect was that it was self-defeating. Instead of calming down, his wife felt that he didn't respect her, so she resented him even more.

Talking about how husband and wife get along, Zhang Min said that her classmates also advised her not to always reject her husband in this regard, otherwise it would affect the relationship between husband and wife. However, she understood the truth, but her husband's way of not caring about her own feelings made her uncomfortable. She couldn't accept it. In Zhang Min's view, she is not a puppet on a string. Married life should be a voluntary interaction between both parties. However, her husband never seeks her opinion and always insists on his own way, which makes her very disgusted.

02 The way my husband loves me is suffocating

Since there are such big differences between husband and wife in terms of work and rest time and concepts of getting along, how did they get together in the first place?

Looking back on the past, Zhang Min said that her husband divorced his first wife after he got together with his second wife, which was equivalent to cheating in marriage. The second wife was locked up because of her own mistakes, so the husband filed for divorce. , when they first met, her husband really doted on her, which was why she divorced her ex-husband and got together with her husband. But now he has become inconsiderate and seems a bit chauvinistic in every aspect. This kind of The desire to control makes me feel suffocated.

Regarding his wife's statement, Yang Xiong has always explained that he cares about his wife so much that he takes her very seriously. The main reason why his wife is so willful is that he has spoiled her.

When talking about a detail of getting along, Zhang Min said that one time she clearly rejected her husband, but he still wanted to hug her. In the end, she could only get up at about three o'clock in the middle of the night and sat there until dawn, when she heard her wife talk about this incident. , Yang Xiong was so angry that he directly asked his wife: "What's wrong with hugging you?"

It is precisely because there are too many differences in getting along, and the quarrels between husband and wife are becoming more and more frequent. The more Yang Xiong goes, As the relationship progressed, Zhang Min's reaction became more intense. In the end, the resentment between the two parties accumulated towards each other, directly leading to divorce.

Regarding this marriage, Zhang Min cried and said that after several years of hard work, although her material conditions were getting better and better, it was precisely because of her husband's high-demand control that she was under greater mental pressure than before. Her husband may have just kicked the bed, but now if she disagrees, she will be kicked out of the bed directly, leaving her with no dignity or happiness at all.

Hearing his wife's cry, Yang Xiong was confused. He never thought that his wife would divorce him because of these things. In his opinion, among his three wives, this marriage was the one he paid the most for, and his current wife is also his The most precious thing, but he never expected that his wife would regard his love as a burden and normal married life as a shackles. Recalling the first time the two met, Yang Xiong said that he and his wife could read each other's thoughts with just one look, but now the gap is getting deeper and deeper.

After the mediator's persuasion, both Zhang Min and Yang Xiong expressed their concerns about each other and their truest thoughts. After learning about Yang Xiong's deep feelings for her, Zhang Min finally decided to give in and give each other some time. Calm down, and Yang Xiong also promised that he would fully respect his wife's opinions this time and would not force her to do anything he didn't want to do again.

03 Husbands and wives should be both close to each other and independent from each other.

In the American drama "Sex and the City", there is a saying: "How we perform in bed indicates how we live our lives."

Food and sex are also, Although conjugal life is not the only bond that maintains marriage, it is an indispensable part of marriage. It almost occupies the most critical part of marriage. The bed is the place where the relationship between lovers is kept warm and heated. A bed is not big, but it is It carries the deep affection between two people. If it is handled well, it will make the marriage more beautiful, but if it is not handled well, it will cause a loss of trust between the couple and create an irreparable situation.

True love is not about wanting to entangle the other person all the time, but being able to be by the other person's side all the time, no matter what you do. For Yang Xiong, the love he understands is to be "together" all the time, but for Zhang Min, such love makes her feel burdened. Although husband and wife should be intimate, they should also leave boundaries. They should embrace and depend on each other, but they should also be able to separate from each other and respect each other.

Looking at most emotions, we find that in this fast food era, there are always many people getting married in a hurry and quickly ending in divorce. The reason is that after getting along for a long time, they became less and less passionate. Later, they were too lazy to communicate, and even disliked each other. They no longer wanted to have close contact with each other. Even if they slept in the same bed, they would do it back to back, and no one would talk to the other.

Every relationship will eventually become dull after a certain period of time. It will not always be full of romance and passion, but dullness does not mean boredom.

For Zhang Min, perhaps after the passion, she longed for her own space more, but her too direct way of rejection hurt Yang Xiong's self-esteem, and even made him feel that there was a problem with their relationship, so the way of communication between husband and wife Directly determines the temperature of marriage.

There is an old saying: In the Hall of Eternal Life on July 7th, in the middle of the night when no one is whispering.

Two people who love each other will make love in bed, express their feelings to each other in bed, and share the intimate time that only belongs to each other after being busy. Between husband and wife, good communication is always the best medicine to resolve conflicts and misunderstandings at any time.

Today’s topic discussion: What do you think of the way Yang Xiong and Zhang Min handle the problem?

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