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Don’t just listen to what your children say. You should look at what your children do in detail. If you want to move forward and retreat freely, you need to learn to refuse and leave room for yourself so that you will not be able to retreat.
1. Don’t hand over your few houses to your children
The house is the base for your lifetime, and the house is related to the return of the fallen leaves. Even if you make use of your remaining energy for your children, you need to keep the bottom line. If you own your own house, you will not live a life without a certainty. Only by living in your own house will you feel unparalleled comfort and ease. Some elderly people originally planned to live with their children in the second half of their lives, but things are unpredictable. They may live between two generations, which is far inferior to living in their own homes, because they can reduce family conflicts; unfilial children may not leave you a place in their homes, and they are far inferior to living in their own homes, because they can avoid looking at the faces of unfilial children. Not to mention living in the houses of relatives and friends, if you bite the bullet and ask to live in the houses of relatives and friends, you will either be rejected by relatives and friends, or you will live a life of being dependent on others.
2. Don’t give all the right to choose and decision to your children
Whether it is the right to choose or decision, it is closely related to the right to speak. Only with a certain right to speak can children care about your feelings, solicit your opinions, and you will hope to live the life you want. If you accept your children by obedience, you will do whatever you say. In the long run, your children may lose your attention. I will neither think from the perspective of you nor be intimate with you. As your life becomes harder and harder, my children will even dislike you more and more. Over time, the quality of life and the dignity of life will be much worse than before.
3. Don’t hand over all your savings to your children
After the children learn that you have savings, before you hand over the savings to your children, the filial piety shown by the children is not sure whether it is true love or false, and it is impossible to be sure whether the children are filial to your savings or those who are filial to you. It is best not to test your children's human nature by giving all their savings to them, just because you can't afford to lose. You should know that when you hand over all your savings to your children, you will be extremely smooth. When you try to get all your savings back, or get some of your savings back, you will realize that there are many difficulties. Besides, children have not had the habit of dependent on their parents before, but instead may develop the habit of dependent on their parents; children have had the habit of dependent on their parents before, which will undoubtedly aggravate their children's habit of dependent on their parents.
Conclusion: You need both trust and guard against your children. Although your things will sooner or later become your things, your things are not yours after all. Therefore, don’t worry about giving your things to your children. This will not only cultivate your children’s patience, but also reserve a way out just in case.
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