text | Working hard and persevering
Hollywood The famous movie star Marilyn Monroe once starred in a movie " The Seven-Year Itch". The film tells the story of the crisis faced by a marriage reaching its peak in the 7th year after marriage. The key to the occurrence of the "seven-year itch" is that people have a boredom mentality. If they stay in the same environment for a long time, they will inevitably feel bored and bored, which will lead to other ideas.
In the third year after marriage, I really felt this "itching" feeling. From this point of view, our marriage has already experienced a crisis, and the "seven-year itch" has arrived early and turned into a "three-year itch." I can tell that my husband must have fallen into the "three-year itch" that came early.
At this time, he can be described as follows: he spent almost all his time on work. When I go out, I think about work, and when I get home, I still think about work. When I get home, I lie down on the sofa and don’t even bother to talk. Due to too little time together and lack of effective communication, he and I were often in a state of "having nothing to say".
Think about it: when you are in love, you have endless things to talk about all day long, but when you get married, you suddenly have nothing to talk about, and you don’t know what went wrong. I feel that getting married is really boring now. Although we live together after getting married, we can’t exchange a few words. We are like strangers when we come in and out. I don’t feel it anymore. Maybe this is the “aesthetic fatigue” of marriage.
I know this is very dangerous, and I always try to find ways to recover everything I have lost, but I never manage it well. At this time, because of work, my husband and I were living in two places. As if I was sick, I went to the doctor and thought that there was an opportunity to solve the marital crisis. Later facts proved that my idea was quite naive. The "cure" of separation in two places not only failed to cure the chronic diseases in our marriage, but on the contrary, it became the biggest killer leading to our divorce.
When I graduated from college, many of my classmates stayed in Shanghai, and few like Zhang Ziliang and I returned to our places of origin to “develop”. It is the wish of both of our parents to return to our place of origin. After all, they both hold relatively important positions in government departments. It is not a big problem for them to arrange good jobs for their children.
Facts have proved that we took the right step at the beginning. While the classmates who stayed in Shanghai were running around all day to find a suitable job, we were already very comfortable in the government agencies. After rain, he became a "civil servant" that many people envied.
Recently, Zhang Ziliang’s unit set up an office in Shanghai, and his superiors assigned him to be the director of this office. This is a good job. If nothing else happens, after staying there for two years and returning to Hangzhou, the superiors will definitely entrust me with important tasks. Of course Zhang Ziliang didn't want to lose this opportunity, so he quickly went to Shanghai to check in.
Although Shanghai is not far from Hangzhou, because the newly established office is in the preparatory stage, his work seems busier than before, so he rarely has the opportunity to go back to Hangzhou. Even if I come back once in a while, I come and go in a hurry. I can't stay at home for half a day and have to rush back to Shanghai.
This started the life of me and him living apart in two places. The days of separation did not bring us the pain we imagined. On the contrary, in the first days of separation, we all had the fresh feeling of going for an outing in the suburbs. I even concluded that by living apart for a period of time at a certain stage of married life, we might be able to avoid a marital crisis.
On days when my husband is not at home, our living room is the cleanest place. I had few friends and never brought guests home. I am a person who makes a clear distinction between work and life. I don’t have much contact with my colleagues outside of work, so my living room is the most unused place. I seemed to be back to my girlhood all of a sudden, sitting quietly by myself, reading and listening to music, leisurely and contentedly.
However, after being separated from my husband for a long time, I realized that women who have experienced men are indispensable for them. But I don't want to admit this in front of my husband, because he doesn't seem to have the same desire as me.This is just my guess, and it’s just a guess. In fact, I don’t know what my husband thinks, but I feel it from his calm and unruffled tone when he occasionally calls me from Shanghai. A little clue. I trust my feelings, although there is no further evidence to support this so far.
The current situation of my marriage being separated in two places has brought obvious changes to me. In those lonely days, I felt that the second estrus in my life had arrived. Lying under the dark night, those sleepless days made me think of men more and more unbelievably and blatantly. What made me ashamed was that , this man is not the husband.
This feeling makes me extremely excited, so insomnia is inevitable. The books in the bookcase didn't interest me at all. I suddenly got up and dug through the TV cabinet, but after struggling for a long time, I realized what a pure man my husband turned out to be. I couldn't find even a single sex film in the house. , I had no choice but to go back to bed disappointed.
In the midst of boredom, the next round of whims begins. This is undoubtedly an aimless journey, but it can make the nihilistic life more realistic or believable.
Just enjoying the torment of desire, one day I finally couldn't resist the temptation, and absurdly, under the cover of night, I went to the panic-looking vendors on the roadside and bought a lot of SEX DVDs. This kind of adult video is really exciting. This is my first time to watch it. The sex scenes on the screen were so passionate that I was dumbfounded and my heart was tingling.
Maybe it’s due to the influence of adult videos, but I couldn’t fall asleep while lying on the bed. All my thoughts were filled with scenes of men having sex with women. I am a healthy woman, and I also long for more passion in life, but marriage cannot give me this. Perhaps, I can find what I fantasize about somewhere else, but the nature of a lady determines that I cannot do it.
I began to reflect on whether I had really imprisoned myself too much. Can I break free? Could that kind of "debauched" life be suitable for me?
According to Freud , sex is the most primitive driving force of human beings. We used to be relatively repressed about sex, but now we are open to it. Conditions have changed, our concepts have changed, and our sexual desire has burst out despite the long-term oppression. The satisfaction of sexual life has become an important part of the quality of life. People who cannot get sexual satisfaction in marriage will look for extramarital affairs, and the number of men and women seeking extramarital sexual stimulation has increased greatly.
The general process of women's extramarital affairs is "dislike the old and prefer the new" and "abandon the old in favor of the new", but rarely "like the new but never get tired of the old". They are often braver and more persistent than men in the pursuit of extramarital happiness. It is often difficult for women to separate sex and emotion. Unlike men, they can have fun without love and obtain sexual pleasure without love. They are only willing to give sex when their emotional needs are met and achieve the fusion of temperament. , the unity of spirit and body.
Knowing Zhu Xiaowei has gone through such a process.
Speaking of which, our acquaintance was extremely accidental. Once I called a friend and accidentally dialed the wrong number. When I called, I heard a man say to me, Meiling, where did you call from? How come I never called her? Have you seen this number? I was about to call you when you called me. I said, what gift are you going to give our mother for her birthday?
I quickly interrupted him and told him that I was not Meiling. I just dialed the wrong number and I was really sorry. He smiled and said, Sister, what tricks are you playing with me? Can I still hear your voice? Let me tell you something serious. Please tell me what gift to buy. Tomorrow is my mother’s birthday. I have to buy it quickly, otherwise it will be too late.
It seems that he really regards me as his sister. I didn't believe there were such coincidences in the world. Driven by curiosity, I boldly said to him, "It seems that we are quite destined, but I am indeed not your old man's sister. I am someone you have never seen before." woman.Hey, does my voice really sound like your sister?
He seemed to sense that something was wrong, and quickly apologized to me, and repeatedly stated that my voice was indeed very similar to his sister's. I became more curious and said to him a little unreasonably, then ask your sister to call me. I want to see if you lied to me. He said okay, okay, hung up the phone, and sure enough, the phone rang a few minutes later.
I picked up the phone and heard a girl's voice: "Hello, hello, I am Zhu Xiaowei's sister Liao Xiaohong. My brother asked me to call you to say hello, but he didn't tell me who you are. Hehe "You are not my future sister-in-law, are you?"
This girl's voice is really similar to mine. It seems that the one named Zhu Xiaowei didn't lie to me. Later, we chatted for a few more words before she hung up the phone. As soon as he hung up the phone, Zhu Xiaowei's call came in. He said eagerly, you have been chatting for so long. I keep calling you but the line is always busy. Now believe me I'm not lying to you. Do your voices sound similar?
I said, it looks like it. However, your sister almost thought that I was your girlfriend. Let me tell you, I am a married woman, so don’t take any chances with me!
When he saw that I was joking with him, he also laughed on the phone and said, "How dare you? Since your voice is so similar to my sister, your personality must be similar to hers." My sister is a powerful girl. If I try to trick you and you act like a young girl on my sister, I won’t be able to bear the consequences!
His tongue-twisting words made me very happy: You are wrong, I am not strong at all. If you saw me, you would know that I am very gentle!
That’s how we met. I think our acquaintance process is quite interesting. Although we haven't met each other yet, from his magnetic voice on the phone, I guess he must be good-looking and a man who pleases girls in life.
Since then, I will still think of this incident from time to time. Every time I think of it, I can't help but smile. One day, I was in a good mood, so I called his number again. He answered the phone and said, Hello, I didn't expect you to still remember me!
I said, why didn’t you treat me as your sister this time? He said, there is caller ID, I guessed it was you when I saw the number. How are you doing, how are you doing recently? If you have anything happy to tell me, let me be happy with you too!
We happened to have nothing to do that day, so we chatted without a word. He told me that he was 30 years old, had just returned from studying in the United States, and was now running a joint venture. He told some things about his time studying in the United States, and I also told him some things about my study in Shanghai.
After hanging up the phone, I looked at the time and realized that we had been chatting for more than two hours without knowing it. A few days later, we spoke on the phone again, this time from him. Now I can’t remember what we talked about at the beginning. I just remember that when I was about to hang up the phone, he suddenly asked me: You have been married for so many years, does your husband still love you?
I didn’t answer him. Seeing that he touched on my pain points, he apologized to me. I said emotionally, it doesn't matter!
When I put down the phone, I felt even more depressed. I thought that I haven’t heard from my husband for a long time, and I don’t know what he is busy with now. Could it be that he has already forgotten his wife in Hangzhou? On impulse, I dialed my husband's cell phone and asked him excitedly: Tell me the truth, do you still love me now?
He hesitated on the other end of the phone and said impatiently, "What's wrong with you? Nothing happened, right?" I'm busy right now. If anything happens, let's talk about it when we get home, okay? Okay, if nothing happens, I'll hang up!
He actually hung up the phone. I held the microphone and sat there stupidly, not knowing what to do. After I woke up, I looked at the clock on the wall. It was already 8 o'clock in the evening, but I hadn't eaten dinner yet. Only then did I feel very hungry, so I went downstairs to eat a bowl of noodles at the night market outside.
On the way back, I saw a handsome man whistling and walking towards me. I couldn’t help but think, maybe this man is Zhu Xiaowei! I felt funny at my random thoughts and couldn't help but smile a little to myself.
After three months of talking on the phone with Zhu Xiaowei, I finally decided to meet him. I plucked up the courage to ask him to meet, and he agreed after thinking about it. After meeting him, I discovered that Zhu Xiaowei was much more handsome than I thought. This made me very excited and felt that my judgment was correct.
We sat in the cafe for a while, and then went to a nearby park. It was summer at this time, and the park was full of people enjoying the cool air. We were walking and chatting along the small lake in the park, and unknowingly came to a small forest. There are relatively few people here, and you can only vaguely see couples hugging each other and making out in the depths of the forest.
I approached Zhu Xiaowei impulsively and whispered, can you give me a hug? I saw his shoulders shake, obviously he didn't expect me to be so bold. In fact, I regretted it as soon as I said it. I felt that as a woman, I shouldn't take such initiative. We have just met once, but I made such a request. Am I being too indulgent?
I was thinking about it when suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder, like an electric current, which made me shiver. I couldn't control myself anymore, so I threw myself into his arms and hugged him tightly. Soon we were leaning against a tree and kissing wildly.
After the passion subsided, we strolled in the park for a while. Seeing that it was getting late, Zhu Xiaowei offered to take me home. He was driving and I was sitting in the passenger seat. He stretched out a hand and gently held mine. If there are not many cars in front, he will turn his face and smile at me, and I will smile at him tenderly.
The way home is so short, we will arrive soon. He parked his car downstairs and said he would not go upstairs since he had something to do tomorrow. I said coquettishly, just go up and sit for a while, okay? He hesitated for a moment, then followed me upstairs. As soon as the door opened, neither of us could control ourselves. After closing the door, we hugged each other and kissed wildly.
He put his hand into my skirt while kissing me and touched my most sensitive part. I couldn't help but collapse in his arms and moan happily. When I woke up a little, I pointed at the bedroom door and motioned for him to carry me into the bedroom. So he held me and walked slowly to the bedroom, taking off my clothes impatiently as he walked. When I walked to the bedroom door, he had almost stripped me of all my clothes.
The bedroom door was not closed tightly. I stretched out a hand in his arms and pushed it gently, and it opened with a "squeak". I hooked my arms around his neck and stared into his eyes shyly, imagining the life-and-death passion that was about to unfold on the bed.
But he stopped just after taking a few steps. I asked him why he stopped with my eyes in confusion, but I saw his eyes wide open with an expression of shock. I followed his gaze and suddenly saw someone lying on my bed.
That person is Zhang Ziliang—my husband!
Follow me, work hard to persevere, read selected novels and stories, and be in a good mood every day
Follow-up updates...
