Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message "I want to give you a better life

2021/10/0923:40:22 funny 2503

The boy said to the girl: "Why do you save so much?" The girl said, "I'm afraid that I will spend you poor and I won't be able to marry me in the future." The boy said, "If we are not together in the future, then you are not at a loss "The girl said: "Then you can't mess around. In case other girls are big-handed, you can't afford to marry. I have to save for you. I can't make you bachelor."

The first day to go to college to report At that time, my dad insisted on riding an electric bike to send me off. He kept sending me to the door of the bedroom and refused to leave for a long time. He kept asking me to pay attention to this and that, which made me tearful, so I took control of mine. Emotionally said: "Dad, you can rest assured to go back, your daughter has grown up." Dad hugged me tightly, crying and said: "Look if your mother gave you 2000 Twenty yuan for living expenses?" I looked at it and said, "Yes!" Dad continued: "The twenty of them are for me..."

I was late and tried a way to make an alarm clock

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

A girl from the company talked about a man on the Internet and made an appointment to elope, but she came back soon. This is how she recalled to us: that day when we packed our luggage, there was no big bag at home, so she found a snakeskin bag for pig feed, and went to the train station with half a bag of clothes. When we arrived at the train station, the man had a cross-body bag and a notebook in hand. , I carried a snakeskin bag and broke up on the spot.

So bold, really a role model in the thieves world

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

Today, I was riding a bicycle with my girlfriend and the chain fell off. I squatted down to fix it, in a panic. At this time, a BMW stopped by my side, the window was rolled down, and his girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend sat inside. He looked at me disdainfully, and asked his girlfriend, "Do you regret it?" yours,We will have it in the future! I saw his girlfriend's ex-boyfriend yelled at me, "Dad!" You see how annoying the stepmother is! "

There is a nun's nunnery on the mountain. Later, a monk built a temple on the left of the nunnery. Recently, a Taoist priest on the right of the nunnery started a civil construction view. The monk rushed over and shouted angrily: Covet my teacher too? "The head of the road, Shizuo, laughed: "Ignorance..."

In the swimming pool, the administrator shouted: "Hey, don't stand by the pool..." When I heard it, I asked: "It's okay, I'm an adult, I fell down. You can also swim, besides, which rule does not allow you to stand by the pool? "The administrator looked at my swimming trunks and frowned, "Are you embarrassed to stand here?" "I raised my chest proudly: "This is a man's normal reaction, what's the embarrassment?" "The administrator smiled: "I mean, you are so embarrassed to stand here and see?" ”

private visits on Weifu, but was attracted by the small fish stalls on the roadside

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

I heard that all of my buddies had a girlfriend, and I heard The big beauties, in order to get rid of all the people in the dormitory, everyone pooled together money to invite his girlfriend and her girlfriends to have a meal together, and met. During the dinner, the big fish, the big meat and the big beauties were all together. In order to perform well, I sucked up a bowl of snails. ...Later, I don’t know what went wrong, only the labor and management alone did not get rid of it.

The son and his girlfriend kissed goodbye at the door of the house, and the son’s father came back at the stage of investment. The father coughed when he saw the embarrassing scene at the door. With a cry, the son saw that his father was nervous and said: "Dad, do you have a mouthful too? "My father blushed and said, "No, no, I have..."

A quick way to hot buns

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

It rained a little today,The road was wet and slippery. I rode a bicycle to work. Suddenly the wheels slipped. There was a Porsche on the left and an old lady on the right. I thought it would be fine to hit the old lady with some money. The Porsche couldn’t afford it, so I hit the old lady. NS! ! ! A lot of people gathered around. At this time, the Porsche owner went down to watch the excitement. I just wanted to lose money. Who knows that the old lady grabbed the Porsche owner desperately and said: "He hit, he hit!"

In the evening, I went from I took out the suit that I gave my brother the best man two years ago in the closet, then put on a pair of leather shoes, took out a bag from the closet, and the world, just walked to the hall, my mother walked out of the kitchen and asked me what to do, I Speaking of meeting someone, she said that your kid finally got the hang of it, and then gave me 2,000 yuan. Speaking of it, you can go home or not tonight. As soon as I walked out the door, I screamed in my heart, Celia, I'm here.

It is good to have a daughter-in-law with a personal post. If you want to eat instant noodles, you can add vegetables

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

Li Yuanji and call them to Shimin and Li Yuanji . Li Yuan: "Chengcheng, Minmin, Jiji, the emperor issued the imperial decree. The parents call the son's son. You must repeat the sound. Oh, what can I do?" Jiancheng: "Father, isn't it kind of called that way!" Li Yuan: "It's easy to call you guys, just to call your fourth brother. It feels a bit inferior!"

On the street, a couple was walking on the road when a strange man suddenly rushed out and took out a card to say to the man "There are five million in this card. You give me your girlfriend." "What kind of green onion, don't fucking mess around here, get out of here!" The man took the card and turned around and barked at his girlfriend next to him. NS.

The learning posture of a student is not something that you can learn from other students.

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

It’s been a long time since I saw everyone. I happily say hello to everyone. As a result, a woman who chased my husband said, "Your mouth is so sweet, your husband has diabetes, right?" As a senior rotting girl with three years of connotation, I decisively fucked her. Then your mouth is so poisonous, your boyfriend has uremia!"

When watching a movie and reaching out for popcorn, it is always a little embarrassing to touch the girl's hand in the bucket accidentally. Especially if you two don't know each other, and she doesn't know you are eating her popcorn all the time.

Have you noticed that weather forecast is a sacred existence for parents. Change the channel to the weather forecast, be sure to stop and watch it. When broadcasting the weather forecast, the whole family must be silent, quiet as a chicken, and listen carefully. At this time, you must hold back everything you say, even if what you want to say is: it's on fire! I have to finish the broadcast. Why on earth, you don't plant the land, and don't go out the next day!

, brother, don’t worry, it’s convenient, what's the matter, we carry

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

suddenly hand a friend a heavy object, if he says, "That’s a good thing!" A northerner, if he says "Ah so heavy!" he is a southerner. Hit your friend hard on the head. If he says "It hurts!" then it is a northerner. If he says "It hurts!" it is a southerner. Of course, the dialects are ever-changing and may not be accurate. The main pleasure of this incident is to suddenly hand a heavy object to a friend and hit him hard on the head.

The package sent from abroad was sent to the nearby post office without any movement for 5 days. I called post and said that my package needs to be picked up with an ID card. But the recipient name I filled in above is Monkey King. So I have to issue a certificate at the property management of the community to prove that I am the Monkey King, and then go to the post office to get the package. Am I going to perform a seventy-two change first? Waiting online, a bit anxious!


"ten years later,The million-dollar man appeared in front of me in a luxury car, as always, softly said to me: "Do you still love me?" I answered without any hesitation: "Love." He said excitedly: "Follow me Let's go, I can finally give you a rich life." I smiled and said to him: "I'm sorry, I can't go with you, my husband and children are waiting for me to go home to cook."

girlfriend learns to drive

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

The first day of college reported that my mother accompanied me to pay the tuition, check in, and apply for the meal card. I didn’t say a word all the way until I lined up to fill out the form. When the pen fell to the ground, I bent over to pick it up, and my mother kicked me down! Before I figured out what was going on, my mother said seriously: "This kick hurts you! I want you to remember! I can't be with you every day. Next time I bend over, remember Cover your chest with your hand..."

I am 16 years old this year, and I discovered that I have a special ability, which I just discovered. Today, I rub a certain part of the body with my hand. After rubbing for about three to five minutes, transparent water will suddenly flow from that part. Slimy, it scared me a lot, absolutely not deceiving, I tried it a few times yesterday and it was basically the same. The specific purpose of this liquid is not yet known. But I have signed up to participate in the World Desert Survival Competition. I think my super ability can definitely win the first place in the singles. I plan to win a team championship. Will anyone go with it?

Tsundere's chili oil, a mudslide in the non-staple food area

Ten years ago, he left without saying goodbye and left me a text message

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