01
The following is the story of a netizen:
I am 36 years old, and I always have high expectations for marriage. I am the second child in my family. My eldest sister is loved and cared by my parents. As for my younger brother, my parents are definitely the best for him.
So, I have been a person who doesn't have much sense of existence since I was young. It may be because of my growing environment that my personality has become very independent. After working, I know very well what kind of life I want, so I am very decisive when making decisions.
I have a relatively sensible attitude towards feelings. There are many girls with love minds around me who can give up everything for love. But in my opinion, only when a woman is economically and spiritually independent can she fully control her own destiny.
Regarding the choice of marriage, I always have a relatively high standard. When I was in my 20s, I didn't focus too much on feelings. Most of the time I was thinking about working hard. After
graduates, I will also fall in love, but I will not get married impulsively. The longest time in a relationship is six years. I have experienced a lot with my ex-boyfriend.
For a while, I still feel that I am very lucky to meet a partner who is spiritually compatible. When interacting with my ex-boyfriend, I feel very relaxed and can truly be myself. We have many common hobbies, like outdoor sports, like reading books, watching movies, and even the food tastes are very similar.
02
Speaking of marriage, except for my ex-boyfriend, I really won’t think about anyone else. However, this relationship that made me so trusted did not go as I expected in the end.
When I was 32 years old, my ex-boyfriend proposed to me. His request was that I could return to the family after getting married. The ex-boyfriend feels that his current ability can support me. I only need to be a beautiful and beautiful wife at home. These words of
may be very moved by other girls. My girlfriend was also involved in her boyfriend’s proposal. When I never agreed to her boyfriend’s proposal, she cried and reminded me to nod quickly.
To be honest, I was not impressed by the promises made by my ex-boyfriend, because I don't want to be the kind of girl he wants after getting married, and my personality is not suitable for being a full-time mother.
So, I didn't give my ex boyfriend a chance, I refused. I know that if I did not agree to his marriage proposal, our six-year relationship is likely to end.
For girls, youth is the most precious thing. If you lose it, you will lose it. But I am not scared at all. What makes me feel scared is that it is difficult for me to imagine that I will become a woman without the ability to be independent. I can't stand a life like that for a day.
Even if I might die alone in this life, I would never choose to marry a man whose three views are inconsistent. In the end, my ex boyfriend and I broke up. I admit that after a woman is over 30, it is difficult to find a suitable partner, so I did not pursue the opposite sex for a while.
But I always feel that God still favors me, because without marrying my ex-boyfriend, I have more time to work on my career, I get promoted and raise my salary, and my income is getting higher and higher. I am a woman who spends money with a plan, so I have a fixed deposit every month. I can earn bread by myself, but what I want is a loving marriage.
Later, when I bought a house, I felt more at ease. My requirements for mate selection have never changed. I just want to find a lover who admires each other and has the same three views.
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However, good fate is very difficult to meet, I am busy with work every day, and basically do not recognize other opposite sex. My parents put a lot of pressure on me in this regard, I do not reject blind dates, and I have the confidence to face different opposite sexes.
However, during my blind date in the past two years, I did encounter some obstacles, which made me less confident.
A while ago, my cousin introduced me to a boy who is two years younger than me, and his work and family conditions are moderate. Part of the reason why I am willing to go on a blind date is not just to find someone, but also to take this opportunity to get to know some friends and not be a couple. Maybe I can become a good business partner.
After I met the boy on the blind date, I felt pretty good overall. However, we only dated for the third time. The boy always wanted to confirm his relationship with me. He also said that he hopedWe can get married in two months. When
chatted with him, the boy on the blind date gave me the feeling that he didn't really like me, but that he wanted to find someone to get married quickly.
I was particularly disgusted in my heart, so I didn't give a positive response to the other party. In the end, I even refused to communicate with each other.
may be my indifferent attitude that made the boy feel shame, so it aroused his anger. When we talked for the last time, he unceremoniously said: "You are 36 years old, and I would marry you. Don’t look too high. You still want to talk about a vigorous relationship. It’s just fantastic. If you don’t, you deserve to be single for a lifetime.” Faced with the malicious slander of blind date boys, I really felt very annoyed at that time, and I was able to take care of it. I just want to find someone who I like to get married. Is that wrong? Older leftover women must meet the label defined by others, and should they choose their own mate?
04
Summary: The troubles of the reader above
have expressed the aspirations of many older single girls.
A woman after 30 years old, will she marry? I think the views of the famous writer Liu Yinhe are worthy of reference.
If you are a person who longs for family and marriage is a necessity in your opinion, then it is necessary to make a proper concession, because not everyone can be so lucky to meet the right person at the right time.
And age is particularly important for women. Missing the best time to get married, no matter how good your conditions are, it will narrow the range of options to a certain extent.
If you feel that your heart is strong enough that marriage is not a must in life, then stick to your attitude. The writer Li Yinhe of
also said that people who desire love need to be mentally prepared to be single for a lifetime.
Regarding marriage, should women die? What others say is not counted, the most important thing is to listen to your own inner voice. The actor Yu Feihong chose an attitude towards marriage and her calmness is worth learning from all women.
In my opinion, compared to being single for a lifetime, I would rather be single than marrying someone hastily to get married. Since it is my own choice, no matter how much pressure I have to bear, I have to smile and live my life well.
There are many ways to be happy, and no one stipulates that you must get married. Unless you are really willing to do it voluntarily in order to have a family, don't lower your standards easily because of someone's advice, because only you know the warmth and coldness of marriage.
