What should I do if my love is broken? Most friends will roughly say that they broke up or divorced each other. For this answer, I can only say "You don't understand human nature at all."
In real life, not everyone will choose to break up or divorce when they are broken by their lover, because many people will think about whether they can bear the consequences of breaking up or divorce in multiple dimensions such as ability, needs, and emotion.
In the few years I was an emotional mentor, I met a female friend who was domestically abused. I agree with most of my friends, that is, divorcing her man, how about her? He kept saying that after the divorce, he was unable to live better.
Regarding the reason why she didn't want to get divorced, I asked a question: "Since you don't get a divorce, what use is it for you to find me?" She said that she wanted to retaliate against him and wanted him to regret everything she did.
At that time, I thought about it, and said one sentence: "Since you don't want to divorce, then you must live better than the other person. This is the best revenge for the other person."
Why do you say that?
Lives better than the other person and can change who he is now
Is a man who can't make money, really incompetent? Can a woman who has been tortured by firewood, rice, oil and salt really unable to restore her beauty? Incompetence and beauty and ugliness cannot be truly defined, because as long as a person does not die, he has the opportunity to change himself.
A man is heartbroken by his lover. As long as he turns his sorrow and pain into motivation to move forward, he can gain more powerful abilities in his efforts, earn more money than now, and leave women speechless. .
A woman is heartbroken by the person she loves. As long as she lives with less fuel and oil, and works harder on her figure and appearance, she can restore her former beauty and make men tempted again.
A series of insulting words such as incompetence, too ugly, lack of self, weakness, inferiority complex, etc., do not exist in people with strong hearts, and there are no people with strong capabilities. So, as long as you live better than the other person,You can change your image in the other's heart from negative to positive, and make the other person regret everything they have done to you.
Lives better than the other party and can develop unknown potentials
Why does your loved one hurt yourself? It is not loving, it is prejudiced against you, it is that you are weak and not strong than yourself.
There is a "Zhou Hari window effect" in psychology, which is that people have windows on four sides, and one of the windows hides me, that is, people have unexploited potential power.
In other words, the self that we show in front of our lover is not the true self, but the most perfect and comfortable image we think. Therefore, as long as we can develop the unknown potential , You can change your lover's view of yourself. How to develop
? Learning, exercising, communicating with outstanding people, etc., all help us understand ourselves more comprehensively and understand the current society. As we continue to understand ourselves in depth, our potential will naturally be stimulated and become The most perfect person in the lover's heart.
Live better than the other person and take responsibility for his own life
Many people who are heartbroken by their lovers always like to say one thing, that is, "I gave everything for the person I love I gave everything for my family, but in the end I got nothing."
I can understand the pain in this sentence, because I have paid too much and did not get the return it deserved, but I don’t agree with this sentence. The reason why I say this is because your life is yours, not you Lover, not your family.
We always think that we are living for others, but we are actually caught in an illusion of perception. We are actually living for ourselves, but the way some people live for ourselves is "Give everything for the one you love."
If you want to retaliate against those who have broken our hearts, you must change this way and live for yourself, not for anyone.By doing this, you can not only make your life better, but also make yourself no longer dependent on the gift of your lover, become independent and self-conscious, and no longer feel the pain that your lover imposes on you.
Wolong's summary:
Friends who are heartbroken by their lover, want to avenge their lover, and want to make the other person regret it. First of all, you must have enough strength to crush each other, and secondly, you must be better than the other Charismatic, confident, and finally you have to become the goddess and goddess of the other person. And the way to do these three steps is what I said in my appeal "to live better than the other party."
"Living better than the other party" will continuously strengthen one's own abilities, increase one's own charm, and increase one's external and internal attractiveness to the opposite sex. When these elements continue to increase, You will become the most anticipated person.
To hurt your lover, in the process of increasing your attractiveness to yourself, you will become more embarrassed, and will realize that you are not worthy of you, so she or he will be afraid of your leaving . When you are afraid of leaving, your lover who hurts you will become gentle and considerate, hoping to get more love from you.
At this time, you have to show indifference, you have to show that you don’t care, let the other party regret what they did to you before, let the other party realize how "asshole" their previous behavior is, and make the other party Fall into the pain of self-torture.
Revenge for hurting your lover is never a verbal humiliation. It is not caring about hurting your lover after you become good. Therefore, to live better than the other party is the best way to retaliate.
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