Have you ever felt that you were troubled by many things in your past life and were not happy, but you also felt that you could not be called "real trauma", so you dare not or know how to ask for help? Do you, although you may not have experienced extreme events such as wars, natural disasters, terrorist events, etc., still feel that the whole world is full of dangers, cannot relax for a long time, dare not get close to others, and dare not spontaneously live outside the plan and follow your creativity?
If you have ever felt the above, maybe you are being troubled by complex PTSD . Research has found that traumatic events not only include sudden and severe irritating events (such as natural disasters , terrorist attacks), but can also be long-term, subtle, and daily, affecting our lives in an undetectable way. From the video posted by The School of Life on Youtube, lists 12 main symptoms of complex PTSD and some tips from it.
Don't think that only those survivors of earthquakes, air crashes, or horror events deserve to be treated tenderly and sympathetically. If you have a hard time, no matter what you have experienced, you deserve to be deeply and gentlely loved.
PTSD means Posttraumatic stress disorder . It was officially recognized by the government in 1980 and was used to describe a series of traumatic reactions left over from short but devastating events. These events usually include war, rape, accident or terrorist incidents.
and complex PTSD was officially recognized in 1994 to describe a series of traumatic reactions left by after experiencing an equally devastating but longer-lasting event . These events usually occur in the first 15 years of life and can include emotional negligence, humiliation, bullying, disturbed dependence, violence and anger.
Many of us (probably up to 20%) are suffering from complex PTSD, but have never been diagnosed with . We know we are not doing well, but we don't know what terms can describe our problem. We don’t know how to connect our minor problems, we don’t know who to ask for help, and we don’t know what treatment can help.
Complex PTSD 12 Symptoms of Complex PTSD
Here are 12 main symptoms of Complex PTSD. We can consider whether we have some of these symptoms. If there are more than 7, we may need to pay attention.
1. We feel that nothing is safe
No matter where we are, there is a worry that bad things are going to happen . We are always in a state of over-alert.
The disasters we fear are often related to losing decency, such as being suddenly kidnapped and humiliated from the current environment, and perhaps being imprisoned in prison, and then our lives will never have anything to do with any kind and beautiful things. We may not be killed, but our lives are basically over.
Someone may try to use reason to reassure us, saying that reality will not become that bad. But rationality doesn't work: we are deeply trapped in discomfort, not just a little "unthinkable".
2. We can never relax
This point will appear on our bodies: We are always nervous or stiff and do not like to be touched ( may be a specific part of certain bodies). Doing yoga and meditation is not just unattractive, they make us feel annoying (we might call it sneering hippies) and deep fear.
Our stomach and intestines may also be uncomfortable: often has a direct relationship with our digestive system.
3. We will always find it difficult to fall asleep, and we wake up very early
and we often wake up in a state of high alertness. is like when we sleep, lowering our vigilance, putting ourselves in a greater danger than usual.
4. We hate ourselves deep in our hearts. We think we are ugly, terrible, disgusting; we feel we are terrible, maybe the worst person in the world.
Our sexual preferences often make us feel uneasy too. We find ourselves predatory, disgusting, and very shameful.
5. We are always attracted by people who cannot get
We think we hate people who are clingy, But we actually hate people who are too easy to get. We rush straight to people who are indifferent to us, those who don’t want our passion, and even those who may have undiagnosed avoidance problems ourselves.
6. We hate people who want to be close to us
We will say they are "like puppies", "disgusting" or "hungry".
7. We are prone to lose our temper
Sometimes it is for others, but more often it is for ourselves. We are more worried than being angry, and we are worried that things will become very bad again.
We yelled because we were very scared. We look mean, but we are actually fragile.
8. We are very suspicious
Our suspicion does not mean that we think others will poison us or track us, but We think others will be hostile to us and will find opportunities to defeat and humiliate us.
We may be addicted to similar examples we see on social software. The most unkind and arbitrary environment of the Internet may cause anyone with CPTSD (complexity PTSD) to mistake this as the whole real world. This is mainly because the world is so random and mean to them.
9. We think others are very dangerous
Being alone is very attractive to us. We might want to live under a rock forever. Sometimes, we feel that it is best to never have to see anyone again.
10. We feel very tired of living
We don’t feel that we have a tendency to commit suicide, but we feel that living is really tiring and painful, so sometimes we hope that we no longer exist.
11. We can no longer have any spontaneous intentions outside the plan
We live strictly according to the rules and plans, and everything must be the same as agreed, so as to avoid potential chaos. We may be cleaning constantly, or we may be difficult to distinguish between the sudden change in plans and the recurrence of disasters that we have been afraid of.
12. In the efforts to find security, we may put ourselves in work
We strive to accumulate money, fame, honor, reputation, but all this will not work : Sense of crisis and self-loathing come to us from the deepest part of our hearts, and we will never be able to get peace . Even if a million people are cheering, a ridicule is enough to rekindle our unsolved self-loathing.
However, stopping from work may make us more uneasy; Retirement and holidays will bring more special difficulties.
How to get out of complex PTSD?
How to cure these troublesome symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder?
Part of what we need to do is Be brave to realize that we have experienced some bad things that have not been digested well before this, because there is no kind and stable environment that allows us to do so.
What we are a little weird is because a long time ago the situation was really bad: when we were kids, someone made us feel very unsafe, even if they might be their own parents. They make us think that nothing about ourselves is acceptable. We are forced to endure many difficult separations in the name of "brave" and may have been repeated over and over the years. No one makes us feel at ease about our worth; we are treated unbearably harshly.
These damages may be very obvious, but they tend to expand in quite harmless situations. Any outsider may never notice this, and may even feel that the narration of the air with "We are a happy family." One of the greatest findings in research on complex PTSD is that emotional negligence that occurs in seemingly successful families can be equally destructive as violent behaviors occur in obviously poor families.
If any of the above points make you feel familiar with, needs to stop "brave". We should allow ourselves to feel sympathy for ourselves. This may not be easy because we have always been very strict with ourselves. The next step is to try to find a psychological counselor who is trained to treat complex PTSD, preferably trained specifically for trauma.
Treating trauma requires a great compassion for yourself when you were a child, so that you can face trauma and recognize its impact on a person's life. : What is moving is that the fundamental reason for complex PTSD is the lack of love; similarly, its solution is to relearn how to love someone we are unjustly disliked: ourselves.
Source: The School of Life (YouTube) Translated by: Simple Psychology Ary
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I am the founder of psychological massage therapy, and I have qualifications such as national psychological counselor level 2, international coach certification, and mindful meditation instructor.
Psychological massage therapy: It integrates psychological counseling (for the past), coaching technology (becoming better for the future) and the principles of disease generation. It is not only psychological counseling, but also treats cardiac diseases such as body pain, cancer, oral ulcers, gynecology, asthma , pharyngitis , rhinitis , urticaria and eczema . It has been authorized by the state to protect copyright, registration number: Guozuo Dengzi-2022-A-10038615.
Introduction to psychological massage therapy can be found: psychological massage therapy and its founder
Reference for details on the principles of psychological massage therapy: What exactly is psychological massage? What principle? What are the functions and effects?
