01
In traditional concept, it seems that you should have children after marriage, which is natural. If a couple has no children, they will violate the rules and will be under various pressures.
In fact, whether to have a child is the right of this couple, and outsiders have no right to interfere. Even parents of both parties cannot force them, they have the right to decide whether they want children.
But some mothers-in-law don’t think so. In order to make their children have children, they will come up with various methods to constantly put huge pressure on their children, and some families may even cause tragedy.
02
0 I have been married for 8 years and my mother-in-law has to take back the house for her son and daughter-in-law in order to force her son to divorce. The son refused to divorce, so he took his wife to work outside the country, and later adopted a child.
This happened at Xu Meili's house. She suffered a lot of hardships in 8 years to give birth to a child. Fortunately, her husband loved her very much and always kept her away. Let’s listen to their family’s stories.
Self-reporter: Xu Meili
Age: 37 years old
Occupation: Full-time mother
City: Guannan
03
03
Those who have successfully got married and had children will definitely not be able to understand the pain I have experienced. In order to have a child, I have suffered all my hardships. When my husband and I got married, we were looking forward to a bright future like others, and we didn't expect any trouble.
It has been a year since I was married and I was not pregnant yet. We realized that there might be a problem, so my mother-in-law asked us to go to the hospital for a look. So my husband and I went to the hospital, but the examination turned out to be a problem. The doctor said it was difficult to get pregnant.
When I heard this news, I was stunned in the hospital for a long time. I never thought I would have problems with giving birth. My husband was also surprised. He was silent in the hospital for a long time, and neither of us spoke.
After I returned home in a daze, my mother-in-law immediately came to ask about the situation. I think the fire can't be kept in mind, she will know it after all, so I told her the truth. She was stunned at first, then she turned black and kept sighing, saying that the family was unfortunate.
I was suddenly like a dwarf. At night, I filed for the first time with my husband, and my husband denied it. I don’t want to deprive him of his right to be a father because of my problems. He is the only son in the family, and it is normal for parents-in-law to hold grandchildren or granddaughter.
04
Honey's husband disagreed with the divorce, and he said it doesn't matter if he doesn't have children. Although in the hospital, he heard the news suddenly and was not mentally prepared. But on the way home he thought about it, whether he had children or not, he would always be with me.
I was very moved. My husband is so tolerant of me, and I feel more and more sorry for him. So I decided to go to the treatment, but the doctor did not say that I would definitely not be able to conceive, but just said that it was difficult for me to get pregnant, which means there was still hope.
So from the next day, I kept dealing with the hospital, went to see a Western medicine, and then to see a Chinese medicine doctor. As long as I heard that where can cure infertility , I will go. No matter how bitter the medicine is, I will take it as long as it can make me pregnant.
At that time, my mother-in-law no longer gave me a good look. She thought that other people's daughter-in-law had a smooth pregnancy, but I had to spend so much money. I wonder if I could get pregnant, so she was very angry. I could only swallow my anger. My husband felt sorry for me and often quarreled with my mother-in-law, which made me even more resentful.
has been treated for 4 years and has never been pregnant. My husband advised me to forget it, there is no child! Or we can adopt one. I asked in a secret way and found that it is difficult to adopt a child now. It is impossible for us to adopt a child with physical problems in the orphanage, so our parents-in-law will definitely not accept it.
05
0 In-laws clearly said that they did not agree with us adopting the child. My mother-in-law also talked about a lot of the disadvantages of adopting children, saying that when the adopted children grow up, they will look for their biological parents and ignore their adoptive parents, so we will raise them in vain.
I think the situation my mother-in-law said is not impossible, so she dared not insist on adopting it, and she couldn't get it. Since I don’t adopt the child, I can’t give birth to a child and my parents-in-law insist on having a child of my own blood, so I can only let my husband have a child with another woman.
So my mother-in-law asked me to divorce my husband. She said that their family had given me 5 years, and I can't blame them anymore. They have done their best. I had nothing to say, so I could only file for divorce with my husband. But my husband still disagreed, and he had a big fight with his mother-in-law about this.
I feel very sad, I don’t know what to do? I just feel sorry for my husband. My husband accidentally heard that my friend’s relatives’ family was like us. They had not gotten pregnant for several years after getting married. Later, they went to have IVF and now they have given birth to a pair of twins .
My husband suggested that we also do IVF! Of course I agreed immediately. It was like a person who fell into the water grabbed a life-saving straw, and I pinned my hopes on doing IVF.
06
Ko has been doing it for three years, constantly spending time in egg retrieval, fetal matching and transplantation, but in the end it still failed. It is easy for others to have children, but it is harder for me than climbing to the sky. I don’t know why God is so unfair?
In these three years, my mother-in-law quarreled with me every few days, one because I was not pregnant for a long time; the other is because I spent a lot of money on IVF. So she talked about divorce every day and wanted to drive me out of my house, but her husband refused to divorce.
Because IVF costs a lot of money and I can’t work hard to make money, so my husband and I are not rich. If I was rich, my husband would definitely take me out and pass it alone, but we can only endure it if we have to suffocate the hero with just one dollar.
After three years of IVF, my husband advised me to give up. If I continue to do it, my body will not be able to bear it. I also decided not to do it. It was not because I was afraid that my health would not work, but because I felt that my hope was slim and I had already spent a lot of money. I didn’t want to waste the money my husband had worked hard to earn.
After mother-in-law learned that we were not doing IVF, she sent us an ultimatum, asking her husband to either divorce me or return the house to them. The house we live in was bought by our in-laws. When my in-laws sold their old house and bought this new house as our wedding house.
07
Mother-in-law thought that her husband had no choice but to force her husband to do so, so she divorced me and married a woman who could have children again. But my husband still disagreed with the divorce. He took me to work outside the country, which was considered as returning the house to his in-laws.
My parents-in-law was so angry that they said they had no such son from now on. I feel guilty towards my husband. If it weren't for my problem, why would he have had a fuss with his in-laws like this? I had no choice but to be kind to him twice as much as possible and express my feelings.
After working in another place, the couple gradually returned to normal without the pressure from their parents-in-law and the idea of having to have children. A year later, a fellow villager who worked as a cleaner in the hospital told us that a girl had a child out of wedlock and wanted to give her child away, so she told us.
Later, my husband and I adopted this child and went through the adoption procedures. My husband said he would not tell his in-laws for the time being and would go back in a few years. Then he would tell them that we were born by ourselves. Now tell them what they will definitely guess immediately and they will firmly disagree.
I think my husband is very thoughtful, so he followed the method he said. In order to take care of the children, I became a full-time mother. The arrival of this child is a treasure for us, and both of us are very precious.
Conclusion:
Some people can easily get things, while some people can't get things after all the hardships. There is no way, this is the case in the world. Everyone can only keep a calm mind and face it calmly. No one's life is perfect. You are lacking in this aspect, and maybe you are good in other aspects.
Just like Xu Meili, although she cannot get pregnant and has not given birth to a biological child, she is very sorry, but she has a rock-solid love. No matter what happens, no matter how her parents-in-law asks them to divorce, her husband always keeps away from her.
This love is very valuable. You should know that there are countless women who can have children, but they are ruthlessly abandoned by their husbands. So while God closes a door for you, he will also open a window for you. Xu Meili does not have a child, but has a husband who loves her deeply.
In fact, there is no need to be too obsessed with having your own child. There are many things that you need to learn to adapt. The benefits of having children and having children, and there are benefits of not having children. No matter which way of life, it is full of sweet, sour and bitter.
Author: A creator in the emotional field, focusing on various issues in the emotional field, welcome to follow. Life is warmth because of love and love. Let us grow in love and spend every day in true love.
