Fan Sharon confided her troubles to me, and she said:
"
Teacher, I was almost confused by that man, I really didn't know what to do?
At the beginning of the year, I met my true destiny at a blind date, and he also kept in touch with me with the mentality of getting in touch with each other.
But since July, his attitude towards me has changed. He responded to messages faster than before, and disappeared at any time.
At first I thought he didn't want to contact me, but in early August, he could chat with me until midnight. His cold and hot attitude made me particularly confused.
We have no progress at all, and I really can't guess the man's thoughts, so I came to you and hope you can help me. "
What does the other party say after a blind date?
01
You didn’t talk deeply.
When you chat with the shallow information such as movies, hobbies, zodiac signs, and reading, you did not further improve your chat level, resulting in your understanding of each other in a relatively shallow way.
02
The other party has better objects.
The other party has never stopped his circulating gaze. When he meets a better partner, he will lean his energy towards that person. If their progress is not very fast, or their relationship encounters setbacks, the man will think of you again.
No matter what the reason is, as long as you want to be with the other party, your chat skills should be further improved. Because value improvement is a long-term job, you may need to put in a lot of effort, but you can learn to satisfy the other person's emotions in chat immediately.
In the case of
, Sharon's blind date partner came back to find Sharon after he ignored Sharon for a while. This shows that Sharon is still attractive to men. As long as she can seize this opportunity in time, she will definitely be able to "chat" the men home.
Here I will teach you a few chat skills that Sharon has used. I hope it can give you some inspiration to those who are listening to the show:
01
Respond to the other party's emotions
For example, a man said to Sharon in the past:
"I'm going to meet a big customer at the end of this month. This person is very picky and a detail control. I'm going to be tortured by him again."
Sharon usually replied: "Then you have worked so hard!"
Next, the man replied: "It's all for life." Then the two of them said nothing. This chat mode between Sharon and men is called "concluding chat". If the other party tells you something, you will immediately make a conclusion.
For example, if the other party says to meet a picky customer, your conclusion is that the other party is working very hard. This conclusion is correct, but this conclusion is nonsense.
Because When there are many emotions in the message you convey to you, you should focus on the other person's emotions, rather than on your conclusion about this matter.
For example, if a man complains to you about the customer being picky, his mood must be negative. At this time, you can choose to comfort the other person's emotions. You can say:
"Then you have worked so hard, I'll squeeze your shoulders." Then you send him a cute emoticon pack. The advantage of the sentence
is that when you have no actual physical contact, you first use words to open the boundaries of physical contact, which will not appear abrupt, and will easily trigger the other party's association.
02
Feedback Chat
Feedback Chat - After the other party talks to you a topic, you must be able to immediately throw a related topic to the other party.
For example, when a man says "work is annoying", in addition to responding to the other person's emotions, we can also use feedback chat to further broaden your chat dimension.
For example, Sharon can ask: "Why do all the people in your group leave?"
When a man's desire to talk is ignited by you, he will definitely complain about more content to you. When the man answers your question, you can continue to feed back the man. You can ask:
"What are you going to do next?"
may ask, but I don't know how to feed back the man's problems? I will tell you a trick here, you can use W+H to ask questions.
W refers to what, which means that you ask the other party with concern what happened?
H means HOW, which means asking you to ask the other party what to do? After using this technique of
, you have to feed back to the other party again after 2 or 3 days. For example, on Monday, the man said to you:
"I'm so annoyed! There are so many people in our group resigned, and now I'm finishing all the work."
So on Wednesday, you have to take the initiative to ask the man:
"How are you doing these two days? Are you still finishing their work? Is the situation getting better?"
At this time, the man will definitely feel that you care about him. Then you just need to express your concerns about him to the other party. For example, you can say:
"I don't want to see you being too tired. What do you think of it? I didn't know how to help you after thinking about it for two days."
Generally speaking, men will feel warm after hearing what you say. In this way, your relationship has advanced again.
