01
The ancients said: "The faith of mediocre words is the carefulness of mediocre actions."
You must be very cautious when it comes to words and deeds. Otherwise, it would be better to be silent once if you say ten thousand words.
In the old age, people are elders at home and elders in society, and they need to "establish morality and words".
Therefore, the elderly should learn to be silent. It is best not to say the following words to make their image more decent.
02
First, if you can't say it, it's "integrity".
There is a story in "Yuan Family Instructions": The home of the Ming Dynasty thinker Yuan Liaofan will hold a family meeting before the Chinese New Year to summarize the achievements of the year and talk about the plans for the next year.
Yuan Liaofan said confidently, "I recently learned " Mencius ". Rest assured, it is a way to do academic research."
father nodded and asked, "Can you be honest and sincere?"
Yuan Liaofan said, "Yes."
father asked, "How can it be?"
Yuan Liaofan said, "No evil thoughts in his heart are just correct."
It is not difficult to find that as parents, we should ask the bottom line about their children's ideas and practices to avoid their children talking big and empty words.
As a child and a teenager, you will inevitably be arrogant because of a little bit of grades and think that you can really become a scientist or astronaut.
Parents are adults and the elderly. They should not blindly encourage their children to pursue the goal of "high-end" but guide their children to be down-to-earth and know their own weight.
We often make fun of "Wang Po" - Wang Po sells melons and boasts about it.
In fact, many elderly people have become "Wang Po" invisibly. For example, when you open your mouth, you talk about how many decisions you made in the workplace, how wise you were, and show off your contributions; when you talk about your business, you think you are very profitable.
The older the person, the more you need to be down-to-earth. Don’t promise others what you can’t do, nor do you tell me about things you can’t do in front of your family; remind me of your children’s unrealistic ideas and practices in a timely manner.
03
Second, if you have only a few understandings, you can avoid "misunderstanding".
Philosopher Wittgenstein said: "Everything that can be said can be clearly stated; anything that cannot be discussed should be kept silent."
Knows it as knows it, but don't know it as you don't know. When a person gets older, his experience will naturally be enriched, but he cannot think that he is a "omniscient" person because of this. Society is developing and emerging things are constantly arising, and we need to learn continuously.
For things you don’t understand, you should wait and see if you don’t understand, rather than mixing around at will.
For example, on the way to buy vegetables, you saw a woman sitting on the side of the road, her clothes were not very neat. Intuition, you think a woman has drunk alcohol and done bad things. If accusing a woman, it will cause harm. Perhaps, the woman encountered difficulties and was upset.
People are old and care for others. This is what they should do, but care should be moderate and real. You can't always speak based on experience. Most of the time, you have to wait and see and be a bystander and listener.
04
Third, only if you can’t stand other people’s words and don’t say them, you can only reflect “respect and affinity”.
In " Yilin ", the author "Snow" wrote a story: When she was in high school, her deskmate was a very arrogant girl, Jinhua.
Jinhua has good grades, but she never talks to her classmates and is used to being alone.
One day, she discovered that Jinhua lives in a single-parent family. Since she was six years old, she has not seen her mother again. My father tried every means to support his family, but the family was still very poor.
She took Jinhua to her home as a guest. Jinhua just watched TV alone and rarely talked to her. "Snow"'s parents respect Jinhua from beginning to end. Obviously, this is a family that has communicated well long ago - Jinhua needs love, but love must be very quiet.
There is a saying that if you don’t go through the suffering of others, don’t persuade others to be good.
How to love others and care for younger generations cannot be explained clearly in just a few words. Instead, we must understand the "story behind" life with our heart.
Those who you don’t like often have indescribable sadness and different paths to growth.
There is a generation gap between parents and children, and there is also a problem of disagreement in their values, let alone outsiders?
Therefore, a kind old man will not point fingers at people he doesn't like, but face it with a smile. In the family, daughter-in-law and son-in-law are difficult to be accepted by the elderly. The fundamental reason is that the elderly do not know how to exchange hearts; outside the family, we often meet villains because we do not know the life experience of villains and their ideals.
If you don’t say that you look down on others or hate others, the elderly will be more friendly and will be recognized by society. No matter who you meet , you will think at the first time that person is the child of your parents.
05
Fourth, if you attack each other, it is not just the "wisdom of bowing your head".
I became angry and clenched my fists. Many elderly people are older and have worse health than before, but their tempers are still not restrained.
The principle of "force and reaction force" tells us that your attack on others will return to yourself. After making trouble, the power will not only not weaken, but will increase.
Say less and take the initiative to apologize to the other party. The matter will be over and everyone will be peaceful.
Maybe you are not wrong, but if you don’t know how to bow your head, you are wrong. Lowering your head is actually a stop loss.
Rand wrote in "Life and Death": "I don't fight with anyone, and I don't care about anyone."
People are old, and they fight for nothing, and money and body will disappear. Why bother verbally "win back a game"?
06
Of course, silence is not about not talking all the time, but about using the silence to think, thereby changing the direction of the situation and avoiding various conflicts. As Zhou Guoping said: "Silence is closer to the essence than words, and beauty is more valuable than power."
Facing the ups and downs of life, mature people always look at it calmly and bear it. Before we knew it, we became accustomed to silence.
In the old age, people will be right and wrong, and their credit will be wrong. It is best to just smile; in interpersonal communication, if people do not offend me, I will not offend others. If people offend me, I will leave.
always believe that tranquility leads to far, silence is gold.
Author: Common people eat coarse food.
Follow my text and enter your heart.
The pictures in the article are from the Internet.
