Through visiting many couples, although they hope to be old and are disgusted with extramarital affair, they unanimously believe that what is more harmful than extramarital affair is the mutual harm within marriage.
What men and women cannot bear the most are these 20 kinds of harms.
is violence. Violence is the primary reason for divorce. Fighting against each other is not only taking action against home items, but also taking action against family members, hurting each other, and some even violate the law. Among the numerous domestic violence, women are at a disadvantage, but there are also men who are bullied.
The second is cold violence. They hurt each other with verbal harm, mutual Cold War , do not understand each other, ironically control pain, and hurt each other at the spiritual level. At some times, cold violence hurts more than violence.
Third, it is groundless accusation. The couple loses trust and criticizes each other at any time, quarrels constantly, and they keep quarrels, and hurts their children and neighbors.
4 is to deceive each other. It tastes like cheating. It is very good before marriage, but after marriage, it is a mess. Because of property and other issues, I don’t trust it at the beginning and quarrels all the time together.
5: mutual distrust. At the beginning, there was a little freshness. Once the freshness passed, I felt that the other party was nothing. No matter what he did or how hard he tried, he could not meet the requirements and would always speak ill of him.
6 is no physical contact. Without company, you will get annoyed at first sight. There is no reality of husband and wife. You don’t fulfill your obligations to each other, and your marriage is like an empty shell.
7 is not home. I have never taken home in my heart, treated it as a hotel, and came back if I wanted to come back, and spent my days outside without thinking about my family's feelings.
8: Don’t do housework. Men do not look like men, women do not look like women, they do not share family responsibilities, no one does housework, and the family is so messy that they cannot get into the foot, but each does not affect their mischief.
9 is not caring about children. Too many families quarrel over their children and do not fulfill their obligation to educate their children, which makes their children grow up wildly. Too many family conflicts are caused by their children.
is weak to parents. When dealing with the other party’s parents, they cannot treat them fairly and equally. They will go to their own mothers and go back to their own homes, treat them weakly or abuse them.
11 is a heavy debt. Too many family conflicts are caused by property issues, and the income and expenditure are not clear. The two sides argue endlessly on property issues, especially without a certain economic income, but spending ahead of schedule, resulting in high debts.
twelve is transferring property. Both parties lose trust, hide their property, and each runs their own small treasury.
thirteen is mental abuse. Sarcasm and sarcasm, they do not treat each other as human beings, their words are extreme, they do not protect privacy, and they hurt each other.
14 is lying flat. One word is laziness, not very old, just stay at home, do nothing, earn no money, rely on the other party, and do not make money or work if you don’t make money. Give up struggle and achieve nothing.
15 is jealousy. It is still caused by distrust. The other party is wrong in everything. Whenever there is any disturbance, they will blame each other and push the responsibility to the other party.
16 is to compare with each other. Regardless of the actual situation, consume ahead of time, do not compare to career, do not compare to food and drink, do not compare to ability and spend money.
17 There are constant disputes. I don’t trust the other party and operate beyond the family conditions, but I am trapped in various laws and disputes, and my family has no peace.
18 is running away from home. He doesn't have much ability, but he runs away from home from time to time. He comes back after spending his money and treats his home as a hotel.
19 is mutual deception. They do not trust each other, and become disloyal in their relationship. They treat each other as temporary pairings, and have no sense of loyalty or ritual for marriage.
Twenty is to reveal the old truths to each other. Whenever there is a quarrel, they will reveal their true feelings, regardless of the other party's dignity.
In fact, it is not only these 20 items that hurt, but those who have experienced it will tell you that what really endangers marriage is within marriage, not an extramarital affair. Even if you have an extramarital affair, if you can treat people around you well, as long as you don’t let everyone know, everyone will turn a blind eye and close your eyes.
But at any time, extramarital affairs are immoral. If you want to live a good life, be kind to your partner and don’t do things that hurt each other. This is true love.
