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Text: Shili
Illustrations: From the Internet
"I am 32 years old. I have been single until now because I have never met a suitable partner. Now I am particularly anxious because not only my parents are urging me to get married, but there are also rumors around me. For this reason and My parents had a lot of quarrels.
My parents introduced me to a man with good conditions. They said that after 30 years of age, there is no need to choose women. As long as they have money, it will be the same no matter who they marry, just like them. Same. Now I don’t know if I should listen to my parents and just find someone to marry.” A reader friend sent me this private message two days ago.
After reading this private letter, the author thought for a long time.
For a woman over 30 years old, is it really the same no matter who she marries?
The answer must be no, because marriage is a lifelong event. If you choose the wrong person, you are destined to regret it for the rest of your life.
Actually, it makes a big difference as to who you marry.
The reason why people of my parents' generation married the same no matter who they were was because they were different at that time. At that time, the parents' orders and the matchmaker's words were the same.
At that time, no one had a choice. Even if the marriage partner was unsatisfactory, they would continue because the price and cost of divorce were too high. In addition, compared to those who could not get married, being able to get married was already good.
Now is the era of free marriage. Everyone has a choice and can choose the person they love. If you listen to your parents' opinions and settle for a marriage, then there is a high probability that you will regret it in the future.
You may even blame your parents for your mistakes, causing misfortune to the family.
When you reach a certain age, the words "get married" and "find a partner" are basically the topics of relatives' chats. Parents urge you at home, and relatives urge you when you go out during holidays. No young person of the right age can escape the nightmare of being urged to get married.
You don't have to worry about this at all, because your mouth is on other people's bodies, and you can't control what others say.
The most correct decision is only by firming up your beliefs.
For women, when it comes to marriage, wait and see. There is no need to rush.
You must not be anxious about getting married. The more anxious you are, the more problems will arise.
Sociologist Andrew Cherlin said: "Don't rush to get married, because 80% of marriage crises begin with blindness in choice. Marrying later is more conducive to marriage."
Women must think carefully before getting married. These.
Before getting married, you must think about why you want to get married.
In this increasingly impetuous society, some people get married because of money, some get married because of appearance, some get married because of the urging of their parents, and some get married for the sake of children.
For women, why they enter marriage must be the top priority.
Be sure to choose what you need, otherwise you will definitely regret it in the future.
Love is different from marriage, you must consider reality.
The former is romantic, poetic and distant.
But the latter is the reality of daily necessities, only the immediate contentment.
Love is about liking, marriage is about suitability.
Marriage is not playing house. If you don’t think about it before marriage, you will definitely be nothing after marriage.
Marriage requires too much rationality, because reality is cruel.
If two people want to stay together for a long time, they must consider many practical things.
car, house, money, both parties’ families, food, supplies, and drinks.
Only when both sides are strong enough, matched, and evenly matched.
Only this relationship can be maintained for a long time.
After all, love must be implemented in real life.
For women, considering material conditions before getting married is not just about reality, but about being responsible for their own future.
In this regard, women must not speak.
Because the basis of marriage is firstly an economic behavior, secondly social behavior, and finally emotional factors. Although saying this may make people feel too materialistic, it is indeed the reality.
Feelings are the bridge to marriage. When you are in love, you can ignore other factors and focus on feelings. Marriage is another stage in the development of the relationship between the sexes, another journey, and reality must be the most important thing.
Live your life first and make yourself better.
Let’s talk about marriage when we have the ability to withstand unknown risks in the future.
In addition, women cannot blindly marry, they must look at each other's family.
Love is a matter of two people, while marriage is related to at least three families.
A true match is the key to a happy marriage.
This not only refers to economic strength, but also spiritual values. It is difficult for families who are too far apart to reconcile, especially ideological conflicts, which are the most fatal.
The best way to understand your partner is to see the other person’s parents’ personality and relationship style.
The way the other person’s family gets along can tell how you two will get along in the future, and family upbringing is very important!
Because of a native family, a person will be changed subtly.
Just like: "Dragon begets dragon, phoenix begets phoenix, the son of mouse can make holes".
If the two parties really have different views, it will be difficult to be happy in life.
Just like that sentence: "The loneliest thing in the world is not to die alone, but to accompany someone to die alone."
Finally, before a woman gets married, she must consider the other person's character and sense of responsibility.
A man with poor character cannot marry even if he is good in other aspects, because a man with poor character can never give a woman happiness.
Just like a man who is not filial to his parents, it is naturally impossible for him to know gratitude and love.
Women should consider whether the person you marry can bear the responsibilities of marriage and whether he is well prepared for your future.
If the other party is not ready, he cannot enter into marriage, because such a marriage is child's play and cannot withstand any risks.
A man who is truly worth trusting for life will not only give you verbal promises, but will also use practical actions to make you feel at ease.
When a woman meets such a man, she must cherish it, because this miss may last a lifetime.
Love is romance, we spend time together under the moonlight; marriage is about living together day and night.
If a woman wants to be truly happy for the rest of her life, she should not rush into marriage. Wait and marry the right person.
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Today’s topic: “Do you think it’s right?”
