I saw a foreign documentary, which talked about some elderly people without families. Even if they died in their rooms, no one would know about it until the stench wafted out of the rooms.
Will a situation like this appear around us? In fact, this kind of situation has always happened in life, but the frequency is not high, and there are very few around us, so we don’t know about it.
When people get old, the greatest sorrow is not having little money or a small house, but having no one to rely on and no one to accompany them, and they grow old helplessly in the disaster of old age. I applied for that sentence: Whose old age is not a bloody baptism.
In old age, what is the most difficult thing for women who live alone without their children around them? The 78-year-old Grandma Zhao in the community said frankly: During the day, you can chat with the sisters downstairs and bask in the sun. The most difficult thing about is the loneliness at night and the loneliness of having no one to complain about. This is not because you have something to do. It can kill the desolation from the heart, all because of the feeling that life has little meaning.
Confidant: 78-year-old Grandma Zhao
I am 78 years old this year and have been retired for many years. My wife has left me for more than ten years. My two children have already married, and my eldest grandson also got married last year.
Throughout my life, I feel like I have been busy with my children, my wife, and my parents. After finally waiting for my wife to retire, my parents to pass away, my children to have a family, and their grandchildren to be raised, it was time to enjoy old age, but my wife's illness separated us from each other.
I first started farming in the countryside, and I am a true country woman. Just because my wife works in the city, by chance, my wife brought the three of us, mother and son, to live with him in the city.
In the early years, I followed others to do small jobs to earn some living expenses. Later, after the reform and opening up, I learned to run a small business on my own, wholesale small things, pushing a tricycle, and going to markets everywhere to sell goods.
By chance, I became a family worker in my wife’s factory, doing logistics and cleaning work. In this way, when I reach the age of 50, I will retire and have a pension of several hundred dollars.
Although my life is very difficult, I also feel that I am very lucky to have met a wife who treats me sincerely. There are sisters in our village who are in a similar situation to me. Several of them are divorced. My wife took me to the city and I am considered a happy person.
To be honest, women of our era were really happy to meet a man like my husband. Because of this, I treat my wife and my wife's family wholeheartedly.
In their old age, we took our parents-in-law close to us to support them in their old age. Whether they were brothers-in-law or eldest aunts, as long as they told us about their difficulties, we would lend a helping hand.
My wife is also very grateful to me. I always say that when he retires and stops working at all, he will accompany me to enjoy life. Because since I came to the city, I haven't really spent a day living for myself.
Because my wife has skills, she really retired from her job when she was 65 years old. However, an illness made me a daughter living alone. My children are afraid that I cannot accept it and insist that I live with them.
I understand that my two children want to be filial to me, but I cannot disturb my children’s lives just because I am in a bad mood. I stayed with my children for half a month each and then returned to my own home. I thought that I would still need to live by myself in the future.
Before, my main tasks were to take care of my children and do housework. After my wife left, I began to pay attention to physical exercise. I would exercise with the older ladies I met in the community every day, including boxing, walking, and doing health exercises.
After my wife passed away, many people told me that you should take good control of your savings, don't give them all to your children easily, and leave some pension money for yourself. But I still think that a little money is enough for . Anyway, the pension is rising every year, and I can’t spend it all. Exercise is the best savings.
Therefore, when it comes to my grandchildren’s education, study, and work, I will express my feelings to some extent. I will also help my children buy a house and a car. Although it's not much, I don't want to hang on to money, so just keep these.
I have always believed that for serious illnesses, especially serious illnesses, just accept your fate and treat minor illnesses with medical treatment. Don't think too much. A woman living alone can live her own life and be more open-minded.
Every time I see reports of elderly people living alone who passed away and were not discovered until after a long period of time, I think this is normal. Between our parents and their children, not all old people have filial children, and not every child treats their parents sincerely. There is still fate between people, and parents and children also have interests in each other, so don't blame the children, everything is God's will.
What is the most difficult thing for women living alone in their later years? It’s not the lack of money or the small housing, but the frightening loneliness of being alone at home when night comes. There are very few people who don’t think wildly. Most people our age do it.
Although I also have my own hobbies and a group of good sisters, no matter how lively they are during the day, as long as a person walks into the house, the silence in the room will make me feel a little uncomfortable.
If you are not feeling well and don't want your children to worry, you will generally not take the initiative to tell your children that you are not feeling well. Take some medicine if you can, or go to the hospital yourself, unless it is a last resort. , will call their children.
Whenever I feel uncomfortable, I miss the days when my wife was alive, think of the good times we had, and miss the good wishes my wife told me. This is the most difficult time for me. The moments when I miss my wife, my heart The saddest.
I am already this age, and it is unrealistic to find a wife. But people all have feelings and need companionship. It is unrealistic to follow your children all day long, because they also have their own days. Therefore, many times, our elder sister When we are together, we always wonder if we sisters can live together and live together.
Some people have done this, but they were still crushed by the reality of . Everyone's habits and life values are different, and it is impossible to tolerate changes. Therefore, it is better to live alone. But the loneliness at night is the most terrifying thing, but it is also a helpless thing. I can only wait for death to come and try to live a good life every day.
I have also thought about it, if I really reach the point where I can no longer take care of myself, I hope that I can leave this world happily, neither let me live without dignity, nor let my children pay for my illness. Life is not easy, let’s get through it. It's just that, morning and night are going through hardships, living in pain for a few more years, spending all your life savings, I don't think it's worth it.
People can enjoy life with peace of mind in their old age, and the most unbearable loneliness is also a life experience. Occasionally thinking about it, I always feel: a person's life is really just that, he only comes to this world to pay off his debts, and then just leave. He neither suffers any sin nor is a burden to his children. This is the blessing of the old man and his children.
Conclusion:
Throughout life, everyone’s old age is a disaster, and no one can escape. Only by settling one’s mind can one truly enjoy life in a down-to-earth manner. But in old age, living alone is indeed lonely. An old man who can truly enjoy loneliness is also an old man with an extremely strong heart.
The most difficult thing for a woman living alone in her later years is the loneliness at night and the desolation in her heart. Therefore, when conditions permit, I still encourage single elderly people to partner up with each other. This can not only help each other's lonely hearts have someone to rely on, but also allow their children to go about life with peace of mind.
Author: Huagui Zenxin
Pay attention to my words and enter your soul. You have stories, I have tea, and we can chat for the rest of our lives together.
The pictures in the article come from the Internet.
