01
After the start of this semester, my son’s school teacher asked the children to bring a tablet to the school because they often need to use Internet resources in class. The teacher promised to limit the time and purpose of the children's use of the tablet. So my son took the iPad at home.
After school one day last week, he said to me: Dad, I can only use the apps specified by the teachers on my iPad, and I can’t use other apps. The only one in the class is my iPad. of.
I said: Yes. I have added some restrictions to your iPad. You can only use the apps specified by the teacher. Do you know why the restrictions are imposed on you?
My son said: I know. You are afraid that I can't control it and play the game secretly.
I said: Well, do other students in the school secretly play games?
He said: Yes! a lot of. They often open to play while the teacher is not paying attention, and almost all of their iPads are games.
I said: Is it appropriate to play games in school?
He said categorically: inappropriate.
I ask: What games do your classmates play in school?
He said: Almost every boy pretends to "eat chicken".Sometimes they play chicken. Another classmate told me that he has played all the games, as long as I have played them, he must have played them.
I said: I guess, you have played the game, he is afraid that he has not played any of the games.
My son laughed and said triumphantly: That's how I told him at the time. I immediately said the names of several programming games and asked him if he had played them? He said, ah~~~, what game is that?
I said: Why do I not let you play "Chicken Eating", do you know?
He said: Well, is it because eating chicken is not a puzzle game?
I said: yes. The main function of games is entertainment, and we people need entertainment. The games you play are all selected by me. They are not only entertaining, but also beneficial to wisdom. So the games you play can make you smarter while entertaining. If the entire role of a game is entertainment, it is not suitable for children, and playing too much will have side effects. Games like eating chicken are full of violence and blood, and the side effects are particularly serious.
He asked: Where is violence and blood in eating chicken?
I said: eating chicken is not a game that kills the opponent, it counts as a victory; is killed by the opponent, it counts as a defeat? These are violence and blood.Such things are not suitable for children, and in fact, they may not be 100% suitable for adults.
My son said: But why don’t the fathers of other classmates restrict them from playing these games? Is it because their father is not a programmer, don't you know how to set the iPad to restrict these?
I said: it is possible. But it is more likely that many parents may not be fully aware that video games have a negative impact on children's brain development, and video games that are not suitable for children have a particularly large impact. In addition, the fathers of many families play games themselves, so they may think that playing with their children is not a bad idea. Just like many dads smoke, they generally think that it is not a big deal for their children to smoke in the future. But, look at me, I don't play games, there is no game on my phone. Therefore, I pay special attention to this issue.
He said: Yes, yes, I have classmates who told me that their dad is still at home and play with them on the Internet to eat chicken. Dad, have you never played games since you were young?
I said: That's not it. When I was young, your grandparents also controlled me to play games. Although there are special game consoles at home, they can only be played during winter and summer vacations. Later, after I went to college, I studied computer, so I had my own computer. And I go to school in Beijing, and my grandparents are in my hometown, so nobody cares about me. So I played a lot of games for half a year and a year. But suddenly one day, I realized a serious problem. I spent so much time playing games and I had less time to study, which would delay my study. I have many classmates who play games every day and do not attend classes, which leads to failing exams and even dropping out of school. I can’t be like them. So, I deleted all the games on my computer. Then I almost stopped playing.
My son asked: Why do you delete them all? Can you not play normally?
I said: video game is easy to addicted,It is especially easy for men to indulge. This is a conclusion that has been confirmed by scientific research. Although I was about 20 years old at that time, I was more self-controlling than 8 or 9-year-old children, but there was still a big risk. I thought at the time, I use my computer every day, and when I see games on the computer, I can’t help controlling myself, so I just delete them all and don’t install them in the future. This way, the risk of me indulging in games is even smaller. This practice has continued from then until now. You are also a male, so your risk of indulging in games is also high. I have to control this aspect of you. As you grow older, your self-control will become stronger and stronger. When you grow up in the future, you don't need me to control you. You can control yourself.
He said: It is true that almost all boys in the class love to play games, and only one girl plays chicken.
I ask: Although games like eating chicken can indeed bring some happiness to people, you think, it’s more joy to kill your opponent to win while eating chicken? Or is it more happier to be sweating and training hard every day to prepare for the match, and then to win the gold medal in the jiu-jitsu competition?
My son sneered and said with a slight contempt: Do you still need to ask? Compared with winning the gold medal in the game, what kind of happiness does eating chicken make? (Sorry! He was watching The Water Margin recently, so he said a swear word in the Water Margin, haha)
02
The conversations about video games like the above, since my son was 4 years old, I can’t count it. How many times has he talked? It's okay to say that it's brainwashing.
Regarding the negative impact of video games on minors,There may be some controversies a few years ago, but in recent years, the controversies in the academic world may have specific negative effects.
is a good The following picture is taken from the website of the American Academy of Pediatrics:
7span _span2p A small number of children find it difficult to control their play time. What kind of children are still studying at greater risk and why? In a six-year study, researchers noticed that 10% of adolescents had unhealthy symptoms when playing games. These children have the following three things in common:
- are more likely to be boys
- They do not hesitate to sacrifice homework, sleep time, sports, family relations, social activities, etc.
- As they spend too much time on their mobile phones, they may experience problems such as depression, anxiety, shyness, and aggressiveness.
This is because video games are similar to gambling and can stimulate the reward mechanism in the human brain. Game companies often hire psychologists to design games to allow players to play games for a long time. 』
on how parents restrain their children from playing video games,The American Academy of Pediatrics has the following suggestions:
Let me simply translate:
- . Ensure that the time of electronic games does not encroach on the time of important activities such as homework and sports.
- Be vigilant about what games your child is playing.
- Let children play in the common area of the house, not in their own room. (To put it plainly, it is convenient for parents to monitor)
- Parents and children play games together and set a good example. For example, restrict play time
- guide children to pay attention to real-world games.
03
Let’s look back at this recent conversation between my son and me.
First of all, my son asked me to restrict his iPad to only the prescribed APP, but other students did not have this restriction.Obviously a small complaint. I do not evade such complaints, but lead the topic to other areas. Is suitable for playing games at school, for example?
Secondly, in this era, it is very difficult for children not to play games at all, and if the control is too strict, it is easy for children to have rebellion, and there may be greater rebound in the future. So, after my son was 4 years old, he actually went to and I consciously arranged for him to play some games. During his three years of 4~6 years old, he can play about three or four times a week, each time for 20 to 30 minutes. Originally, this frequency was intended to be maintained, but when he was 7 years old, he discovered that he was short-sighted, so the time for video games, which was not much, had to be greatly reduced. He also understood this.
Third, although my son plays games, all the games that has played are all that I have screened. Without exception, all are puzzle games, and they are all more brain-intensive. On the one hand, educational games have more positive effects on children; on the other hand, they are often very tiring to play. It really allows children to play for a long time, and he can't play for a long time, which is equivalent to controlling the negative effects. At the same time, after many years of edification (brainwashing), in his mind, playing puzzle games is different, cool, and superior to eating chicken. In this way, he will not be in social interaction with his classmates, because he does not play the same game with his classmates, and is psychologically dwarfed.
Fourth, children are getting older, and one day they will leave their parents and be out of parental control. Therefore, the hazards of video games must be instilled from an early age. I showed up and talked about how I indulged in my school days, and how I got rid of it. These can shorten the distance between me and the child, and make the child feel that Dad is also an ordinary person, and it is easier to listen to it.And these are not made up by me, they are indeed my personal feelings.
Fifth, arranges other activities that are valuable and interesting for the children themselves. For example, my home arranges a lot of sports. This not only occupies a considerable proportion of the child's spare time, but also makes the child have something that he thinks is very important. Then there is not much time left for video games.
sixth, parents lead by example. For example, I hardly play games, and indeed there is no game on my phone. In recent years, in order to find suitable games for my children, I have only played some of them, but I don’t even play in front of my children. I choose to install them for my children, and I delete the others. I never play them. . In this way, children will subtly feel that not playing games is a normal life.
04
I am a programmer, and I work with computers and mobile phones every day. Computers and mobile phones are the guys I eat. I am full of affection for them!
However, since the birth of my son, I am very clear- I will definitely restrict him. Not only to restrict electronic games, but to restrict the use of electronic devices.
Of course, I know that children will grow up slowly, and these restrictions will gradually weaken until they disappear. Therefore, to plan ahead, brainwashing children from an early age is the same as brainwashing children from an early age to stay away from pornography, gambling, and drugs.
As for my son when he grows up,After living completely independently, can you really control yourself? I'm not sure. But I think that the things I instilled in him when he was young can reduce his probability of indulging in games in the future.
The above, I hope you can refer to it!
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