01
Marriage is a major event in life and must be treated with caution. If you want to be happy in marriage, you must first choose the right person to marry, and then manage the marriage well. Both husband and wife must work hard and work together to achieve a successful family run.
When choosing a suitable marriage partner, you should not only observe the person, but also his family. When a girl marries, she not only marries the man, but also his family. The influence of the native family on a person is great, and some may even affect a person's life, so we must pay attention to the native family .
When observing the subject and his family, we must put character first. Character is the most important. If the person and his family have bad character, no matter how good their family's conditions are, you will not be happy if you marry him.
02
After being in love for half a year, the girl went to her boyfriend’s house for the first time and overheard her prospective parents-in-law discussing her marriage with her boyfriend. After hearing this, the girl was surprised! After going home and thinking about it all night, the girl broke up with her boyfriend.
This is what happened to Gao Jingjing. She didn't expect her boyfriend's parents to be so calculating. She didn't want to have a poverty alleviation-style marriage. Let’s hear her story below.
Narrator: Gao Jingjing
Age: 27 years old
Occupation: Nurse
City: Loudi
03
I am a nurse. Once, a patient was admitted to our hospital. Because his son and his family were abroad, he invited a relative to live there. The son came to take care of him. A relative's son happened to be fine those days, so he came to help, and I got to know this relative's son.
His name is Sun Qiang. He is very handsome and good at talking. Every time I go to the ward, he always talks to me enthusiastically. Later, when the patient was about to be discharged from the hospital, Sun Qiang added me on WeChat and said he wanted to be a WeChat friend.
Since becoming a friend, Sun Qiang has been in contact with me every day, asking for help, and slowly we have developed into lovers. At that time, I was immersed in love and felt very happy, without considering other conditions at all.
Half a year later, I told my parents about my relationship with Sun Qiang, but my parents did not approve. My parents have no objection to Sun Qiang. They are dissatisfied with the situation of Sun Qiang's family. Sun Qiang's family lives in a rural area. His parents have no formal jobs except farming and do odd jobs here and there. Sun Qiang also has a sister who is married.
I think my parents are snobbish and dislike the poor and love the rich. I was marrying Sun Qiang, not his parents, so I insisted on being with Sun Qiang. My parents had no choice but to agree with me after being in a stalemate for a while. My dad told me that the person you choose will be responsible for whether your life will be good or bad in the future.
04
If my parents insist on objecting, I will have a rebellious mentality and insist on being with my boyfriend. But after my parents stopped objecting and told me to take responsibility, I hesitated a little. I think my parents have their own reasons for disapproving, and I can no longer have my own way.
So, I proposed to go to my boyfriend’s house. Anyway, I would have to meet my parents-in-law sooner or later. Sun Qiang called his parents, made an appointment, and then took me back to the countryside. After arriving at my boyfriend's house, although the conditions at my boyfriend's house were not very good, my prospective parents-in-law were very enthusiastic towards me and made me feel good.
After lunch, Fa Xiao heard that Sun Qiang was back and came to see Sun Qiang. He jokingly said to me, asking me to borrow Sun Qiang for two hours, and they wanted to meet some of their little brothers. Of course I agreed, and Sun Qiang was sent to meet some other brothers. I was alone in Sun Qiang's room playing with my phone.
My parents-in-law-to-be went to the kitchen to clean up the dishes. After playing with my phone in the room for a while, I wanted to go to the kitchen and pour a glass of water. When I walked to the kitchen door, I heard the conversation between my prospective parents-in-law, and I suddenly felt very uncomfortable.
05
The prospective mother-in-law said: "This girl is from the city. I heard from my son that her family is in good condition, so how much gift should we give when we get married?"
"Their family is in good condition, so what kind of gift should we give? They only have one daughter. "The property does not belong to this daughter, nor to our son. Rich people don't care about the gift money, so don't think about it. Our son has the ability, as long as he takes care of this girl, everything will be taken care of." .
The prospective mother-in-law added: "That's right. In this case, let their family prepare the wedding house! Our family can't afford to buy a house in the city, so let their family buy it! After we get married, we will go My son lives in the city, and I can enjoy the blessings of having a son."
The prospective father-in-law smiled and said, "I have been looked down upon by others all my life, but I never thought that my son would be so ambitious that he could marry a city girl." This girl talked to her parents and asked her parents to help our girl find a job so that her daughter and son-in-law could be reunited. "
" Yes, my daughter has been taking care of the children at home and her son-in-law is working alone in the city. It is definitely not good for the husband and wife to be separated for a long time. "Okay. I heard from my son that my daughter-in-law's father is a section chief in some bureau and he is a powerful person, so arranging a job will be a piece of cake," said the prospective mother-in-law.
After hearing this, I couldn't listen anymore. I didn't expect that my prospective parents-in-law would have such an idea. I don’t understand why they feel that our family should serve them as a matter of course?
06
On the way Sun Qiang sent me home that day, I asked him tentatively, what would he do if his parents asked our family to do something? He said that if anything happens, we are all on our own, and we should help each other.
I mentioned the bride price and the wedding room again, and he said I was tacky. What age are we in now, and we still need a bride price! As for the wedding house, our family’s conditions are good, so let’s buy it! His parents have no money, so we can't embarrass them. After we get married, we will take them to live in the city so that they can also enjoy happiness.
I understand. It turns out that the reason why the prospective parents-in-law had such thoughts was actually Sun Qiang’s thoughts. Sun Qiang felt that after marrying me, he jumped from one class to another, and our family should serve their family.
After I got home, I thought about it over and over again all night, and the next day I asked Sun Qiang to break up. Sun Qiang's attitude was very good at first. He kept asking me why, begging me to change my mind and saying that he loved me very much.
After I told him that we were not suitable for each other and insisted on breaking up with him, he became angry and yelled at me. He said that after I went to his house and found out that his family was very poor, I disliked the poor and preferred the rich, so I wanted to break up with him. I didn't explain, he could say whatever he wanted, anyway, I didn't want to date him.
Conclusion:
It is best to be well-matched when getting married. Being well-matched is the experience gained by our ancestors on marriage and love issues, which is very reasonable. The "match" mentioned here does not only refer to the family conditions of the two families, but also refers to the match in all aspects.
If two people are similar in all aspects, they will have similar views and have more common languages. When dealing with things after marriage, two people with the same views are more likely to reach a consensus and less likely to have disagreements and conflicts.
Gao Jingjing wanted to marry Sun Qiang out of love, but Sun Qiang's family obviously took a fancy to Gao Jingjing's family's conditions. They want to use marriage as a springboard to achieve a class jump, which is problematic in its guiding ideology. When Gao Jingjing realized this, she decisively broke up.
Girls should listen more to their parents’ opinions when choosing a marriage partner. After all, their parents have been through it all and will have a more accurate vision. The girl should visit her husband's house more often and learn as much as possible before making a decision. She must be cautious about getting married.
Author: A creator in the emotional field, focusing on various issues in the emotional field, welcome to pay attention. Life is warm because of affection and love. Let us grow in love and spend every day in true love.
