text/Lillian who will never lose my love
pictures/from the Internet
In front of outsiders, I really worked hard, spoke very gently, and tried my best to smile, so that others would feel that we have self-cultivation, no matter how big things happened , no matter what kind of desperate situation you have experienced, it has nothing to do with others after all, and others do not owe you anything, so you should maintain the courtesy and posture you should have.
However, at home, at a certain moment, you will explode or collapse, you will feel that your life is so unbearable, and you will wonder what the meaning of being in this world is? After that, I calmed down and felt that everyone only comes to this world once. There are flowers, grass, picturesque scenery, and many beautiful clothes and exquisite shoes. There are many things that please us humans that we are so reluctant to part with.
Life has its ups and downs, and I am swaying in this world. Some people are very positive and some people are very pessimistic. I am somewhere in between, so I am often confused and helpless. I don’t want to actively explore the outside world, nor do I want to shrink in this house forever, spinning around in confusion every day.
Before, I yearned so much for the big world outside, but now I feel that it is not easy for this world and this land to accept a mediocre person like me. I will not have too many demands or too many extravagant expectations.
I don’t know what the future holds, I don’t know what happens to others. I only know that I have been hit physically and mentally. A man has caused so much harm. Why should all the pressure be thrown away from me? You know I can’t do it. Did you see me shouting at the top of my lungs? Have you seen my increasingly haggard face? Have you seen my repeated setbacks at work? Have you seen my fear and uneasiness in facing life? Have you seen my caution? Sometimes I want to find a place to cry loudly. After crying, everything will disappear. After crying, everything will become calm, right?
I really don’t know what to do when I’m stressed? Trying to suppress it? Desperately hiding? Or find a place where no one is and explode instantly?
Author/Lillian who will never lose my love
Thank you for your support and attention [Prayer] [Prayer] [Prayer]
