In real society, we can often see some sad phenomena. For example, some children have very high academic qualifications. Even if they have obtained a master's degree or a Ph.D., they still can't find a suitable job, or they don't want to find a job to support themselves, but are willing to nibble at home. We have seen many examples of
. I will not list them one by one here, but there are really too many.
Just imagine, how much hardship and effort it takes for parents to train their children to such a high degree?
As parents, it is necessary to raise children. But the child has achieved academic success, and is already an adult, and is still gnawing at the old at home, this is not justified in any case.
It can be said that this is a kind of indescribable sadness and pain. I think this is something that every parent of us does not want to encounter.
Because as the children get older, the parents are getting older, both their energy and earning ability are declining.
At this time, the elderly have to pay for their children's living expenses such as food, drink and Lazar, which is really a very difficult thing for parents.
But for children, isn't it a kind of "self-willing and depraved" destruction? It destroys the happiness of a child's life!
In this case, the error cannot only be attributed to the child, but the parent should bear the main responsibility.
Because a child is a blank sheet from birth, how the parent teaches, the child may become what kind of person.
Psychologist suggested: If parents do not want to destroy their children's lifelong happiness, please learn to quit gracefully in these nine age groups.
1. At the age of 3 years old, parents withdraw from the table in time
By our side, many children are already four or five years old, and parents are still chasing and feeding. As a result, the children did not eat well and the parents were too tired.
In fact, children need to be nurtured from an early age to eat independently.
When the child first learns to hold a spoon,Parents can try to let their children eat with a spoon.
Even if the child's body is soiled, his face is soiled, even if the child scatters food all over, it doesn’t matter. Mom can help the child clean up. This can exercise the child’s wrist coordination and at the same time Can exercise children's ability to eat independently, so that children gradually learn to eat alone.
2. When children are 4-5 years old, parents learn to leave the bedroom
Many children have learned to sleep independently since they were young, but some children are already very old and they still lie in the same bed with their parents Sleeping is not good for children's growth and independence.
Psychologists believe that when a child is 4 to 5 years old, it is necessary to let the child learn to sleep alone, let the child learn to be independent, and reduce dependence on parents.
3. Children must learn to bathe by themselves before they are 6 years old. Parents leave the bathroom
In fact, children have gender awareness from the age of three. At this time, parents should avoid their children when changing clothes, going to the toilet, and taking a bath.
As children grow up, parents should gradually teach their children to wash their faces and bathe.
Before the child is 6 years old, let the child learn to bathe by himself, and the parents leave the bathroom decently.
Respect children's privacy, starting with children learning to bathe by themselves.
4. When the child is 7 years old, parents withdraw from the child’s private space
Parents must understand that no matter how close the relationship is, they must have their own private space. Therefore, smart parents will know how to withdraw at an appropriate time, leaving private space for their children.
5. When the child is 8 years old, parents withdraw from doing housework
As parents, children should learn to do housework from an early age.Children of any age must learn to do what kind of housework.
Especially when the child is 8 years old, the child will do many things on his own. At this time, the lazier the parents, the more independent the children.
6. When the child is 11 years old, parents have to quit the kitchen and let the child learn to cook by themselves
Let the child learn to cook this thing, in fact, many star children start to learn when they are 4-5 years old. This is commendable.
When the child reaches 11 years old, he can cook a meal independently. Children who can cook will have stronger learning ability or living ability. Only children who can cook can realize the difficulty of their parents, and know how to be grateful and filial.
7. When the child is 13 years old, slowly withdraw from the choice and let the child decide on his own
For 13-year-old children, whether they are good or bad in learning, they have their own opinions. At this time, parents must let their children learn to make their own choices and let them know that their own affairs are in charge.
8. When a child is 18 years old, parents should completely withdraw from helping the child choose
For an 18-year-old child, he is already an adult, and the child’s own affairs can completely decide on his own.
Of course, if the child needs it, the parents can give the child a reference.
9. After the child is married, parents learn to withdraw from the child's family
After the child is married, parents should stop pointing fingers at the child's life.
Because the child has grown into a family, he can work together with his partner to guard his happy life.
Because parents and young people may have differences in lifestyle habits and concepts. If the parents are too involved in the children's life, it will affect the young people's relationship between husband and wife and the harmony and happiness of the family.
It’s right for parents to care about their children.But it is wise to withdraw from the children's small family and not to interfere with the children's lives.
.Wenhaihua Parenting: The published work "Walking through the Flowered Stone Forest"; parenting masters, focusing on the topic of motherhood and parenting, welcome everyone to pay attention to me, if you have any questions, please leave a message in the comment area, thank you for meeting!
