My friend Xiao 7 is the veritable "scumbag harvester" .
She has dated three objects, namely:
fishing male escaping problems cold violent male singularly, cold violent male sing only saith not to do scattered cake .
She was severely injured and was empty for 3 years, and recently she finally showed signs of love again.
But she was very scared, and this time she fell in love with a scumbag again.
01.
People who frequently meet scumbags like Xiao 7 have a very popular concept in recent years called "slag absorption constitution" . The posts analyzed by
are similar, and most of them will mention 's native family, flattering personality, and lack of self.
Xiao 7 compared the reasons listed by the emotional blogger. She diagnosed herself as the "love-loss physique" that is most easily controlled by scumbags.
Because I have never received good love, it is easy for the other party to get up with just a little bit of good feelings, and then double down on loving the other party.
She made the songs written by the other party for her into vinyl record , but after breaking up, she found that the man had sent almost 10 girls.
In order to surprise the other party, she worked for two weeks and changed several days of vacation. When she met, she was scolded for a sudden attack.
After being tortured repeatedly, Xiao 7 vowed:
Never bewitched by scumbags again.
During that time, any friend encountered emotional problems.
She will throw out a few emotional information posts in the group:
"How do high-ranking scumbags control you step by step"
"How do scumbags trick girls? Be careful when encountering》
...
Rich theories and 3 personal experiences, Xiao 7 gave us a lot of ideas. When it was my turn to fight, I was afraid of my hands.
These anti-slag strategies give her a sharp eye and learn to weigh the pros and cons.
also made her start to retreat, entangle, and hesitate.
The state of small 7 reminds me of Fu Seoul 's speech in " Strange Talk ":
"Because of deep affection, I will never invest again. This sounds even more sad than being scumbag."
02.
Many girls like small 7 will reflect on them when they frequently meet scumbags:
"Why do I always meet scumbags?"
The Internet will tell you that it is your heart that is too soft and you are too naive.
You are sensitive, inferior, and lack security. You deserve to meet a scumbag.
The reasons summarized afterwards seem to be logical and impeccable. makes you doubt yourself and think that being scumbag is your problem.
But as a friend of Xiao 7, I witnessed her three failed relationships with my own eyes.
What I saw was brave, serious and romantic.
She will take the initiative after the other party expresses her favor, prepares careful gifts for the other party, and is also grateful for the surprises she receives.
I don’t think there are any problems with the relationship like this.
Of course, even if you are single in or have a smooth relationship, social media will always sound the alarm for you.
They say that infp is the first choice for scumbags, and Pisces women are the best scumbags in the eyes of scumbags.
It seems that if I get scum, it must be my fault, it must be my fault.
It seems that as long as you do everything right, you can avoid all risks and gain a happy and fulfilling love.
It's like a victim's self-condemnation.
But the one who is wrong is obviously a scumbag, not you.
03.
I wonder if you feel the same way:
In recent years, the word "scratch" has appeared very frequently.
Some friends often say that they have been scumbag again, and many people never shy away from being scumbags before.
While teaching us to identify scumbags, the Internet also encourages us to be high-level scumbags.
The definition of slag has become very broad and subjective.
Except for saying that the other party is half-hearted and irresponsible in the relationship.
It is now more like a joke and a self-mockery.
The word "slag" is deconstructed to take the dominance of the relationship. But ignore the complexity behind intimacy.
I was thinking, maybe it was the expression of "slagging" that made us unconsciously put ourselves in the position of the victim.
Rather than saying that you are hurt by the scum, this is our exercise in facing complex intimate relationships.
In our lives, we will always encounter a few wrong people.
But there is nothing wrong with giving, I believe that love is nothing wrong.
Why is he so scumbag? I can't forget him, and there is nothing wrong with it.
Don’t laugh at yourself for being so stupid, and don’t have to fully arm your arms and refuse everything to start.
once loved seriously and bravely,
is still there,
can love seriously and bravely.
Sincere
is the real secret weapon
