tells the story of a girl's 21-year marriage career. She has a simple idea. When she grows up, she gets married and has children when she meets the person she likes. In the end, her husband cheats on her during marriage and is beaten. When the child grows up, he cannot maintain the marriage and finally the divorce ends.
Self-reporter: Xiaowei
from Sanya, Hainan, China
I was born in a rural family and have five children at home. I have two sisters above, a younger brother and a younger sister below. When I was six years old, my father passed away and left five children. Five years later, my mother remarried and took my younger brother and sister over, and my sister and I stayed at my grandma's house. My grandma is old and no one cares about us. I dropped out of school and went home when I was in the second grade. At home, my sister worked as a waiter in the city at the age of 18. I can only live in the countryside with my grandma. When I was 17 years old, our village had to build a large road to the city. It was also at that time that I knew my husband, and he followed the contractor to build the road. The dormitory they set was not far from my house, and there were a group of young men. Every time I come back from work in the fields, I pass by their dormitory. This way, you will get to know each other after you get familiar with each other. There was an open-air KTV in that era, singing and drinking tea on the roadside. He and his coworkers came back from work and ran to the back door of my house to call me, saying that they didn’t have a cell phone at that time. In this way, we went to the dance hall to play, and sometimes we sang and slowly fell in love. He is also a child from the countryside, and his home is ten kilometers away from my home. When I was 18 years old, I got pregnant, so he took me back to his hometown. His house was in trouble, so he separated the tile house into two bedrooms. Later, our son was born, and our parents raised some money to hold a wedding for us, and the wedding room was also the tile family. Life is urgent at this time, but our relationship is still very good.
He goes to the construction site to work, and I take care of my children at home. Sometimes when the breeding team comes, I go to work for a temporary worker of 50 yuan a day. The child is taken care of by my mother-in-law. Just like this, my eldest son is ten years old. We began to consider having a second child. This is how life is when you decide something. God will also favor you. I am pregnant this year. My husband's work is getting busier and busier, and he also learned to book some construction sites to make wooden stakes for others to build houses. Life is getting better slowly. We also built a floor bungalow and bought a used truck. It is also because life has improved, and his husband is busy with work and sometimes he doesn’t have to go home at night. At first I didn't care too much, I just thought that he would deliver goods to faraway places for socializing and drinking for many times and didn't think too much about it.
In marriage, no matter how far one goes, as long as one's heart changes, everything changes
But at this time, he already has someone outside. My second child was born two months old and was a son. One day my sister told me that I saw my brother-in-law bringing a girl out of the hotel. I was thinking in my heart, "It's impossible for me to be so husband of the Gu family. We went from nothing to slowly get better. He wouldn't treat me like this." I was still half-believing and half-doubted about my sister going to the restaurant in the hotel and really saw them having dinner together. Their actions were like a couple. When I saw this scene, I was stunned and my tears suddenly fell. My heart hurts very much, but I still resisted it and walked over. I wanted to ask him in person, "Why are you doing this to me?" He was also stunned when he saw me standing in front of him. "Why are you here?" "Can't I come? I just want to ask why you are doing this to me." His reaction was to quickly pull the girl out. At that time, I didn’t know where I came from calmness and didn’t cry or make a fuss. He called a taxi for the girl. After the girl left, he explained to me that she was a client. Do you think I will believe it? At that time, I felt like tens of thousands of ants were crawling. My child had just been 2 months old, and I had no job, so I was so tired that I felt so tired. I dare not think about divorce. Where can I go after divorce? My child is so young, where will my future go? All kinds of questions emerged in my mind.
Life is not the fairy tale world in your dream
In the end, I had to go home with him, but I no longer have the trust I had in him before. From then on, we started to have a quarrel. Infidelity in marriage really cannot be turned back.Sometimes he doesn’t go home at night, and I don’t want to ask again. I don’t know if he died of love because he was hurt? Or are you tired of raising your child? Sometimes he doesn't go home but he also takes the money home to take care of me. This kind of life lasted for six years. This year, his family welcomed the expropriation of land and received compensation. We built a first-story and second-story building on the house. I bought a car and I learned my driver's license. The second child is also in the first grade and the eldest is sixteen years old. I didn't know what was wrong with my brain and suddenly wanted a girl to raise it. Finally, we discussed that we decided to adopt a girl and spent 80,000 yuan to apply for an adoption certificate . The child I brought back was only one month old. At this time, there were two shops for rent downstairs in the house, and we lived on the second floor.
Only by turning around is to retain the last dignity for yourself
Marriage grows up year after year for your child. We are also numb, whether it is good or bad, we can tolerate anything for the sake of our children. When the girl was five years old, we ended our marriage for twenty-one years. I took my second son away, and the girl and eldest son were awarded him. I don't want anything on the divorce agreement. I leave all my worthy property to the children and leave the house with nothing. Get married early for love, no matter how hard life is, I insist on enduring my husband's cheating for the sake of my children, and to calm my heart's pain, I left this marriage that I persisted with my youth.
Leaving may be a good or bad decision
People often say that if a person does not have marriage, his life will not be complete. Is marriage an unknown? Only we can explore a suitable way to manage it without interruption! Some people say that two people in marriage are like comrades-in-arms. Only by struggling and encouraging together can you break through. If one party gives up the marriage, it may end. I also understand one truth the more you see through it, the more timid you become.
