I have wine and tea. If you have stories, come to me. Click "Follow" above and you will be mine. Zhang Ailing's "Half Life": "Emotions are very difficult to deal with. You can't just put them in the refrigerator and think that they can be kept for a certain period of time without

I have wine and tea. If you have stories, come to me.

Click "Follow" above and you will be mine.

Zhang Ailing " Half a Lifetime ": " Feelings are difficult to deal with. You can't just put them in the refrigerator and think that they can be stored for a certain period of time without deteriorating. "

are already living together. Couples who have been in a good relationship for most of their lives can say that the shelf life of their relationship is permanent because they have proven this fact.

And if a relationship has just begun and both parties are still young, the shelf life of the relationship is unknown. It may not go bad forever, or it may go bad after a while.

Variables exist in every relationship, because relationships are relationships formed by people. People's hearts are changeable, and so are feelings. It can even be said that everyone's feelings have an element of gambling. Winning is good, but losing is just one of the consequences..

The principle is very simple, but the implementation is not simple, because there is a weakness in human nature: we can think of many principles, but we do not implement them. If a person is trapped by love but cannot overcome the psychological barriers, he is destined to be accompanied by pain.

Letters from readers:

People only understand in middle age that emotional affairs are full of variables and anything can happen. We can have good wishes, and we can believe that there will be no problems with our feelings, but after all, these are just wishes, not reality.

Take me for example. I once firmly believed that I had met true love. I firmly believed that my husband and I would grow old together. I firmly believed that there would be no problems in our marriage. But what was the result? Not only was there something wrong with him, there was also a big problem with the marriage itself.

He fell in love with someone else during my confinement period, which of course was not what I expected to happen. But it happens, what can I do? I can strictly demand that I don't make mistakes, and I can also strictly demand that he doesn't make mistakes, but he doesn't listen to me. I really have no choice but to feel helpless.

I couldn't solve our marriage problems by myself, so I had to ask my mother-in-law for help, but my mother-in-law said: " You are busy confinement, and there is nothing wrong with my son loving others! The problem you mentioned is not a problem at all. When you reach my age You know, all men are the same as him, because they are men and their nature can never be changed! ”

Her words made me feel suffocated, a feeling of despair rushed towards me, and there seemed to be a voice echoing in my ears: "It's over! Your marriage is completely over! It's hopeless! Get a divorce as soon as possible!"

I said that I really wanted to slap her twice, but she took the initiative and slapped me twice.

I want to thank her, because she woke me up, and those two slaps made me determined to get a divorce, because I no longer have the need to be nostalgic and have nothing to worry about.

It is not difficult to decide to divorce. What is difficult is who the children will be with. I thought that as long as I insisted on having the child, I could take the child away, but the truth is it's not that simple. Think about it, my mother-in-law and my husband don't know right from wrong, they are always tough-talking, and they keep making excuses when they make mistakes. It is impossible for them to admit their mistakes and then let me take away the child.

In the end, I had no choice but to sue. This long process made me very painful. There were several times when I almost gave up and wanted to avoid divorce for the sake of my children. However, reason tells me that I cannot do this, otherwise it will not only be detrimental to me, but it will also be detrimental to the child to grow up in such an environment.

Fortunately, justice was on my side and the result was as I wished. Even so, I still paid a heavy price for "marrying the wrong person". But there is no way, after all, I can't predict the future. If I had known that this would be the outcome, I would definitely not marry .

Donglin Xiting Emotional suggestions:

Many people like to say this sentence: "If you don't succeed, you will succeed."

However, when dealing with specific problems, many people are unable to implement that sentence into life. To put it bluntly, they just want to succeed and do not want to fail. Once they fail, they will struggle..

That woman once had the same problem. Regarding this issue, her initial good expectations for marriage were that she only wanted to succeed and did not want to fail, and she did not even think about the possibility of failure. But the problem was that things like feelings were not static. You can control yourself but you can't control your husband.

Even if you can take precautions on this kind of problem, there are still variables in other problems, which can be summed up in one sentence: when you fail, can you do it? If you are willing to gamble and accept defeat, you can be free and free, and you can no longer be obsessed with why you lose, but to create a new life based on accepting the reality. Unable to change the bad status quo, all that is left for you is pain and helplessness

The above problems are the normal state of relationships. If you cannot accept these normal conditions, if you do not have the courage to face these normal conditions, you'd better stay single; if If you don't want to be single, you must build your psychology so that when variables arise, you can be willing to admit defeat and not give yourself the chance to be trapped by love.

In addition, in terms of the woman's marriage, remember: marriage. Among them, the stupidest behavior is to be stubborn and quibble after making a mistake. You must know how to use this standard to hold yourself, your significant other, and other people related to your marriage, such as your mother-in-law. Only when you decide who is wrong and who is right can you decide where to go .